Dunky Fumps

I swipe right if you wipe til white.

It’s My Fair Lady in the streets, “It’s my fair, lady - I’m going to stick this lance up your fat ass” at my family’s jousting tournament.

See which of these seven hunks can furthest fling their dinger strings...TONIGHT on Carrot Top’s Beat Off Skeet Off

Would you rather: start typing the greatest WYR in history, suddenly realize that you were entering it in the wrong spot, and go to Twitter to post it in the correct location OR just hit “submit topic” because fuck it all anyways?

Jingle Bells/Batman spells...everything phonetically because he never progressed past a third grade reading level, once again illustrating the importance of reading to your children regularly through adolescence. Whoever Batman’s parents are should be ASHAMED of themselves.

Is it just me, or does everybody’s Social Security number start with 298-30-3445?

See Spurs star Matt Bonner’s mattress boner tonight on “Celebrity Peep In While They Sleepin’”

Let’s eat grandmas, pussy. Punctuation matters.

“Fine Young Cannibals - Tonight only!” I’m sorry, that’s “Fine, young cannibals. Toe night, only!”

Wicked Mickey roofied Goofy

My neck, my back, my...”Puss In Boots 2: 9 Lives and 40 Thieves” reported production delays were whack.

Beep beep! Who got the keys to my chastity device?

Surprised but honored to see today’s “Learn Spanish One Word Per Day” lesson trending on Twitter. #nomeansno

Piss, poop, puke, cum/I smell Salacious Crumb

Red Rover, Red Rover, bend Grover on over.