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MondoMudbutt

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Everything posted by MondoMudbutt

  1. MondoMudbutt
    Obama supposedly incites tricycle wars that ravage children’s playgrounds and local parents are unsure whether their children will ever be safe, tonight on Fox News.
  2. MondoMudbutt
    Yoga notes and Whole foods totes. Welcome to the simulation.
  3. MondoMudbutt
    The denim chicken ended up working for Lee Dungarees long before Jerome Bettis made a deal with the salmon filet who took my brother’s virginity.
  4. MondoMudbutt
    The #1 selling eye cream in the world has been named the #1 selling eye cream in the world in the competition to find the #1 selling eye cream in the world
  5. MondoMudbutt
    Contact the landlord about the rat infestation and he may just take you out to meet The General. And for the best car insurance rates online, go to The General and save some time.
  6. MondoMudbutt
    My protein intake has no equivalent. Gains on gains on gains. So the question is, do you even know how to swim, you sexy piece of shit?
  7. MondoMudbutt
    Take that watermelon and shove it up your butt, you snarky little squirrel. This ain’t no place for you and you don’t want to part of this.
  8. MondoMudbutt
    Here at the Icee factory, we want you to tell us what you think of the new Rotten Lobster Smegma Slushee.
  9. MondoMudbutt
    It most certainly was not me who slipped into your bed and playfully fed you mayonnaise butter cheese on Christmas Eve. Wait, I take that back. It was me.
  10. MondoMudbutt
    Save $5 when you purchase life insurance through 7-11, now through Memorial Day Weekend at Five Guys Burgers and Fries.
  11. MondoMudbutt
    The dog will inevitably hump you if you’ve ever touched your penis. Just the thought of it gets him harder than a brick wall.
  12. MondoMudbutt
    You have a new bill from Bank of America, Scott. Please call customer service at your earliest convenience.
  13. MondoMudbutt
    I’m feeling extraordinarily confident about our familial goal of building a skyscraper made of Nacho Cheese Doritos and KY Jelly Ladyfingers.
  14. MondoMudbutt
    An elderly man farted on me while riding the train. I subsequently came.
  15. MondoMudbutt
    No no, I’m good. I extract my own fish oil from my girlfriend on a nightly basis.
  16. MondoMudbutt
    Where is the highlighter? Where did it go? Is it in a place, that nobody knows? Is it over here? Is it over there? Is it lodged in the ferrets dreaded asshole hairs? Probably.
  17. MondoMudbutt
    Just check the mailbox. I know I put your dead rat in their yesterday, but someone may have stolen it since then, as I did put up billboards advertising it was there.
  18. MondoMudbutt
    The meat must be seasoned before putting it back in the camel carcass. Have I made myself Visine Clear you daft panini head?
  19. MondoMudbutt
    Take it down a notch, Hot Rod. Theres no need to heat that asshole of yours up to extreme levels again.
  20. MondoMudbutt
    If you knew me, you'd definitely know me. Wait, do you know me? Are you my brother, Wilt Chamberlain?
  21. MondoMudbutt

    MondoMudbutt replied to MondoMudbutt's topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    Honey comb butt plugs from David Beckham for sale at Best Buy this Saturday. Don't miss out!
  22. MondoMudbutt
    He really didn't mean to. He just accidentally gave me the roofie, instead of the jolly rancher.
  23. MondoMudbutt
    After the boy slipped on the banana peel for the 67th consecutive time, he realized he'd fallen into an infinite loop.
  24. MondoMudbutt
    I'm just saying from personal experience, they should make 100% pure steel toilet paper. The overhead light sang sweet lullabies to the frog that had just hopped in through the aged kitty door. God was in fact, not there.
  25. MondoMudbutt
    Drill the wood. Drill it good. Drill it Ron Jeremy. Just like you should.
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