DaltonMaltz

Join guest host Dana Gould (Stan Against Evil) as he sits with comedian and actor Jonah Ray (The Meltdown with Jonah and Kumail, MST3K). Dana and Jonah chat about the humor in online reviews and how creating art that people respond to makes them winners.

Election Bonus Episode with Matt McConkey. Made with love.

Comedy writer Broti Gupta (CollegeHumor, The New Yorker) joins Emily and Deanna to dig up some old receipts. They chat about ditching pre-med for comedy, the death of Vine, and quintessential wine moms. Plus, Broti explains how to use the gibe “delete your account” without hurting any feelings.

This week, comedian Godfrey joins the Sklars to share his take on racism in Chicago public schools and swap some dad-ecdotes. Daniel Van Kirk brings stories about an elderly bank robber with a lame excuse and a man nature is desperately trying to kill. Finally, Randy and Jason listen to a voicemail from friendly TSA agent Michael Kissick about the many people he met during the World Series.

Actor Ricky Mabe joins Jensen and co-host Ali Segel this week to talk about crafting a Jewish grandma, James Franco’s “The Masterpiece,” Shia LaBeouf, Canadian humour, showing up late to a protest, and many other things you should know about.

Hannibal Buress joins Chris on a call with a college freshman who is a lover of comedy struggling to find romance in his life. Should our caller ditch school and try his hand at comedy? Why were Chris and Hannibal crying last night? Is it normal to be aroused by stealing? These questions and many more will be answered.

Here's the scene breakdown for this ep: (3:06 - 25:49) Twitter Suggestion - “Pawn” - Putting on a musical at the height of a pandemic (25:55 - 36:24) Question from Listener - “When has your enthusiasm or passion gotten you into trouble?” - A spooky key fuck party (38:34 - 44:39) Question from Listener - “When is the last time you left a place without going through with an obligation?” - A goodbye spiel makes goodbyes take forever (44:53 - 50:39) Twitter Suggestion/Question from Listener - "When was the last time you lied about having seen a movie or tv show?" - Avoiding engaging in a conversation about guacamole (50:45 - 1:00:43) Crap on Youtube - “Hilarious Road Rage Commentary” - Getting a little too excited about a dog getting caught in a door (1:01:19 - 1:09:36) Question from Listener - “What was your worst online dating experience?” - The gas station attendant that hits on your date (1:09:42 - 1:27:05) Let’s Talk Some More About That - Second City people that left ETC - Magic Tavern offends their fans with their show

Here's the breakdown for this episode: (1:25 - 6:18) Audience Suggestion - Unconstitutional - Extremely passionate military novelist (6:19 - 11:55) Lets Talk Some More About That - Why not run away from an arrow with zig zags? - Building a film scene around a four hundred foot canoe (11:56 - 16:59) Audience Suggestion - Exploit - sharing your summer exploits on the first day of school (17:00 - 21:44) Audience Suggestion - Ladel - Looking for the best silverware to hit your kids with (23:57 - 30:40) Intro Story - Men in pornos know more about masturbation - Watching encouragement porn (30:41 - 35:56) Audience Suggestion - Gerbils - The gerbils tell their basement Exodus (35:57 - 39:14) Audience Suggestion - Placenta - A visit from PlaSanta (39:15 - 44:13) Audience Suggestion - Trash - The garbage truck only comes once a year (44:14 - 51:41) Audience Suggestion - Cyborg - A battle cyborg isn't quite up to the task (51:42 - 58:20) Audience Suggestion - Disney - Classic song humming man (58:21 - 1:05:33) Audience Suggestion - Brownie - Asking the priest to get your parents back together (1:05:34 - 1:09:44) Intro Story - Audience member majored in media studies - Majoring in identifying media (1:09:45 - 1:20:37) Intro Story - What are you going to be when you grow up? - Iceland must be saved by the 13 Santa Clauses

