ChaseRoper

She wanted to know what my long term goals were. You think I'd be podcasting as a stay at home dad if I had planned goals in my life?

Oh hey, it's Friday the 13th. Watch out all you friggatriskaidekaphobiacs!

"I didn't forget to shave all week. I consciously decided to grow a beard." - thing I convinced myself just now.

Want to know how you can really help a family with a special needs child? Offer to babysit for a few hours so mom (OR DAD) can get out of the house and let his/her brain cool down.

Overheard: a conversation with my boys' music teacher - Music Teacher: Your boys score higher than most of... http://t.co/XKCheLQo

Drunk ping pong http://t.co/r5rVr18z

I'm probably not going to post anything on twitter today you guys.

I'm just going to open Final Draft and start writing specs/treatments for reality shows based on every possible kind of occupation, hobby, or culture and pitch all of them.

I don't like that @twitter is promoting The Rapists on my who to follow list.

Ep22 - Which Charities Should You Support? http://t.co/ExyvVcqK

And on the 8th day, God said, "All things shall fix themselves by turning off their power, waiting one minute, and turning it back on."

My Klout score fell again. The whole world IS A LIE!

.@eddiepepitone just showed up on House. This bad day is turning around.

"It's been fun getting to know Ted Nugent. He's the right height." - Mitt Romney

A new @IFC clip from @ComedyBangBang w/ @ScottAukerman and Zach Galifianakis Video: http://t.co/SpQA8hYY

Join @Kiva: Get $25 free trial and help alleviate poverty. http://t.co/ZxjBKm1w via @Kiva - This is a FANTASTIC idea. Make difference.

Dick Clark was alive?

What is this, Paranormal Activity 4!?: http://t.co/V8aFGPsI

I'm trolling fro podcast guests. Interested in talking for 15 min on the phone sometime with me? Hit me up!

My wife is walking with March of Dimes to raise money for sick babies. Please make a pledge. Every little bit helps. http://t.co/XajrerML

Less of these kinds RT: @moo9 @ChaseRoper " privacy " http://t.co/65jgMQA4 great

Happy 4/20 everybody! I'm a grown man with children and have no idea how to acquire or ingest marijuana. But for those of you who do, enjoy skirting your responsibilties today! I mean, drugs are bad kids!

I'm not allowed to announce that my Nielsen box will be set for 8 visitors during @PFTompkins' special http://t.co/S2vrimxF

NO CREAMER.

Did Kony leave candy under anyone's pillow last night? #kony21012 #konycandy