nrkist

That's awesome. Can you do another where the bubble letters inside the skull read 'Foam' and 'motherfuckers wanna laugh' is sorta wrapped around the edge of the head? Excellent, tribute.

Scott and Co., this was a brave thing you did. I can't imagine how hard this must have been to go back and edit this material, to listen to it again, so soon. This news had flown under my radar, but I had been digging up all the Foam Corner eps religiously just the week before, cause I hadn't had my fill in a while on CBB. Perhaps the germ was in my head with the finale of Parks and Rec. I was delighted when the new CBB showed up in my feed and it was Farts and Pro. I thought Scott's intro was a really overlong setup to a new Wittel's character...and then I heard Scott's voice start to break. I wish this hadn't happened, I wish this wasn't so difficult, but I'm happy you made the choices you made at earwolf. It would be a crime to hide any little bit of Wittels from the world. He leaves a really bizarre and singular hole in the universe to those that don't even know him. I'm still in denial and believe he just evolved into his final form of purely hilarious and untwitterable foam.

Dan...I don't care who your dad is, OK? Mr Telfer may have allowed for discussions regarding the logistics of various buthole executions, but he was a remenant of an older day. This, I will not be having. It's goddamn 2000 and something! "...or there's a poll" Where does it end with you man? I bet you can't wait for me to work that 'poll' into my next tongue-in-cheek bit of wordplay.

What?! C'mon...that was a big bear. If we want to get down to brass tacks and buttholes....like...c'mon...the giant bear clearly has a superior diameter of buttholiness. I can't believe we are even discussing this. Nerd Poker moderator, please delete this thread.

As long as we are discussing the current campaign and a TPK. We have a full-time NP crew again. They have a good chemistry now. This current 'campaign' started off as a danger-room with Blaine considering how much player shuffling would take place. Ironically, Blaine's first ep was definitely the strongest. Blaine needs to play more characters and setup more situations that don't immediately appear to be confrontations. That's hard now with GIANTS, ALIEN LAND, and the fact that the group already burned so many bridges and the players are pretty used to be directionless and just wandering into the next confrontation Blaine sets up. They have nothing else to do! I hope this signals a turn. I think Dan's Lyra was always going to die when the new group started to establish and take form. Dan is really invested with this group, and he's really good, and he probably wants this to start moving forward in plot. In short, Dan has already rolled up a while back, while Blaine built something a little meatier that would revolve around his character's introduction and create a real campaign level plot. When Blaine was ready, he gave Dan's Lyra her pink card, and Dan was too excited to await his imminent death, and executed himself by taking a ridiculous and silly risk resulting in Lyra's impossibly unavoidable death that both the player and GM wanted anyway. Just a theory... Edit: Oh, two other things I forgot to state/mention. I don't think this suggests a TPK, nor do I believe that is what should happen. I think this signs the introduction of a truly 'Dan' character and a focal plot that Blaine started building when the group solidified. Secondly, I think Blaine's goofy Color Continent is a jab at the truly horrendous Bandworld books, where the world exists in concentric rings of colors...for some ineffable reason...that has no impact upon the plot...

Yes, I take issue . There is no doubt that the three have fantastic chemistry. 'Performing' is not really a thing in the podcast. They rigged that bit, and June didn't set it up right. I'm happy that you loved it. I love the podcast. This, the easiest material ever, was dealt with as one deals with a chore, and then pre-emptively throws forethought band-aid on it. Edit: And yes, they had already scripted that segment previously. It's really obvious how June missed the setup yet both Paul and Jason insist that this is still going to happen. They even rib her about it, while carrying away with a non-existant, but agreed upon, premise. Your 'you mad?' response made me wonder. Am I 'you mad'? It might have held more weight if your 'you mad' was tagged with a 'bro' or 'brah. Yes, I'm definitely 'you mad?'. They can do so much better than this episode.

