PlanBFromOuterSpace

OK, I'm sorry for starting all this business, as it's a discussion probably better suited for a different forum and not a place where we all get together to watch bad stuff and bag on it for fun. I've been chatting it up with some friends of mine today that have worked in similar environments and dealt with similar people, and we've had a lot of fun with it, so I'll keep it away from here. However, there may be a time or two in the future where I bring up "Star Trek Satin Jacket Guy"... ANYWAY, I'm happy to get back to dogging on the ridiculousness that was the "Daredevil" movie! I think I may re-watch it tonight. It's funny how in recent years, it's retroactively become less of a starring vehicle for Affleck and become more notable for co-starring the director of "Iron Man". Seriously, I think that's the blurb they stick on the Blu-Ray cover. Also, does anyone else find it weird that even though the same guy wrote and directed both films, "Daredevil" is so much more entertainingly bad than "Ghost Rider"? While there's not enough in "Ghost Rider" to really warrant a full episode, I do find it strange that that Marvel movie, more than even "Spider-Man" or any of the "X-Men" flicks, feels more like an all-ages movie along the lines of "Fantastic Four", which is kind of weird to say about a movie where the main character was given his powers by Satan.

I'm sticking with John Matrix, the Arnold Schwarzenegger character from "Commando"!

Sorry, it's just that I worked at a comic shop that was right down the way from the Hot Topic, and I just recall a bunch of people that worked or went there that seem to be worked up about the same things they were worked up about ten years ago like nothing's allowed to change or get better, and a lot of the customers at my store were the same way. That's all well and good if you don't like something and want to discuss it, but at my OTHER job at the movie theater, I'd see the very same people regularly spend money on these movies they were "never" going to see. I'm all for being educated on an issue so that you can reply with more than "because it sucks!" when backing up your side of an argument, but when you go to the midnight show, come back 3 more times in the next 2 weeks to see it with different groups of friends, and then take your kids to it, I start to get the feeling that you MIGHT not hate something as much as you say you do after paying to see it for the fifth time. So like I said about the geek rage thing, it can be completely disregarded, because those people are money in the bank. Everything's the worst thing ever until it's the best thing ever, whether they come out and say it or not. To bring it back around to Affleck, I genuinely believe that most of these folks didn't see "Hollywoodland" (the best Superman movie of 2006!), "The Town", or "Argo", that his filmography begins with "Mallrats" and ends with "Daredevil". That's right, they didn't even give themselves a chance to hate "Paycheck"! Did I really say "haters gotta hate"? Oh jeez, I did. I feel so...dirty.

The thing is though, particularly when it comes to the Hot Topic kids and other younger folks, is that I don't think they've ever seen anything with Ben Affleck in it that WASN'T a Kevin Smith movie if they've ever seen anything with him in it at all, and they certainly haven't bothered with anything in the last decade. It's like the people that say they liked "Avatar" better the first time they saw it when it was called "Dances With Wolves", but then they'd never seen THAT either. Haters just gotta hate, i guess.

I don't think people getting upset about Affleck in 2013 even know what they're supposedly upset about! Are they seriously still holding 2003 against him? I know some people that do it that are too young to even know WHY they'd be anti-Affleck, and they're also the same Hot topic kids that worship at the altar of the Boondock Saints, so fuck 'em. Still, Daredevil wasn't great, and I loved all things Daredevil at that point. The tone's all out of whack as mentioned before and the laws of gravity are forgotten about halfway through. Some decent what-the-fuckery on display here. The follow-up, Elektra, was just a boring, generic piece of shit though, so no need to touch that one. As far as any geek rage towards Affleck as Batman goes, I don't think there's anything to worry about. Geek rage is the most unreliable and hypocritical anger there is. They'll bitch about it, they'll still see it three times in the theater, and then they'll buy the Blu-Ray, but NOT the combo pack with the DVD and digital copy, because they're serious and they need to show Warner Brothers who's REALLY in charge! I'm a movie theater manager and a long time comic shop employee and who do you think I see pop up in both places? Hmmmmmm. Films like Jonah Hex, The Spirit (oooohhhh, another good HDTGM suggestion), and The Losers would have made even LESS money if not for these people that swore they'd never see them.

