marblaven

Teach a man to fish, he'll eat for a day. Give a man a peanut allergy and he'll never eat a peanut again

Thank you for always being there. And when I need you over there, thank you for always being there. And when I need you over there, thank you for always being there​.

These targeted ads for single dads will help you beat the heat and, more importantly, your meat

Step 1: Hire a lawyer, step 2: go to a shrink, step 3: kill the lawyer, marry the shrink, and wash the blood off in the sink