The most enjoyable thing about this episode, was clearly manufactured. I'm talking about 'milky tits', but it's very forced. It's like they knew this episode wasn't going to get out of first gear, and they were going to have introduce 'a bit' halfway through. June did not set it up correctly, and it was clearly a 'setup', yet both Jason and Paul still immediately played upon a flubbed non-setup for the 'milky tits' thing? It was quite scripted and forced. I know our favorite trio has a lot on their plate. Maybe dial it back to once a month, or just let the podcast rest for a while until they have the time or interest to return to it as invested as they were in earlier episodes? Edit: I think this might be the last cast for a while. Wolfpop and things considered. Pauls 'sign-off' to the crew... Hey, Paul, the people you were thanking weren't 'letting' you do the podcast. They were HELPING you do the podcast. Ungh, that sign-off was weird.

What? Why are you reading all this into it? Their project couldn't get funding, so they did the most absurd thing possible to force a premise for a film. I guess it could have been a female actor in the role...but then the entire premise of the film falls apart. Look, the 'gag' requires a real 'manly-man' becomes pregnant and goes through all the stages of pregnancy...because...it's hilarious? I dunno, it's just a really bad gag, and not the insidious commentary you are bringing to the table. This episode was kinda off to me. They spent alot of time seriously discussing the ridiculous mechanics of the pregnancy...which isn't funny. I mean, it's the gag. Your supposed to look at the very VHS/DVD cover of prego-schwarzenegger mugging at the camera, slap your thigh, and gasp between tearful, gut-bursting guffaws, "HOW'S THAT GONNA WORK?!" Like, I dunno. It's a really stupid film, but arguing the logistics of the pregnancy...like, it's the 'joke'. It's not supposed to make sense. It absolutely CAN'T make sense. So I dunno what they were really delving for half this episode. There is a film in their minds where a man injects himself with a baby...and what? It's not as terrible as Junior? The thing that makes Junior so bad, is that even if you meet the premise half-way...everything about the film is still terrible. Terrible even for a film about a guy injecting himself with a baby, terrible. Edit: What I mean is, they normally establish the premise, take some funny jabs at it, and quickly get into the bits of absurd internal logic, production decisions, and performances. I feel like this episode never got out of first gear.

Well, you missed the not-so-subtle one before it that I lead with. In much worse taste than the cheesy Seaquest joke following it's darkness. I'm just making a point. It's really hard to touch this without a turn of phrase coming off as inhuman. Also, you let me get away with 'kick him when he kicked himself all the way down to the bottom...even if it's only a sidekick...'. I felt bad about that, but a point NEEDED to be made. Sidekick cannot be riffed, it will simply be depressing upon investigation, no matter how peripheral. Edit: It's like how Printers' wives are always, "If printing was a river in Egypt...this is seriously DEpressing." And then Johannes Gutenberg is like, "WTF are you talking about, Printers' Wives?!" It just doesn't work...despite everything preceding being historically accurate.

I don't think they'll touch this film. It's worth riffing, it is terrible, but Brandis's death is pretty sad and would hang real heavy. A child actor that was prescient enough to see his own decline impending. He tried to break into some adult roles, got some really tough breaks, and fell into depression and offed himself. I never found him that 'great'. I pretty much identify him as the kinda* cooler Wesley Crusher of Seaquest, which is the lamer version of TNG. Do your own Math of Lameness there to figure out how that slices. The caveat is there, because he was still essentially Wesley Crusher, which is a really irritating character that a show believes they are writing FOR you...and TNG is already pretty lame, and Seaquest is the really watered down version of that. Imagine having to BE that character late in your child career, when you are already doubting yourself and your own bs hype machine. Anyway, it's like kicking someone when they already kicked themselves all the way down to the bottom, after the fact and the ultimate note on the matter. Brandis would be the first to lash his own acting and the ridiculous projects he was in. It's just in bad taste, even if it's only a sidekick.