"Con Air" and "Face/Off" came out the same month, like 3 weeks apart, so to those of us that were there, it was practically a double feature to begin with!

I manage a movie theater, so I've probably seen more of the 2001-now movies in theaters than anyone really should have. There are only a few of the films that I haven't seen at least significant chunks of, and I'm sure I've seen all the "good" parts, but this list will only be the ones I remember seeing in their entirety from beginning to end in one stretch. Seen: -Last Airbender: Saw it in the theater with the girl I was dating at the time because her kid wanted to see it. He was 3 and did karate in the aisle for what must have been the entire duration of the film. -Mac & Me: I grew up in the 80's and had cable. Whether you meant to or not, you saw that movie at least a half dozen times. -Green Lantern: Saw it in the theater, and it's reeks of a dozen different scripts being patched together. I like how they explain the whole history of the GL Corps, rather than have it play out in the story, just to explain the exact same thing AGAIN a half hour later. We're always ahead of the main character and not finding things out WITH him, and that's just fucking horrible storytelling. -Punisher: War Zone: Saw it in the theater, and I re-watch it on a pretty regular basis. -The Room: Watched it at home with a room full of friends, which is really the ONLY way to see it. Watching this movie alone is like playing football without tuxedos. It just doesn't make sense! -Superman 3: Re-watched it recently after having not seen it since it was on TV all the time when I was a kid, and I barely remembered any of it. -Catwoman -88 Minutes: Probably one of the best experiences I had watching a terrible film in the theater,as it was just me and a couple of employees dogging on it's ridiculousness the whole time. I've only seen it once, but it was so, so memorable in it's badness. -Abduction: I'm IN this one. Sort of. Feel free to check out the thread for that episode to read about my adventures on the "Abduction" set and Taylor Lautner's creepy giraffe neck. It's no sassy gay hand though... -Speed 2: Cruise Control: More like Snooze Control, amirite? -Godzilla: I was out of the country for the summer of '98 and didn't catch this until it hit video. I remember not HATING it, but I don't think I've seen it since it made the rounds on HBO. -Judge Dredd: I was there opening night for this one. I got into the comics several years later, which made the movie even more frustrating, because there are signs throughout the film that whoever wrote it had done their homework, as a lot of stuff from the books made it into the movie, so at least SOMEONE had read the comic, but the character of Dredd himself was grossly mishandled. -Spider-Man 3: Another one that I saw once in the theater that I didn't remember 75% of when I re-watched it on TV. -Batman & Robin: This is one of the first movies that I saw in a theater where I felt embarrassed just watching it, and I saw "Showgirls" in the theater, so that's saying something. -Wild Wild West -Jaws: The Revenge -Road House: I saw it countless times on TV. The girl I was dating around the time of Airbender was over at my house one night when this was on, and I had to EXPLAIN what Road House was and why it was so great. She's only a few years younger than me and didn't grow up in a bomb shelter or anything, so I didn't know HOW she could have missed it! -Barb WIre: Saw it in the theater. Yeah, sorry about that... -Sleepaway Camp: Once my parents started letting me watch R-rated flicks in 1988 or so, I rented every movie in every series I'd heard about. After I burned through those, I discovered this and was pretty disappointed. It's far FAR more entertaining now as an adult though. -Cobra: Yuhr thuh zizeez, and ahm thee cyuh! Stallone at his Stalloneliest! -Liz & Dick: Saw this one just because they were going to do an episode on it. It was pretty unremarkable in every way and not really worth it, so yeah, thanks a lot. Assholes... -Reindeer Games: Saw it in the theater, and I just pretty much remember Charlize's tits. -Devil's Advocate: Caught it in the theater, have had it on DVD since the time that those were knew, but probably hadn't watched it since the week of the show, and it was a really fun watch. -Street Fighter: This was smack dab in the middle of JCVD's golden age where he could do no wrong, and this film was no exception. Greatest. Speech. Ever. -Howard the Duck. Again, it was the 80s, and I had cable. -Sharknado: Glad I watched it for the show, but wow, what a piece of shit...

