Henry

All chewy sprees are sprees, but not all sprees are chewy sprees. Hayes tried to correct engineer Josh's chewing gum knowledge and ended up epic failing on so many levels!

If there is a forumist named "dry ketchup wine" then I think I've nailed it. I'll accept my prize in the form of either cash or high fives. I'll also accept mid level fives. I'm too slow for down low fives.

I'd almost call it boring and rude. I won't though because that's not the kind of guy I am, and I'm also afraid of confrontation

Wanna know something? It's a fact: Chris Hardwick mentions Harry Potter on an average of 6.9 times within any given week of episodes of @midnight. It's true, he's a total nude! It's a fact. Criterion Collection bonus commentary: Man, I had a blast making this post. First off, paying homage to the "it's a fact" girl from Kids in the Hall was just a huge privilege. Then there's that reference to the "Nudi St. Col. o' NY" ad from this week's episode that I really had a lot of fun with. I think I really raised some very valid questions with this piece as well, mostly "Hey, Chris. Why so much Harry Potter? We already see that Darth Vader neck tie you're wearing, you're obviously a huge nerd!" Some sharp eyed readers may notice that the figures are not completely accurate, well, here's a little secret. 6.9 is itself a little joke because you take the decimal out, and what do you get? 69. That's right, a 69 joke hidden right in plain view

It's tomato meter rating is up there with the likes of Apollo 13

Sure, but I take it your brain is made of plants! I'll go ahead and drop this mic so I can hand you some aloe to put on that burn Edit: it kind of took me a while to think of that so I didn't notice Chanson had already defended himself

Did it, and I'm OK. Sorry if I kept anyone worrying. I'm fine. I came to the realization that Obama must have put a sensor machine bug in my head and now I'm gonna get that bugger out! I'll start by really digging hard with my fingernails, and if that doesn't work I'll go see a doctor. Thanks for your well wishes. edit: Whoops, nope. The panic wore off and my wife calmed me down and told me not to try to dig into my scalp. It was all just a fun coincidence! Lol

I'm super freaked out because I just posted a comment about my experience watching "The Jungle Book" and now this is posted with a video titled "JUNGLE BOOK?". There was literally only 8 minutes between our posts. And as I'm typing this I'm hearing " any of you guys seen the jungle book?". This is too much. I need time to process some stuff

So I just saw "The Jungle Book" and it was a lot better than I'd expected. I especially got a kick out of the last scene where... I was like "Uh, yeah. I could too!" Seriously though, I liked it

My dad makes fun of me because he says I don't hang out with cool guys when I get internet time (he's a total jock). Wait until he gets a load of this! Thanks Cargo, and suck it, dad!

i thought the forum was kind of neat... I don't mean to disagree with established forum bigwigs, but I'm a bit of a risk taker and a bad boy (I was hoping this was gonna be the moment that I'd get something like "I like your moxie, kid" and i'd get made as a legit forum cool guy)

You probably just missed

Yeah right, you ever hear of a birthday called "December 25th"? It may have killed more people than all wars combined, but it also made people get a lot of presents.

I used to pull the same trick that Sean's pee machine does because I loved the taste of grape Dimetapp so much. Now that I'm a grown up I can have all I want and my parents can't tell me I already had enough

I just wrote another joke that was inspired by a relatively irrelevant moment in this episode. It's in the style of Popsicle stick riddles/Laffy Taffy Q: Why did Indiana Jones go to church? A: Because it was Indy Penance day

It's not "Smo King". Get your famous movie quotes straight. Other than that, great job @ Alison!

I don't have any pictures of my D available, but here's a picture of me with someone I used to work with who was like a D to me

Todd is great in "The Characters". My only complaint is that while I was laughing I accidentally folded my belly weird.

I'd been looking for that Tom Waits plugs theme! I forgot who submitted it and what episode it was from. I saw Tom Waits perform live years ago in Seattle. I had an extra ticket so I took a beloved family friend along who is himself a musician. He grew up in L.A. in the 60s and claims to have gone to a music festival where Tiny Tim, Blue Cheer, and Janis Joplin performed. Blue Cheer was apparently so loud that "the sky cracked open." (Also he was on acid). He still says that the concert we went to was the weirdest and greatest concert he'd ever attended.

It might be possible if we were to break it down into smaller categories and collate the results. Who's stronger, who's nicer, who's cooler, who's a faster runner, whose dad could beat up whose dad, who can count the highest, who can stay up the latest, who has the best favorite color, etc... Personally though, the idea is a little scary

I rarely go a week or two without giving Fire of Love another listen, quite possibly a perfect album! One time a silly person told me that Jack on Fire sounded like a ripoff of the Pixies, and boy did I grow an inch or two in height when I showed off my musical intelligence by explaining that this album came out 6 years before the Pixies' first album.

Hey guys, I just got a call from the police that said my internet was hacked and they also said that anything that I appeared to have said wasn't actually me. Be careful out there

Well, I'm a total nerd so I recognize that the first guy is comic books, but who's that black guy?..... Uhh, I mean just "guy". I can't tell what race he is because I see the entire world as one beautiful blonde haired, blue eyed race like me.....no, that's just making things even worse now..... Um..... Got it! *ahem* Hey everyone, I'm actually a bad guy who hacked into this person's computer or something by using an illegal internet program, and I'm really the one who's been typing this not him. He's a really nice and cool guy so if I was tricked into saying anything that conflicts with stuff he previously said just ignore it ok?

Aww jeez, I always do this to myself. Now I'm so embarrassed! You know, it's not about who's better, who's not better, who's full blown blind, or who's blind in a really cool progressive way. I mean, sure, my eyes do work so from a genetic point of view I am technically "better" or whatever, but that's not important to me. I'm just glad my story is helping people. Stay fresh, and have a cool summer!

I'm actually race blind so I love all people. Some think of it as a disability and feel sorry for me, but you know what, I kind of think it's beautiful. Also, I guess I'm pretty brave for admitting this in a public forum, and so that means I've inspired some people