wyldride

Hope he and Blanche get along OK. It can be weird when there's a new baby. RT @iliza I'm really embracing him as my son

Here's the thing about "manscaping": How do you get the little squares of toilet paper to stick to your junk?

Or it already happened&wrapping early is your afterlife.#moreofanapresvie RT @feliciaday That means the apocalypse happens tomorrow right?

Aooooo! http://t.co/wI1mrrKf RT @cheezitslut Fuck, Marry, Kill: Teen Wolf, Teen Witch, Teen Mom

Or, at least enjoy the shade. RT @SarahKSilverman If you feel you're living in someone's shadow, you should move

Well, you shouldn't leave them lying around where anyone can get them. RT @alisonhaislip stole all my friends

Moon cameras add ten pounds. But in 1/6 gravity, you barely notice it. RT @NikkiGlaser Did he look fat?

That's so she can sing from her diaphragm. RT @MinaThorne This girl singing karaoke's ... Yep she had no panties on.

No, no -- Newcastle is a little further south. #geordie RT @thegynomite All the babies in Scotland sound like Jordy

Fantasy football widow?: http://t.co/cnVHTsxq RT @allisonmunn fantasize about football

"Not 2B confused w/Florence Henderson syndrome, where U fall in love with the actress who plays your mom." RT @natalimorris Trending Show

Since MTV Unplugged, everyone thinks the acoustic slide is more artistic. RT @imaliwaller Why don't we do the electric slide anymore?

Just your followers. Bcc 4 every1 else RT @WhitneyCummings Replying 2 some1 on Twitter is like emailing someone&cc'ing everyone w/a computer

Haunch tease: http://t.co/HiI1RX2N RT @iliza Monday haunch day #showMeYourHaunches

Quick! Perform the ritual, lest it destroy the world! #cabininthewoods RT @aots Uh-oh. Someone woke up the #aots twitter wall!

OK: "'Car Keys' isn't a great name for a dog." Happy to be of service. RT @iliza Tell me that "car keys" isn't a great name for a dog

Siouxsie and the Banksies #twothingsawkwardlycombinedfornoreason

The Bourne Lagasse #twothingsawkwardlycombinedfornoreason

ASMR kinda sounds like what I get listening to certain music, or singing. Mostly down my spine. RT @NikkiGlaser New episode of YHTBT

Fluently: http://t.co/lTgGuOl3 RT @WendyLiebman I hope we speak the same language.

Glad youtube wasn't a thing back when I had four out at once in hospital. RT @laylakayleigh Dying of embarrassment

I added a video to a @YouTube playlist http://t.co/9qynsXkh The Church - Under The Milky Way

It probably would've had a more directed-by-a-zombie feel. RT @pagetpaget what if Bob Fosse had directed "The Hunger Games"?

I was wondering why they hold it today: http://t.co/YL8TpXAS RT @rainnwilson For all the women giving birth today, this is your holiday.

Umm--Uh, this might be awkward. See the Queen Mum's, uh...Uh, have fun in London. RT @oliviamunn I imagine the Queen Mum's gonna wanna hang