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11
Posts posted by Call Waiting for Godot
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Some say the world will end in fire. Some say in ice. But I say: cover my balls in sugar and spice.
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Hickory dickory duck, your mother made me her cuck.
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Good mornin' starshine, the earth says, "Help me, I'm fucking dying!"
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Apparently they wanted a dozen bagels, & NOT "a dozen Kegels". My coworkers are pissed, but on the bright side, my pelvic floor is fit as hell.
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Dracula stumbled upon goiter porn, and suddenly, it was his darkest craving of all.
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Forgive me for getting all political here, but William Henry Harrison is a lame-ass piece of shit!!!!! #NOTMYPRESIDENT
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In a cruel twist of fate, Men Without Hats' "The Safety Dance" played as the men without hats suffered cerebral hemorrhages.
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"Sea of Tranquility" my ass: that's where I fought my first race war!
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Sorry Seattle, but the only "Space Needle" that interests me was jammed inside Buzz Aldrin's veins as he rode that dragon through cosmic infinity.
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Occasions for acquiescence do arise, when even our heroes have poop running down their thighs.
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A little foot nibble makes me dribble!
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"Prostate schmostate!" cried the Doctor. "I've got your icky poo-poo all over me, mister!"
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People say I'm "artsy fartsy" but really I'm more "artsy diarrhea"
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A Black-Capped Chickadee landed on me, and I said "Shoo! Can't you see I'm blue cause you gave me deadly Bird Flu?"
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Gruel's PR people had better get it the fuck together.
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That's no moon... that's the sun, son, and if you keep staring into it, you're gonna go blind!
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Every building block of life is slimy, and believe me, pal, I've got enough slime in my pocket to colonize the moon.
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Yowza! Buddy's Bunghole Bunglers gone 'n done it again!
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Holy moly! Moles with ebola often elope to Angola!
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The best in A-lister pus accumulations & B-lister blisters... this is Abscess Hollywood!
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I'm a fancy boy with fancy toys, and if you squeeze my buns I'll make a fancy noise!
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Why accept climate change when you can have climate dolla dolla billz, y'all?
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A pound of flesh for David Koresh!
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