EricWeaver

I'm the lean mean dancing machine. Yas queen, I'm Ben Vereen.

There are no stupid questions, but there are cupid questions, like 'Where'd you get dem arrows, lil buddy?'

Ludacris looted the loft for Kris Kross' last Krispy Kreme.

I now know that Bono ate no tripe at Michael Stipe's bonfire tonight.

On the hit show Hoppy Doys, Fanzie's catchphrase was "Ooooooooo!"

Go lick some fudge, you lucky pudge

Koala! Kangaroo! That's not a knife! Shrimp on the barbie! Fosters! Vegemite! No rules just right! Thongs! Coriolis effect! I'M ONE OF YOU NOW.

15 years ago, we had Bob Hope, Johnny Cash, and Steve Jobs. Now we have no hope, no cash, and a Steve Jobs zombie feasting on human brains.

Mandy Patinkin's kin are his ma, pa, and a randy Rin Tin Tin

My favorite Radiohead song is "Karma Chameleon": "Arrest this man / he comes and goes / he comes and goes"

As I see more of Morrissey, I'm less & less likely to lease the mall to Les Paul

A mushroom in my bedroom, a morel in my hotel, and a truffle in my duffle. I guess you'd call me a fun ... person.

You sold your feet to buy me sunglasses? But I sold my eyeballs to buy you roller skates! A classic O'Henry sitch!

Elvis Costello was a hero to most but he never meant shit to Nieve.

I knew You Don't Know Jack. You Don't Know Jack was a friend of mine. Senator, you're no You Don't Know Jack.

Poker in the front, liquor in the back, euchre upstairs, go fish in the basement

Molly Ringwald had a bear / Molly Ringwald had no hair / Molly Ringwald was mauled and bald, y'all

Some consider it rude to call a sexy older woman a "cougar." The preferred term is "Mellencamp."

For it's 1, 2, 3 strikes, you're out at the ol' bowling alley.

According to Mel Gibson, Toydarians are responsible for all the Star Wars in the world.

I've heard of 8 Lyles, but 8 mile?! (Actually, I've only heard of 1 Lyle. Lyle Lovett. I'm sorry I lied to you.)

Sorry I'm late for our date. Blame my Tom Waits-ian gait.

You can show someone where in Michigan you live by pointing at your hand. For example, I live in Infected Hangnailville.

I just flew in on Trump Airlines and boy are my arms fired.

There is no joy in Mudville. Sure, mighty Casey hit a home run, but everybody still lives in friggin' Mudville!