<something interesting suddenly abbreviated>...So, I wanted to tell you guys a little somethin' 'bout NautreBox--<fastforward>--the only box--<fastforward>---that is a nature box <fastforward>--seriously, NatureBox or however the hell you spell that<fastforward> it's a box <FASTFORWARD> and it's nature <SERIOUSLY FASTFORWARD> Essentially a REAL Nature Box....<fastforward>...Naturebox...<fastforward> Imagine a child collecting some leaves in a shoebox <FASTFORWARD>...it's now transformed to a NatureBox, right? <FASTFORWARD> Naturebox, Nature's Shoebox. <FASTFORWARD>

I know I will get a ton of flack for this, but I accidentally discovered a comedy with Visually Impaired dialogue ontop. It's hilarious. My girlfriend saved it for me, cause she thought I'd enjoy it, 'This is what you do!'. About a Boy, literally some guy in a jokular voice describing the on-screen actions: "NOW, he picks up a box of CEREAL, hehe, oh man...They were just literally talking about how bad his diet is...because he's an irreverant bachelor...cereal...THAT'S WHAT IT TURNS OUT HE'S EATING!" This is not a joke btw. I don't know how my GF accidentally recorded the Visually Impaired audio, and it was very crushing to me the way she laid out, 'This is what YOU do, right?'. Edit: My GF thought it was very funny, and someone riffing the episode with a 'hot-mic', even though it is strictly explicating the on-screen action in a comedy, while trying to maintain a comedic tempo. It's really weird and terrible.

Monkey Shines 1988. Skeleton Crew 1985. I don't get the joke. The 'connection' is that it is a straight adaption with some weirdness atop. I keep reading this, as if there is a joke I am missing somewhere in there... BTW Maximum Overdrive! Your theory is that Paul once saw a poster for a BOOK, and 'misremembered' it as preceding the FILM (though it did indeed precede the film), based off the novella in said terrible book. You are misremembering events... It's one of the first terrible King adaptions. Sure, there are lots of them, but this one predates pretty much all. I don't get your point, or your sarcasm if it's intended. Your Monkey Sharcasm is real bare bones... Like...I get it's a joke... For instance: The other night my DVR messed up and my girlfriend recorded 'About a Boy' with the vision-impaired thing turned on. It was hilarious. More hilarious than 'About a Girl' has a right to be: "He is now wiping away 'The Principal Sucks' from the bathroom wall. He writes in 'The Principal Rocks' with a smirk." "<scene setting> He is holding cereal <plus audio overdub> I'm holding cereal" Like, these gags are hilarious when someone explains them?

It's a film about cocaine? It's not even an allegory...I don't even know where to start... Edit: that's not to say it isn't good, it's actually really funny. I just don't understand the framing. "I wouldn't count on it honey...the last time I saw him he was a different man. He burst in unannounced. Pushed me around. He was COVERED with hair...it was...very sexy..."

'Gun Woman' (2014)...not any of those other 'Gun Woman's you are thinking of. It's a violent gonzo gore-fest that would normally be lost in the straight to video gonzo gorefest rave in Asia. It's as down-home Asian as a tentacle getting frisky with your watchamacalls. Desu!? So what separates this from the pack? Well, it's trying to be La Femme Nikita. It's real earnest and serious. It is played entirely straight. There is not an ounce of humor in a film that features some of the most ridiculous things ever commited to screen. When someone told me about this film, my first question was, '...so she's half-gun, half-woman...? Why can't she be a Gun Lady? 'Woman' is real impersonal for a protagonist...' The response was unnecessarily cagey and danced around anything peripherally related to my goofy questions. This deception intrigued me and led me to this film. It's insane. More insane than normal asian cinema insanity.

Yeah, this is a movie that is such a win on paper. Treasure Island - huge budget - big stars - family blockbuster...and then it FoodFight!'ed itself. It's a film that seems intentionally designed to make anything enjoyable about it gross/boring/gross/uninteresting. If you haven't watched this film and are expecting some high seas adventures, it's like discovering the Star Wars prequels are infact some really drawn out trade disputes with confusing and uninvesting action sequences peppered in between. It's really one of the blandest films ever made...when it isn't being suddenly offensively ridiculous. It's so bad it's bad. It seems like a possible 'good film', or at the very least a 'good-bad', or mayhaps a 'so-bad-it's-good'. It is infact 'bad-bad', as impossible as that may seem. Harlin had the reverse Midas touch. He could apparently turn gold to coal to dust to seasonal allergen.

