NicholasSchleder

Django Unchained was kinda racist- they killed all the white people! #TAM @DougBenson

Getting your face licked by your dog then realizing her mouth smells like cat poop is not the business.

Really - who wants to see #DjangoUnchained tomorrow

Who the fuck tweets on Christmas

HOW FUCKED UP IS THAT

Guys - I'm really cracking the fuck up right now lol

Damn- when I heard that I was like yolo swag I must be dreaming hashtag unbelievable

DUI checkpoint tonight. Idk where- probably on Pacific. RT let people know / be smart and drive through delta

Waiter, could I have a side of fries with my armageddon? #mayans

R.E.M. - It's The End Of The World: http://t.co/wnkTlQ74 via @youtube

There's going to be a new X-men movie called "X-Men: Days of Future Past" I've never wanted to see a movie less (based on that title)

Sometimes I'm like "why bother?" - but other times I be like "why, brother?"

I'm always listening Pandora

End of the world is friday so #oomf should throw a end of the world party

my fuckin shoulder

Fish be flopping, right guys?

And you think this gives you power over me?

I want to go camping with a bunch of friends

White chick's are really in to other white chicks

I tried to teach myself how to dougie but I worship a false prophet @unsuccessful

Asian lady stalking me at dillards trying to get commission off me. I went to another cashier and talked shit about her lelelelelelelelelele

Haven't heard a single gunshot since #InStockton has trended. Everyone is too busy tweeting.

My high school sweetheart was anxiety and we're still together.

When you sneeze, you're really just pooping out snot from your nose. #wordsofwisodom

Butts are really just toothpaste dispensers.