Here's the episode breakdown: (0:08 - 8:40) Intro Story - Breeding dogs for specific purposes - Breeding a poopless peeless dog (9:14 - 23:03) Twitter suggestion - frenemies - Brian meets his nemesis at a memorial patio party (22:09 - 34:50) Question from Listener - Whats the best or worst halloween party experience youve ever had? - Half the Navy Seal team must be tripping balls during a mission (37:10 - 45:18) Crap on Youtube - "Confrontation on Public Bike Path" - A rollerskater faces trouble on bike path trying to get to his therapist (45:26 - 56:01) Question from Listener - "Whats the biggest 'I immediately regret doing this' decision?" - Professor Bong-Hit wont leave the party (56:08 - 1:19:07) Case Closed - Deplorable News vs. Jennifer - Undecided voters are fixated on how the election affects pro wrestling (1:19:39 - 1:24:43) Lets Talk Some More About That - Its always a one-button issue - Going door to door confiscating guns for President Clinton

Here's the breakdown for this episode: (2:22-7:35) Intro Story - Besser’s high school Rocky Horror Picture Show experience - Singing way too fast during a sing-a-long (7:43 - 16:24) Intro Story - A Goofy Movie was inappropriate for Besser’s daughter - Only having experience with kissing the TV (16:48 - 20:21) Audience Suggestion - “Internal Monologue” - Sharing your internal narrative out loud (20:28 - 28:05) Question from Listener - "What’s the worst car accident you’ve been in?" - Catching up an old woman you found in the woods (30:22 - 36:10) Question from Listener - “What was the worst Halloween costume you ever wore?” - Reusing Hunger Games’ Katniss cleavage for future Halloween costumes (36:14 - 43:36) Audience Suggestion - “Galaxy Note 7” - Making the magic really easy for the magician (46:04 - 52:40) Intro Story - Are the performers Millennials or Gen X? - Proving what generation you belong to through cultural references (52:47 - 59:07) Audience Suggestion - “Stone” - All Matt’s stories come down to rocks (59:14 - 1:04:15) Question from Listener - “Is there a word or lyric that you always thought you were saying right until someone corrected you?” - Sending your crying soldier off to war (1:04:28 - 1:09:48) Audience Suggestion - “Pumpkin Pancakes” - Cookies get in the way of finding the New World (1:09:50 - 1:21:50) Intro Story - Who in the audience is from furthest away? - Interruptions change the context of conversation

Here's the breakdown for this episode: (0:31-12:27) "Midwestern Guys" - Was Lydia dating an artist? - An artist is picky about getting inspiration out of his muse (12:28 - 23:32) Let's Talk Some More About That Song - What happened in 1983? - Girlfriend doesn't know enough about public enemy (26:22 - 39:28) "Same to You" - Picking up the pieces and moving on - Therapist uses his own relationship to help his patients (39:29 - 45:26) Let's Talk Some More About That Song - "I can tell by the color of your face you're mad" - People can tell everything about Dan by his face (46:09 - 55:51 ) "European" - Meeting the most European person in the room (56:07 - 1:03:03) Let's Talk Some More About That Song - Where did these specific lyrics come from? - Sharing secrets down the alley (1:03:20 - 1:10:34) "Clumps" - Besser bought some old half and half - Maggot Meat doesn't accept product return (1:10:51 - 1:18:55) Let's Talk Some More About That Song - Love turns into lust - Pamela feels every emotion about her boyfriend

Here's the scene breakdown for this episode: - (1:10) “Piano Man” - A man pursues an affair with his alcoholic beverage - (6:16) “Piano Man” #2 – Trying to dress hip and youthful for your son’s bachelor party - (12:26) “Down Under” – Paul meets some oddly-accented Australians - (16:49) “Down Under” #2 – A very tall man is sensitive about his measurements - (21:15) “Sweet Baby James”– Lonely cowboys bother each other with music - (26:03) “Sweet Baby James” #2 - Captain Sully’s brother seeks danger to compete with his sibling’s success - (37:16) “Harvest” - Mom values joy in the rain over her own health - (43:52) “The Gambler” - Hanging out with a sponge-haired girl on a train - (48:51) “The Gambler” #2 - A gambler gets very pushy about drinking your whiskey - (52:23) “The Gambler” #3 - Kenny Rogers outlines his plan to fold the cards on life - (57:54) “Riders on the Storm” - Storm-riding is all the rage amongst teens - (1:04:06) “Riders on the Storm” #2 - Picking up a murderous hitchhiker just to have a little more fun - (1:10:49) “Maggie May” - Taking cutlery a little more seriously - (1:19:50) “Daniel” - When your boss wants to skype you while you’re away at college

It was cut. Look up "Officer David Carter" if you want to know more. They made the call back, but it was a dead line.