I like this suggestion, purely on the point that the sub-title adds nothing. Sure we are used to pointless flavor 'colon' thing...but this is literally 'colon' slightly-abbreviated-title-of-that-which-precedes-it. I've seen this film, and it is somewhat earnest, and dramatic. That is a 'dramatic' colon. Almost as if they believe there would be more 'Dragon Wars', and they were pre-empting a necessity to differentiate and already leap-frogging to branding. Even the tense is confusing "wars" = 'd-war'? Dumb movies: D-movie I also hereby trademark 'flavor colon'. "The tastiest colon, the famliest colon, America's colon...flavor colon."

BTW, if you wondered anything about James 'Jimmy', 'the', 'Jerry', 'Canada', pronounced, 'Cuh-han-duh', he grew up in the tiny town of Ridiculousname-astan. It's Western Canadian and a-drip with maple syrup. Beneath a bandalier of grenades and a black-face skull, there is a lover of fine cinema. He enjoys observing trucks...especially those that may be sentient or IF sentient be especially capable of KILLING HIM. Some may doubt this, as all images of trucks he posts suggests they are all intended as ironic engines of death.

I feel like, between people trying to fuel my apparent anthropomorphized train fetish, and people demanding (3) that Maximum Overdrive be riffed, we should take it upon ourselves to do it. J.Canada, has a real grip on some truck fetish. And apparently I am really the foil for train/gremlin/porn. We only need a third straight man, to fill out the cast. Just some guy who's real ambivalent about trains, gremlins or porn, let alone train/gremlin/porn. Can such a man exist?

"Sorry if I've been a little Micheal J. Fox in your Teen Wolf march madness. All up in your grills, and really dead-ending this precinct rivalry with werewolf-dunk after werewolf-dunk. By the way, I'm a werewolf, a werewolf cop reliving his yesteryears of highschool werewolf guard fame on the JV basketball team...if that somehow drifted by someone."

"Good Afternoon, Mr...doesn't matter, I'm your publicly appointed attorney. I understand your last attorney fucked himself to death?" "I guess. I don't know why he was doing that bro." "I'm just a little confused regarding your story. As unlikely as it is, I fail to see how bending oneself in half allows one any easier access to prospective suicidal ass-fucking? It's like trying to face two sides of a penny. It's just not going to happen no matter how many times you fold it." "Look, I dunno man. I dunno why he was doing that man..." "I guess you actually can face two sides of penny if you bend it into a moebius..." "Man. I dunno. I dunno why he was doing that..." "Perhaps something happened recently, that may bear some relevance to his absurd death? Do you recall anything strange immediately preceding this incident?" "Listen Holmes, I DON'T KNOW WHY THAT GUY WAS DOING THAT." I just like the conceit that nobodies first thought is, "This is both physically and conceptually impossible. The fact that he is bent in half, while also bizarre, does not reconcile this. It's possibly related to that evil genie...". They just think the attorney is kinda a jerk, broke the laws of reality, and did this to himself. "Man...why are you doing that?"

I will absolutely pick up Book Three of the Dark Tower series if a murderous Thomas the Tank Engine is a plot point and there is a suggestion that it is related to the same entity from Maximum Overdrive. George Carlin just leanin' out the cab like a maniac, doing some classic stand-up bits through a foam of mad saliva as they race down some rails in a silly dystopian King wasteland?

Wait, are you suggesting everyone's bitchy girlfriend is the same rhesus monkey really hamming it up? Turns out, totally not related to the candy we all love, Rhesus Peices. Tastes ape-shit.

Take some flakey whitefish of subtle flavor and zero texture, place it in an equally soft and tasteless flour tortilla. You now have a nice layer of tasteless, texturelessness that won't get in the way of your cheeses and salsas. Fish Tacos, cause enjoying a handful of shredded cheese and salsa is just weird. It's a beard for your weird cheese and salsa fetish. A fish taco is undoubtedly the nearest thing to liquid nourishment that can maintain a form by surface tension alone.

Thomas sure does have fun. Just terrifying, cocaine-fueled, child-like fun. Edit: What is Mr Conductor looking at? The action is clearly up front. I bet he is simply locked in place there and can't unsee the carnage Thomas left on the rails in his wake.