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About KeelanDElliott

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    Honolulu, HI
  1. KeelanDElliott

    Why did they change the theme song?

    Since I live in Hawaii, I feel like it falls to me to answer this call. *Sequesters self away in tiny hut thatched with palm leaves*
  2. KeelanDElliott

    EPISODE 116 — Top Dog: LIVE!

    Does it bother anyone else how Chuck Norris finds the supremacists' list of targets? Reno is sniffing in a drawer and Chuck opens it to pull out a donut bag, drops the classic line "I should have known" and proceeds to search other parts of the desk. But Reno keeps whining to direct Norris' attention back to the aforementioned drawer, wherein Chuck finds a secret button that opens up the top of the desk. How the hell did Reno know that was in there? He didn't stick his head in and see it, so can he smell secret buttons?
  3. KeelanDElliott

    EPISODE 115 — Sharknado 3: Oh Hell No!

    Scorpiclone. A cyclone full of scorpions. Pretty much my worst nightmare.
  4. KeelanDElliott

    EPISODE 114 — Runaway

    Okay, I loved watching this movie. Had a great time. Had a couple of thoughts that I haven't seen mentioned yet and weren't in the episode. 1) The cornfield robots are maybe 2 feet tall and 2 feet wide? If that? One shot shows the runaway bot as small enough to fit between two rows of corn. Yet, when the chopper arrives carrying Ramsey, they're tracking the robot via this swath of destroyed corn that has to be at least 4-5 rows of corn across to be seen from the height that helicopter would be flying at, either the robots needed to be way bigger (which would have at least made them seem dangerous enough to necessitate a call) or the swath needed to be way, way smaller. 2) The baby that Ramsey saves. Who the hell is taking care of it? The mom and sister have been killed by the robot with the Magnum, and later we see the father holed up in the hotel, with the baby clearly not there. So that piece of garbage dad sold out his company to Gene Simmons and let CPS scoop up his kid after the death of his wife and daughter. Father of the year there. 3) The robot with the magnum.....wtf. Among other issues with the scene, no one has mentioned the fact that Ramsey dodges two or three shots from the robot because of the loading sound of a shotgun..... but the robot is supposed to have a magnum. Magnums don't have a cocking sound, they have a rotating chamber. I literally had the subtitles on and it says "Shotgun loading" and it confused the hell out of me cause they'd only mentioned a .357 magnum and I thought, oh shit the robot has an arsenal Ramsey doesn't even know about in there! Nope, just bad script supervision, why not just give the robot a shotgun? This movie was so much fun to watch, I think my favorite scene was the random insertion of the psychic, it blew my mind when she showed up. I thought maybe Ramsey was going to team up with her for the rest of the movie for something? How great would it have been if Ramsey was actually a robot and he ended up needing to team up with the psychic because he couldn't think outside the box due to his robot programming?
  5. KeelanDElliott

    Airbud (1997)

    I mean, it's about a basketball playing dog, what else do you need to hear. That's really all I can remember, that and it's the only kids movie I think I ever watched that was so unbearably sad I didn't want to watch it again. But now I think it'd be a great choice!
  6. KeelanDElliott

    Space Jam (1996)

    I loved this movie as a kid, I still get goosebumps when the little mouse announcer character is introducing the TuneSquad and they introduce Michael Jordan as "his royal Airness", I love that shit cause I am a nerd. I haven't seen the movie in awhile, but I don't know if it is really bad enough to make it the right pick for HDTGM. I mean, yes, it's about people and cartoons interacting, but that's not a big deal cause it's the central conceit of a movie for children (Pete's Dragon, Mary Poppins, Bedknobs and Broomsticks, clearly this is precedented). Otherwise, it's a pretty linear plot. The underdogs overcome the odds to save the day at the last second. There are a few moments that I can imagine would throw the HDTGM crew for a loop, like Wayne Knight digging up an entire golfing green, but again, it's a movie for children and that scene makes me laugh ( the old man yelling "He's fixing a divot!" After Wayne has completely eradicated the entire green) so I think it's worth it. It's a kids movie, and not a bad one really. If you're gonna do a kids movie why not do something really awful like a Chipmunks movie, or AirBud which would probably be the end of June (saddest children's movie ever?).
  7. KeelanDElliott

    The signs of a bad movie list

    Don't forget the wonderful barbecue baseball scene in the Lance Bass classic "On the Line", what a great episode!
  8. KeelanDElliott

    EPISODE 112 — Jupiter Ascending

    I just want to begin this post by saying how much I love this show. I just got back from working in rural Kenya for four weeks so I've been off the grid for the release of Jupiter Ascending, TMNT II: Secret of the Ooze, and Runaway. While I was sweating away at night in the protection of my mosquito net, I would listen to old episodes that I had happened to save on my PC before I left any form of internet behind. I listened to Street Fighter probably six times, I still lose my shit every time June asks "What, exactly, is a Street Fighter". When I listened to the intro to TMNT2 I got emotional because I was so happy June was back. I know that is insane, but I don't care, I love HDTGM. I'm posting in Jupiter Ascending because the very first movie I watched when I returned to civilization...was this piece of garbage. I watched this movie on my plane ride from Nairobi to Dubai, and selected it over various phenomenal options like Avengers 2, Live Die Repeat, and Inherent Vice. Kenya Airways even stocks great classics like Goodfellas, Casablanca, and When Harry Met Sally. All of which I could have spent two hours enjoying, but instead I spent my first hours back on the grid watching Channing Tatum sky ice-skate his way in to Mila Kunis' pants. Other than brilliant visuals, this movie makes absolutely no sense. I still cannot figure out why Sean Beane was mad at Tatum, then friends with him, then sold him out, then joined forces with him again, and somewhere in there was a throw away line about the daughter who left to get groceries and of course never came back. And I know they touched on it in the episode but I was furious with how unphased Jupiter was with being called "your majesty" by everyone. It was literally all I could do to not yell at the screen and wake up all the normal, sleeping passengers around me. Also, I'm sure people were annoyed by me unintentionally belting out laughs at the way Channing Tatum swings his arms back and forth as he roller-derbies his way out of trouble. I absolutely agree that he must have realized this was a huge mistake on like the second day of shooting. In conclusion this movie was terrible and I love HDTGM. Thank you Jason, Paul and June and all the interns and guests for giving us this great free show. In fact, I love this show so much, I'm sitting in my hotel room in Dubai right now, watching HDTGM great Jean Claude Van Dam and Dennis Rodman tear it up in the classic film, Double Team.
  9. KeelanDElliott

    Why did they change the theme song?

    The new theme song is so clever and bad ass, it fucking gives me goosebumps every time I hear it. Guy who made it, who's name I cannot remember, if you happen to be reading this, thank you so, so much.