ChaseRoper

Good news parents! It's never too early to get your daughters ready for the pole! http://t.co/DmWxSKuT

From the capt'n's seat. A whole lotta hood. http://t.co/RTj2wcMW

Plankton, which do you want? World domination. Or a Krabby Patty. I feel like your goals are kind of all over the place.

Working on a script for Normal Activity. About a guy falling asleep with his web cam on by mistake. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

Trying to decide whether or not I should look up and follow all of the Storage Wars guys. I'll wrestle w/ this the rest of the day.

It's parent abuse, right? // @momsatwork No, single parenting is not child abuse.

Have any news networks reached out to Fred Savage to see what he thinks of homosexuals yet?

I am hosting a show on Yowie. Come chat with me! http://t.co/GmstQ6m2

Told my 12yo I wanted to start a fudge shoppe called "Around the Corner." Then had to teach him the "milk, milk, lemonade" thing #parentfail

"people are idiots." - House RT @TeamDoJoe "@jjauthor: Today is a great day to annoy a Liberal. Work hard. Succeed. Be happy."@seanhannity

Watching Storage Wars

I live where shit get dumped on the road. http://t.co/vLkxuoXp

Not Without My Dayghter - I can’t sleep. My 5yo starts kindergarten tomorrow. I feel as though my whole life... http://t.co/00VjjFNZ

Anonymous asked: I would like to donate to the cause. The process on Kickstarter did not work for me. Gift... http://t.co/bIZsB7zD

Also, Ghoulies. RT @JohnRossBowie: The thing I miss the most about 80s movies is the "punk rocker with a switchblade" character.

Just made my daughter a bubble bath with Dawn dish soap. Is this bad? I feel like my wife would hate this.

Let's hear it for 300% mark up! // @Kobeys #yuup @davethemogul will be at Kobeys this weekendWe're open from 7-3pm!!! #sandiego

Each day I get a little bit closer to calling @jakefogelnest.

god DAMMIT! // @jamiedenbo Don't forget to change your clocks back on Sat night! (the night where all parents collectively go "AW COME ON!")

My live web-a-thon is a wrap! Raised another $5 towards The Stay at Home Dadcast and had a great time. If you tuned in, I thanked you at the end of the show! Now I'm going to go get the bathroom cleaned like I promised.

Ok, everybody, SSHHHHH! // @marcmaron Okay, seriously, I'm napping now. So, all of you shut the fuck up or take somewhere else.

Did Santorum win NASCAR?

Catch my chat with @JohnRossBowie on the new Stay at Home Dadcast: http://t.co/5q1udPZg

Turns out my 12yo's cold is really mono. In hindsight, I probably shouldn't have made out with him so much.

Come join the Stay at Home Dadcast web-a-thon live at @Yowie right now! Check my previous tweeds for te link.