Dead_Armadillos

They say a bird in the hand is worth two in the tush, but I'm not taking anal double-penetration for one measly parakeet.

By Dead_Armadillos, February 25, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

• A bird in the hand

On the Road Again...I just can't wait to not be broke again... The life I love is making funny money with my friends

By Dead_Armadillos, May 3, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

• CBB Welfare Tour

An Asian man laughing at his father's diarrhea is but a slap-happy Jappy with a crappy pappy.

By Dead_Armadillos, May 2, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Losers smoke meth, nerds manipulate Math, but Thoreau humped us all with his unique civil path.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 26, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Welcome to SutherLand! Where the facial hair is charming and the guided tour is short, but educational!

By Dead_Armadillos, April 25, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

I can't believe you talked me into leaving my friends behind back there...And just because they don't dance?!

By Dead_Armadillos, April 25, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but that sweet transition between China Cat Sunflower and I Know You Rider will always make me smile.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 22, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Your friends don't dance and if they don't dance then they ain't not playing pocket pool against the wall at the prom.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 19, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Sucky sucky, $5.00 US. I'll listen to your story about the dream you had last night for a cool $20.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 19, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

The Ol' Glory Hole truck stop... Where the bathroom attendants are a bunch of dicks and the sodapop is colder than room temperature.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 18, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Little bunny Foo-foo, I don't want to see you scooping up all the field mice and asking them if they have time to talk about your lord and savior.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 18, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

It's an animal love story from the chocolate farm...Brown chicken Brown cow

By Dead_Armadillos, April 18, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Your mom's girder is the girder beam in a fabulous Eiffel Tower.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 18, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

You can do anything that you wanna do, just don't step on my brown pleather dress slippers.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 18, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Living la vida loca is no way to live your life at all. Accountability is the name of the game.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 15, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Creedo's creed is Creedence Clearwater Revival's greed gave the world an addiction to speed and a dislike of Creed.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 14, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Don't tell me how to skin a cat in my own kitchen! Now shut the door and hand me the Cool Whip and that weed-eater over there.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 14, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

At first I thought it was prostate cancer, but as it turns out it's just a skinny marink on my dinky dink.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 14, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Said Christopher Robin to his friends, "Let's try one more take of Pooh Bear's maniac face through the splintered door. With feeling!"

By Dead_Armadillos, April 14, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

It's time for everyone's favorite primate rock and roll tribute band, The Poo Fighters!

By Dead_Armadillos, April 14, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

You put your right arm in, you take your right arm out, repeat that a few times and shake it all about. Then, 'Voila!' you made a baby.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 14, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

To make the change you want to see in the world, it's best to get started with a marker and a piece of cardboard.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 12, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

Cut me some slack, Jack. I ain't no hootenannyin' jive turkey with a slap back snack shack.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 12, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

• I speak jive

The moving music of the macabre Macarena makes mere mortals more melancholy.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 12, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions

• Macaroni

Rollerblading in the gravel parking lot at the Grateful Dead show gives me the trippy hippie skates.

By Dead_Armadillos, April 11, 2016 in New Catchphrase Suggestions