NicholasSchleder

whoville sucks yo grandmas balls #ripdrsues

Hookah? Swerve.

If I meet someone named "Bon'QuiQui" in real life I don't know what I would do. I don't think I'd live on much longer after that.

ticket to ride- beatles. just figured out that the girl having a "ticket to ride" can be interpreted as she has permission to ride this dick

#LincolnProblems black people be all like "free me" and im like "wait bitch, swerve"

Listening to past Paul McCartney is inspiring. Looking at current Paul McCartney is depressing.

#PerksOfDatingMe laughs & a penis

Corona with lemon is good #notagirl #ihaveapenis

DADDY JUST WOKE UP, I'll be there in 2 swipes of a salamander mkay? #urgent

These old people really working out their quads with these standing ovations. #SOTU

Me and my piano just dropped acid #BlackKeys #DudeOnPiano #Grammys

VOXER ME FOR ENTERTAINMENT

Do you like cats? Because I like your pussy. #CornyPickUpLines #wtf

Women spend like 10,000 on a wedding dress and are smarter then men HOW?

Goodnight sweet prince (I'm talking to myself)

I feel like that hot chick who after her vaccination had her life ruined except for me it's only slight discomfort. #FuckTdap

wow I think I left my phone at work -.-

Just saw the hottest woman I'd ever seen at UOP

People are weirdos

Little racist- but otherwise I think it's a funny joke. http://t.co/V5E9HRzl

All I do is win win win and sometimes lose lose lose well mostly I kinda lose lose lose shit, I never win win win. My life sucks sucks sucks

Give me that toot toot? Wait I don't think I want that. http://t.co/KSGXyRoF via @youtube

Bawitdaba. Da bang, a dang diggy diggy. Diggy said, "the"; Boogy said, "up jump the boogy".

The epitome of trying too hard.