Pugfugly Ate He Fore

On the first day of the week they found the stone rolled away, but when they entered, they did not find the body of the Lord Jesus, but the floor looked immaculate. Jesus swept.

If you can't take my Comedy at it's Bang, you don't deserve it at it's Bang.

Stop Eating Bees? More like "Scott Eating Deez," amiright?

Please, call me Daddy. "Dad" was my father.

CBB BUMP!

CBB BUMP!

NO! I said I love "CUNNING LINGUISTS!" Pull you pants back up.

What would you do if I squeezed out a two? Would you squat down and drop one on me?

CBB BUMP!

George and Ringo playing bingo. Where's Paul gone? He's on the John.

CBB BUMP!

CBB BUMP!

I'd like to buy the world a Coke, but they only carry Pepsi products at this Arby's. Sucks to be you, world.

CBB BUMP!

We named the DOG Indiana, and the pussy Virginia.

CBB BUMP!

And if I die before I wake, I pray the Lord will feed my snake. He gets one frozen mouse a week, Lord.

CBB BUMP!

I charge candy for a handy, but give rimmy on a whimmy.

CBB BUMP!

I may have gotten pec implants in the Australian Outback, but these abs are original.

CBB BUMP!

Only my Mom is allowed to visit my apartment building. You could say it's a bit of an Oedipus Complex.

It’s really weird that I learned about Lyme Disease from The Real World: Seattle.

CBB BUMP!