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Catfish

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  1. Catfish

    Cats for virtual Live Episode

    At the end, as the Jellicles watch J-Hud float away and just when I start feeling for the “exit” button on my remote control, the Dench Cat starts up ANOTHER three minute song about cats. In this one she sings directly to the audience with great sincerity to summarize all we have learned about the world of cats and to impart this final piece of wisdom… “So first, your memory I'll jog, and say: A CAT IS NOT A DOG.” All Jellicle’s refrain: “So first, your memory I'll jog, and say: A CAT IS NOT A DOG.” Yeah, no shit Dame Deuteronomy. Is this the moral of the story?!?!? Hearing this line (TWICE) almost ended me. This movie is so stupid.
  2. Catfish

    Ep 250 — Under the Cherry Moon

    It’s jarring how quickly this movie goes from throwback “Martin-and-Lewis”-esque romantic caper to “Ripped from the Headlines” reminder of systemic racism at the end. I mean, Christopher was straight up ASSASSINATED by a uniformed officer! Shot in the back, and he was not even fleeing law enforcement...just running to his lover. Granted there were no body-cams in in 1986, but I hope there was at least a grand jury investigation into Christopher’s murder. I’m certain I’m not the only one who initially thought his death was really just some scheme he devised to make off with the girl (you now, bullet proof vest, ketchup in the mouth, etc, etc, then show up on the beach with the girl in the final reveal), but in the end, I’m kinda glad his character did die because the Prince and the Revolution song played from Heaven is probably the best part of the movie.
  3. Catfish

    3rd Annual(?) Howdies

    Worst Philosophical Conversation Taking Place Over a Complete-Shit Game of Chess. Some one would have to do the research on this one, but there must be a handful of these.
  4. Catfish

    Ep. 249 — Deadly Mile High Club

    Yeah, I doubt if Bezos is sulking around saying, "I can't believe I still work in the shipping department."
  5. Catfish

    Ep. 249 — Deadly Mile High Club

    On second thought, maybe no one has ever really jumped off that building and it's just Tanya's go-to dumping ground for loose ends. Tanya: "What do you mean I can't return this telescopic lens without a receipt?" Clerk: "Sorry m'am, store policy. Tanya: "Fine. By the way, I need to make a delivery. How would you like a free flight to Santa Barbara?" Who knows how many people she has killed. Also, "A free trip to Santa Barbara" is a good euphemism for knocking someone off.
  6. Catfish

    Ep. 249 — Deadly Mile High Club

    There are so many things to discuss about this movie!!! In the beginning I thought we were entering a 2:22 scenario. When Tonya was flipping back and forth between photos of “The Two Jakes”, I was thinking, uh-oh..we have a young man, involved in aviation, getting mixed up in some kind of soul-switching scenario. But of course that’s something only a crazy person would think…a la Tanya. Also the guy that Jake buys the plane from at the end of the movie says, “we moved around a lot when we were kids, so its kinda like a family home”. Are we to believe that his family was flying around from town to to town in a WWII era aircraft, picking up odd jobs, getting into adventures, and sleeping in the cockpit. THIS NEEDS TO BE THE MOVIE. Lastly the guy from the coroner’s office tells hard-pink that, “Apparently, a lot of people jump off that building.” What?!?! How many?!?! What does it take before some security measures are put in place?
  7. Catfish

    Ep. 249 — Deadly Mile High Club

    The scenes with Pink Fedora’s neighbor, Lindsey, must be setting up a Lifetime shared universe in which the next movie will be titled “Deadly Observation: I Married a Stalker”. Not only has her husband disabled the motion sensor on the Ring camera so that he can record *everything*, he also has some kind of Dark Web site access on his laptop that allows you to immediately look up someone’s address based on a license plate number. THIS GUY IS UP TO SOMETHING! Also of note, the Ring camera footage of the models arriving at the house shows four or five workers on the roof right next door. I guess they got a really good show on the day of the steamy backyard aerial photo shoot.
  8. Catfish

    Episode 248 Velocipastor

  9. Catfish

    Episode 248 Velocipastor

    I want to make fun of The VelociPastor, but I’m frozen, like Papa Doc trying to battle B-Rabbit at the end of 8 Mile. This movie preemptively acknowledges all of its own stupid shit, so there is nothing left to find fault with. I can see why Paul, June and Jason spent so much time hilariously discussing sauna burritos, 10-Step programs, and Tik-Tok MD.
  10. Catfish

    Episode 247 - 2:22 (Live in Portland)

    At the very end of the movie, which takes place 10 months to a year later, Dylan checks his watch and says out loud, ’11 o’clock…no plane”. So we can assume that every single day for the past year he checks for the occurrence of each premonition from the Grand Central Station incident. I’d love to see a bunch of shots of Sarah showering or trying to get some work done, etc and Dylan popping in to say “Hey Honey, 9:15 and no drip!”, or Dylan: “Hear that, Sarah’. Sarah: ”What, I don’t hear anything” Dylan: “Exactly! No tires screeching!” Sarah: [Rolls her eyes and shakes her head] In the end, it seems that the whole first part of the movie *is* about a man suffering from mental illness and the last scene shows how Dylan is now coping with his issues using medication and some kind of affirmation therapy…’11:00…no plane”
  11. Catfish

    Episode 247 - 2:22 (Live in Portland)

    I love the idea that, according to Paul, the script that Armie Hammer read said something like, “Dylan watches the aerial silks ballet, but it’s not that good”, and that is what causes him to turn down the part.
  12. Catfish

    Episode #245 - Money Plane

    Oh my god...IMDB has this listed as a sequel to Money Train! Let's hear how these movies are connected
  13. Catfish

    Episode #245 - Money Plane

    Worst heist crew ever. Manbun is as inept at being a father as he is a criminal. He keeps his loaded gun in an unlocked bedside drawer that is about 16 inches from the floor. Perfect height for, I don't know, a 10 year old girl to stumble across. Did not see any trigger lock on that bad boy either. Regarding the criminal ineptitude of the team in general, Grouch and Manbun agree that "Taking down the house" on the Money Plane is a near impossible task that will require perfect planning and execution. Then Manbun meets with his team to discuss the heist plan for the better part of 3 minutes! During the heist, the guy who bitches and moans about being ground support shows up with what looks like a bunch of old junk he hasn't used in years and a rat's nest of tangled cords. And their final plan to "Manually distribute" the cash to people who need it is to throw it all out of the plane, including one wrapped block of bills that must weigh 30 pounds, all of which will either land in the ocean or likely kill someone on the ground. Speaking of...In spite of their general goofiness, they are pretty quick to violently murder people in the way as part of their MO. Makes me wonder about their other capers, robbing museums and such. Do they brutally kill the poor security guards who are just doing their jobs. Maybe they deserve a seat at the table on the MONEY PLANE!!! (Sequel Idea) Also have to call out the $14 dollar lava lamp on the bar of the most exclusive high-rollers room in the entire world.
  14. Catfish

    Episode 243.5 - Prequel to Episode 244

    One more comment about the PBS...The Signor was able to get the paintbrush factory up and running so fast because it seems he has done this before. There is that one corridor in his factory that is completely lined with silver/grey hair. So I think he must have had someone else in captivity who was also exposed to the Fright/PB-solution (a wife perhaps, yikes!!!) and was using that person’s hair in the manufacture of some sort of insulation paneling. Maybe he is running both businesses concurrently under some conglomerate name (Signor Industries and Textiles). Too bad they never made the prequel, sequel, or parallequel.
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