I can see it now, all these swimming pools just randomly placed in the middle streets, alleyways, shipping yards, wherever they need a fight to break out. And of course people jumping in the water for no other reason than to follow the hero and get their asses kicked.

That said, if they finally ever do "Southland Tales", I will claim FULL responsibility for that one! Bwahahahahaha!

I remember "The Last Boy Scout" being particularly brutal to watch on regular TV, as it wasn't just the occasional word that was overdubbed, but entire chunks of dialog at a time. I think we're getting a bit off the badly ADR'd track here, so maybe we should have a hilariously edited movies thread?

I was never really a fan of the guy, but I saw him pop up on one of those VH-1 clip shows or like a multi-part history of hip-hop documentary series they were doing or something, which i thought was weird, but he actually had a lot of interesting insight and was pretty funny and entertaining.

I think "Heat" became an Alan Smithee film in it's edited form, because Michael Mann didn't approve of the edited-for-TV cut that eliminated entire subplots to fit in the three-hour block.

I know the tears start to well up for me whenever "Fantastic Four" comes on, but I'm usually all dried up three days later after the seventh time it's been on that week...

I don't think "Piranha 3D" was trying to be awful at all. I'm sure it was trying to be fun and tongue-in-cheek and the folks behind that one knew exactly what they were doing, so it was a legitimately well-done film for the kind of movie it was. "Piranha 3DD", on the other hand, was made by hacks and was a complete piece of shit with no redeemable qualities. I don't think he'd be burning any valuable bridges if Paul and the HDTGM crew took a shit all over that one. It'd be interesting to do them as a double feature, with them discussing the fun crazy of the first one and how it all went wrong the second time. Also, I saw "Wishmaster" in the theater. Yeah, I was the guy.

Oh! I don't know why I didn't think of it before, but the ADR for Bane in "Dark Knight Rises" was pretty puzzling. I know the original voice and been changed, but the way they mixed it where his voice comes from EVERYWHERE was pretty distracting for a while. It's not quite as bad on TV depending on your set-up, but in theaters it was kind of ridiculous.

Not to criticize a certain co-host of the show (not that it's his fault anyway), but I remember "The Dictator" as LITERALLY having an insane amount of ADR. For instance, every time someone was facing away from camera and the other character wasn't saying anything, it seemed like they dropped in another one-liner that was clearly recorded at another time, all for the sake of there not being a nanosecond in the film where someone wasn't talking. Most of them weren't even funny, but you just KNOW there was someone that had written in a Justin Bieber reference that was fighting like hell to get it in SOMEHOW, and that was it.

Half demon! Half cop! ALL Demon Cop!

But has anyone SEEN it yet? I'm not going to see it just based on just that, because 2% can mean it's just average bad, not crazy bad, and I can see everything I want for free. I'm more concerned about it being just a waste of time.

That guy lived in EVERY neighborhood!

LEVIATHAN, people! Jesus, how small was that window of time where namedropping "Leviathan" seemed like a good idea?

This movie is MADE of bonkers.

I feel like this film was the end of JCVD's Golden Age, as I loved everything of his from 1992-1995. I just re-watched this recently on Netflix, and while ridiculous, it still holds up pretty well. He's been doing some good work over the last few years as well, particularly the last two "Universal Soldier" films, and I really hope he turns up in more theatrically released stuff soon because he was awesome in his supporting turn in "Expendables 2"..

This thing needs to stay on the front page!

#1 Southland Tales- I'm been championing this one for a long time, and I think we need to keep the thread for that one handy on the front page at all times! #2 Mortal Kombat: Annihilation- This movie is dumber than shit, even by video game movie terms. The first one was fine, but THIS one tried to jam in every character possible, which led to everyone getting one fight, three minutes of screen time, and some of the most insane monologging and unnecessary subplots #3 X-Men Origins: Wolverine #4 Resident Evil: Whatever the Last One Was Called- The what-the-fuckery on display would be even better if they haven't seen the rest of the series #5 Con Air- Put...the bunny...back in the box...

You do realize that Coppola directed "Jack", and you're suggesting a completely ordinary John Grisham legal drama?