PlanBFromOuterSpace

I guess my mind goes more towards "somebody's going to end up dying in the trunk of a car" than simply the old wife telling the new one to suck it.

When I read all these "Letter from the wife" posts, I keep hearing that Dido interlude in my head...

If I remember correctly (and I may not, as I'm pretty sure that I just made this up), this was the most awkward Carnac segment ever... #AskYourGrandparents

I'd like to believe that they had no idea that a camera was there...and that Cage still does his grocery shopping this way.

Sorry, it seems I'm on a bit of a Van Damme KICK tonight and Bolo is one of my trigger words...

Don't you mean a dance...FACE/Off? Anyway...

I just feel obligated to do this...

All this negativity, and it's not even a live show!

I suppose that's true, kind of like how tits were the about the LEAST memorable thing in "Showgirls". In fact, I think the edited-for-TV version is infinitely more entertaining...mostly for the hilarious covering up of tits.

I'm trying to think of other examples, but this is one of those movies where the trailer was excellent and set up a mystery that you thought would be unraveled as the movie went on, but it gets dropped somewhat quickly and becomes fairly generic, so I guess it's a perfect trailer in that sense, as it really doesn't tell you anything about what happens past the 30-minute mark. Has anyone ever seen "The Recruit" with Al Pacino and Collin Ferrell? It's kind of the opposite of that, where the trailer is the LAST thirty minutes of the movie and you know that nothing is important up to that point and there's no mystery at all, because OF COURSE the bad guy is exactly who you think it is the entire time.

I don't remember anything really being crazy at all, as the trailer set it up to be a big mystery, but when the twist is revealed, that it's just basically a kidnapping plot, it's pretty straight forward. I only saw it once though, which was in theaters nearly twenty years ago.

I remember Cage's reaction to watching the snuff film being pretty hilarious, especially considering that his character has supposedly already seen some horrible, horrible shit in his day. We're told that this is like the most disturbing shit ever, and even though we see someone murdered, it kind of feels like everyone's overreacting. What if this is Joaquin's character from "Parenthood" and he really DID get messed up by all the endless jerking off? Keanu said he'd be okay, but maybe he was wrong... Has anyone else seen the George C. Scott flick "Hardcore"? The premise is a little different, like he's looking for his daughter or something, and I'd say that it has a "happy" ending, but Cage pretty much went on the same quest through the seedy porn underworld as he did, only in a much more cartoonish fashion. Ironically, we remember Schumacher's previous film for all of the nipples more than we remember the nipples in this one, a movie ABOUT porn.

Or that she (it's always the girl) beats it, gets better, and it either doesn't work out after a couple more weeks OR, since they professed their undying love for each other when one of them was supposed to die, they do stick together out of a sense of obligation, but the decision makes them miserable for the rest of their fucking lives.

So why do people get all up in arms about remakes and reboots and stuff, yet no one seems to be too upset when this same movie basically gets made again year after year after year after year? All you need to know is the premise and that "she was hiding a terrible secret" to figure out beat for beat exactly what will happen for the next two hours. I guess there aren't any complaints because our moms love watching this shit over and over...

Based on every movie like this ever, I'm going to guess that it's Ryder that bites the dust? After developing a mildly inconvenient cough, of course.

Yeah, the sequels were pretty much straight to HBO, I think.

Come on, as far as we know, Swedish royalty is ALL about the butt sex. I blame our school systems for playing down butt sex and its role in international relations over the years.

I think Statham is highly underrated for his fine performances in terrible films, basically the same performance he does in EVERY film, which I hope will be discussed when HDTGM gets "Furious".

"Face/Off" is the alpha and the omega. "Face/Off" is all.

How "Ghost Mom" with Phylicia Rashad didn't happen in about 1991 or so, I'll never know!

I think that the opposite can be true as well, that something can be completely inept at what it was trying for and fail on every level and still be a great "turn your brain off" movie, like a "The Room" or a "Birdemic". In those cases, I think the intention is pure, but the filmmakers had intended to do something else entirely. If they catch on though and knowingly try to replicate it, or someone else sets out to TRY to make a bad movie, that's when you go right to "Yeah, this is just stupid".

To be fair, the female henchman WAS the most dangerous baddie, and it was actually the one girl that got the Kingsman position, even if her involvement in the finale was someone marginalized. All she really did was take a balloon into space and fire a rocket launcher at a satellite...or something.

Not that it pertains to this movie necessarily, as I had a lot of fun with it and it's not as bad at what it does as some flicks that try to pull the same tricks, but that reminds me, does anyone know where the line is between the "just turn your brain off and have fun" argument and "Okay, that WAS just fucking stupid"? I mean, even with something like the Transformers movies, which are super repetitive, super dumb, and super long, you'll still have people saying that you "just need to turn your brain off and enjoy it" when im pretty sure there's nothing that will make me enjoy it if doing that didn't work the three other times.

If it's true, it's like choosing between a starring vehicle and an ensemble piece, or maybe one project just looked better than the other on paper. HIMYM looks like it could have been any number of shows that had already failed that looked like they were trying to be the next "Friends".

I think another actor that we all know and love has the market cornered when it comes to anything wicker-related (you could say that he's a man of it...), so maybe that lovely holder/bottle can be made out of a different material.