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If you thought Kim K's Aaliyah costume was in poor taste, you should've seen Kanye's R Kelly outfit.

My job doesn't provide traditional benefits, but there's one big perk to being a human dummy for a ventriloquist.

I may be ostracized for being ostrich-sized, but I'm no loon, so don't be a dodo or I'll get owly. Nailed it.

I haven't listened to the episode yet, but there's a lot to be excited about. I'm cautiously optimistic that The National will join Tiny and Victor in a rendition of "Under the Apple Tree".

I will eat raisins plain. I will eat raisins in trail mix. I will not eat raisins in cookies. I'm all about societal integration, but when it comes to food, these should not mix. Just like taco pizza.

I'll tell you what else I got by switching to Geico. Hepatitis B.

If you give a cookie to that hairy Wookie, you might get nookie from that sleazy Snookie.

Maybe that's the biggest knock against The Snowman. People had higher hopes with Fassbender and some other legit actors attached and it failed so miserably. The more I read about it, the more I want to see it. Maybe the crew can do a weather-themed back-to-back episode with these two pieces of garbage.

Ha! If that's not career damnation, I don't know what is. Amazing that this movie is somehow faring better on Rotten Tomatoes than Fassbender's The Snowman. We're talking 11% vs. 8%, but I'm trying to at least give it some credit.

What's the biggest issue with this film? Was it the rough production? Warner Bros., Skydance's 'Geostorm' Undergoes Reshoots, Brings on Jerry Bruckheimer http://www.hollywood...ckheimer-866329 Or was it the science? Geostorm's Weather Control Tech Is Exceptionally Bogus, Scientists Explain https://gizmodo.com/...ogus-1819783644

My hypothesis is that today's biggest fake news spreaders are the guys who used to lie about their dick size on AOL instant messenger.

Just watched this again last night. It's absurd. If ever you've longed for a movie with "space herpes", this is it! The time-travel paradox part of the film is amazingly bad. I mean, a robot gets nervous and diarrheas oil and bolts! Unicorns! Lobotomies and castration! Bruce Vilanch! A jive-talking robot pimp!

I listen to a lot of music and have a very eclectic collection on my iPhone. I very much listen to certain music depending on what I'm doing, but there are some artists I still find myself gravitating towards, especially if I haven't listened to them in a while. Top 10 is harder than my top 5: The National, TV on the Radio, Eluvium, Bon Iver, Godspeed! You Black Emperor. Pink Floyd is definitely one I'll dig up whenever I can't decide on something else. My dad listened to Dark Side of the Moon a lot when I was a kid, and it has stuck with me. For the surprises that creep towards the top, I'd have to say Joy Division, Brian Eno...and Iron Maiden.

If you're one saying "there are too many people on this planet", you'll quickly change your tune when global food shortages prevail.

Virginia is for lovers, and Florida is for mindless zombies unfit for civilized society.

I think I might have to actually figure out the movie first. He asks a lot of questions, and I'm not sure I could answer any of them.

I showed my then 4-year old The NeverEnding Story. He was kind of into it (which means he wasn't, because he gets super into just about anything), then proceeded to fall asleep on me. I watched the rest of the film without him.

Those are fantastic choices. My kids love "Ghostbusters". My 5-year old son has been introduced to Queen's "Who Wants to Live Forever" and will watch it over and over on YouTube. Maybe I should just let him watch Highlander?

Now that October is over, men can finally stop thinking about women's sweet, sweet breasts for 11 months.

Instead of an IQ test, the President could show intelligence by explaining why the letter "w" isn't instead "double v".

They Call Me Bruce? Full movie available on YouTube. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/They_Call_Me_Bruce%3F The movie opens with a young boy running to meet his grandfather (played by Yune), who lies dying on his bed. The young boy sadly explains that he could not find the medicine required to cure his grandfather's ailment and wonders aloud who will take care of him after his grandfather dies. His dying grandfather attempts to reassure the young boy, and explains that he should go to America. He further explains that when he was younger and working as a merchant marine, he met "the most beautiful girl" in America, and tells the young boy that if he goes there, she will take very good care of him. As the young boy is asking how to find her, his grandfather dies and the movie fades to black. When it fades back in, quite some time has passed and the young boy, who is now an adult, has arrived in America and has begun working as a chef, catering to some gangsters in California. The gangsters, who call the man "Bruce" for his resemblance to the famed martial artist, Bruce Lee, are having trouble keeping their "boss of bosses" happy, and are trying to come up with the perfect solution to distributing cocaine to all of their clients throughout the United States. Some previous attempts at moving the drug have resulted in busts, and the boss of bosses is not happy. Through a series of misunderstandings, Bruce makes it into the local newspaper as a hero, having thwarted an attempted robbery at the local market. Bruce's boss, Lil Pete, sees the newspaper and quickly devises a plan putting Bruce in control of moving the cocaine across the country, using Freddy, a stooge associated with the drug lords, as Bruce's limousine chauffeur. He convinces Bruce (who already wants to go to New York to find the lady his grandfather spoke of) that he should drive to New York, not fly, as flying would rob him of seeing the beautiful countryside. Bruce agrees and the rest of the movie follows an unknowing Bruce delivering what he thinks to be flour to associates of the gangsters across the country, and the interactions he has with the people on this trip.

Anyone recommending this movie because they think "it's bad" is an asshole and should engage in heavy self reflection.

Pontius Pilate punched his pilot prior to a penultimate pit-stop in the Port of Portugal. What a prick that guy was.