LieutenantGeneralAnesthesia

Listen up, I’m only gonna say this once, motherfuckers: “Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang.”

Champagne for my real friends. Real pain for my sham friends. T-Pain for my hip friends. Hip pain for my tea friends. Girl pain for my man friends. Mansplain for my girlfriends.

Mofos holla back, mufos follow back, my hos swallow back.

The doctor is the boy’s mother, the kiddo is the boy’s widow, the sexist is the boy’s breakfast.

One for the money, two for the show, but “three-peat” is a clumsy sportmanteau.

“Cowboy Sans Sheriff” for Dalton’s book font feels like a missed opportunity.

I like how Conan used the word “cycular” at 24:33. Not “cyclical,” not “circular,” but “cycular.” Well job, Conan, good done! Matt, Sona, and D’Arcy: excellent word choice throughout.

SCREW your courage, toothy stinkin’-face!

This is how the world ends: not with a Bang Bang, but with a whimper whimper!

Consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds. Fantasy is the orc of little dorks.

The Word on Google Street View is that I Excel in Google Sheets, too!

Liam Neeson’s next revenge? More like Brendan Gleeson’s Netflix binge!

You are my sunshine. I am your father. We can rule the galaxy as father and sunshine!

Feed a cold, starve a fever, give a heart attack a healthy snack.

Snitches get stitches, and a stitch in time saves nine, so shut up and mend that ski mask of mine!