AshleyChupp

https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=92&v=v4IC7qaNr7 can't figure out how to embed video in my post so FUCK IT i'm never posting here again

Greetings, Truth Seekers. Here are your planetary transits for today: Sun currently in Libra While ideal for socializing, especially on a more superficial level, the temptations of this transit will lead you to sacrifice your ideals for the sake of maintaining harmony and good will with others. This transit will also bring out your talkative side which is good for those of you who are shy, but a possible danger for those already inclined to be verbose. The important takeaway for dealing with this transit is to keep your goddamn mouth shut until someone says something that offends you or violates your beliefs at which point extreme soapbox monologues and antagonistic behavior are the best tools at your disposal. Moon currently in Taurus You may be feeling a bit sluggish and stubborn deep down during this transit. Now is not the time for surprises or big changes. You want to slow down and savor the finer things in life, so fuckin' do it, bro. You deserve the good stuff. Mercury (Retrograde) currently in Libra A retrograde Mercury in Libra is a dangerous sign for announcements, interviews, essays or any occasion which requires careful, concise communication. The best course of action is to either lock yourself in your room until October 9th when Mercury turns direct or, if such a plan is not actionable, to avoid saying anything of actual meaning until this retrograde period has ended. Master the art of meaningless small talk and casual conversational misdirection. You heard about my mother's cancer diagnosis and are wondering how I'm doing? The real question, my friend, is did you happen to catch Survivor last night? Venus currently in Leo Now is the time for bold action in the realms of love and sex. Pursue aggressively, and never back down. Yes, it's true that "no" usually means no, but during this transit, a "no" is just a "yes" on delayed release. Mars currently in Virgo Most problems that arise during this transit you'll approach from a logical perspective, and you will take an active stance in addressing them. When your girlfriend comes home crying from a bad day at work, be sure to firmly recite various algebra problems to her until she calms herself. Jupiter currently in Virgo Any power to be gained from this transit lies in hard work and dedication. Sorry bout that. Saturn currently in Sagittarius This transit facilitates a shift in focus from havin' fun and fuckin' around to embracing responsibility and maturity. Sorry bout that. Uranus (Retrograde) currently in Aries A Uranus in retrograde will awaken shifts in your subconscious desires you have not expected. A Uranus in Aries means these shifts will relate to your independence and charisma. Maybe you'll finally admit to yourself that you're not actually proud of being the office outcast and having to borrow money from your wealthy grandmother every month. Neptune (Retrograde) currently in Pisces Neptune, ruler of the sea, is completely at home in watery, emotional Pisces, and a retrograde Neptune increases our intuition and sensitivity. Trust your feelings, as hard as it may be right now to access them. The deepest, most buried emotion you can find will present you with the absolute best course of action in any situation right now. Trust me. Your most basic, animal-level desires need to be your driving force. Pluto currently in Capricorn Embrace the influence of this transit, and your ambition will make you terrifying and unstoppable. On second thought, please don't embrace the influence of this transit. Thank you, Truth Seekers. Contact me with your date and time of birth, your social security number and the name of your bank for a personalized analysis of the planets and how they secretly determine everything you think, feel and do. All for the low, low price of $69.69!!

Buy me some rose quartz healing crystals, and I'll cast a spell for you. What is it you desire? Money? Power? Love? I'll make you a king of men, Michael; all I need is those crystals. Those crystals and a vial of your blood. Can you do that for me? http://www.amazon.com/Tumbled-Gemstones-Crystals-Healing-Supplies/dp/B002GW67KC/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&qid=1443660459&sr=8-9&keywords=rose+quartz

Serious question is the girls getting special attention thing just a bit you guys do? Cause I thought y'all were serious about that but there are actually tons of girls here and it doesn't seem like they get any special treatment because of it.

I've only been here a week and I already get TONS of likes. (Don't fact-check that, totally not worth your time just trust me.)

Chickn! You need to be paying attention in school, you lazy miscreant. Just remember when you take my little sister to prom that she only does hand stuff under the bleachers with straight A students.

I'm back, guys. You're my best friends. Haha fuck reddit am I right? What a buncha losers they only WISH they could be as nice and smart and funny and cool as us.

I wasn't on ANY of those likes-to-posts lists, WHAT the FUCK I pour the depths of my heart out to you guys. Tell you about my veganism and the fact that I have an ex boyfriend. And THIS is what I get? Completely ignored? Pfffftttt I don't even care. This whole thing is like, so immature and I'm so over the drama. I only came here for the pro version anyway. I'm going to reddit, see ya NEVER. *slams door*

I know Mad Mex! Because I'm in Pittsburgh too, remember? Remember that? Mad Mex always has food that suits my Vegan Needs.

I'm vegan, and this offends me. Please delete.

God DAMMIT I haven't even come close to finishing Unity yet, and Syndicate is coming in less than a month. This would've been the best time for a layoff what a missed opportunity.

The company I work for announced an unprecedented number of layoffs today. Tragically, I was not one of them. What's a gal gotta do to collect some unemployment up in here? Work is cutting into my podcast time.

Just re-listened to the listener call-in episodes now that I know some of the names around here. I gotta say, I feel weird now. Like I know too much about you guys. Like I've heard things I wasn't meant to.

It's good that you liked your own post, greggy. That shows confidence, and confidence is everything.

Fuck winter, zero stars Fuck summer, zero stars Spring has too many allergies, zero stars Fall needs to quit dropping dead leaves on my head, zero stars

I don't appreciate this outside reference, and I don't think Hayes or Sean will either.

I just stalked my horrifying deadbeat ex boyfriend's twitter for the first time in months. Apparently he listens to Hollywood Handbook now. How dare he taint the love of my life like this?

You have some v intense feelings about this, horsey. Have you considered speaking to a therapist about it? Or at least a kindly old stranger at the bus stop?

This is bad of me to say, but HH and (to a lesser extent) UTU2TM kind of ruined podcasts for me. I used to listen to and greatly enjoy many different shows. Now if I try to listen to, say, WSGLL or HDTGM, I just give up halfway through and listen to an HH or UTU2TM ep I've already heard at least six times. Nothing else just seems that good anymore.

I liked the one where they got into a fight about whether a turtle shell qualifies as a snowboard. Their navigation of that argument and making up afterward was pure genius IF you ask me.

An epic Doctor Who/Maxwell Keeper fanfiction for your consideration. What could be more perfect for our favorite Time Keeper than a trip through time with the Doctor? https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11525889/1/The-Doctor-and-the-Time-Keeper I spent many more hours on this than I would care to admit. It was infinitely more difficult than I anticipated. I nearly went insane. That is not an exaggeration. Please make sure I did not waste the past several days of my life, and do me the honor of reading this, the most absurd way I have ever spent my time. Safe for work, no sexy stuff.

I posted in the CBB forum earlier today and have been completely ignored. Fortunately my tarot reading foretold rejection in my near future so I was prepared for this. I'm still never listening to CBB again, though.

DOUG BENSON IS FIFTY?!?!?!?!?!

I have mostly lukewarm feelings toward all the Wompler eps of CBB, and I'm afraid that that makes me a bad feminist.

It's my day off, so naturally I have a tight schedule planned of doing various party drugs alone in my room. However, I took a bit of time this morning after my instant coughy to listen to some more PAW eps before commencing with my tasks for the day. Son of Greggy is a veritable comedic genius, and it is quite clear from whence he inherited such talent. Is Greggy considering running for the Republican presidential nomination or was that just a rumor I heard at the caucus meeting?