JeffBurtMacklinMarra

#2manyhashtags

Jeff, you've been good. Possibly even great. People named Jeff are destined for greatness, so you'll probably have a huge amount of success in everything you do. Best wishes, homie. Bye!

I'm going to try to have more funny status updates, because I desperately want you people to like me.

Facebook.com/Jeff.Marra Have fun, pals. Also, JC, I'm 22 also, we should kiss or something.

Guys, I went camping, now I'm tired and am gonna nap. I hope you all had a good weekend. Love you all.

I'm thinking of starting a podcast where I review produce. Hour long episodes breaking down exactly what makes a fruit or vegetable great. You can all be guests.

I enjoyed the script. I really think you captured my defining character trait of saying something not funny then disappearing.

Who wants to fight?

I changed my mind. Ill start a feud on the By the Way boards. Probably with Jeff Garlin.

I really wish I had a feud going. It would be some sweet sweet publicity. Greggy, wanna fight?

Sorry, I didn't mean to be so harsh, friends. I got stung by a wasp, so I was in a sour mood.

Last time I checked Hollywood wasn't in fucking England or the UK or whatever the fuck it's called. Nobody gives a shit about your "chips" everyone. So shut the fuck up.

I found a secret compartment with a bloody clown wig. There's also a pay stub for 3 first class tickets to Cabo paid with my credit card. This is bigger than just Patsmear.

Android, and it is pretty slow. Probably an old O.S. I think someone from the forum is behind this.

I think I've been buried alive. Help. I'm in a wooden box and the air is getting thin. All I have is this smartphone that only allows me to access this forum. Please find me. I don't know where I've been for the past 4 days.

I get what you're saying, but the guys who make huge leaps and make the show absolutely absurd. Imagine the insanity that would happen if Horatio Sanz, Zach Woods, Paul Rust, and Sean Clements all did a show together.

I got a job at a movie theater and I get free popcorn now. I think I get "the Popcorn Gallery" now. I've eaten 7 buckets of popcorn and I'm thinking clearer than ever.

Hey guys, I lost interest in you people for a few days, so fill me in on anything exciting that you guys have said in the past week. Please keep it short and sweet.

It's a shame no one had any idea that Brandon Boyd from Incubus is playing Jesus in the "arena rock spectacular" Jesus Christ: Superstar.

Sometimes I let my girl sit in when I'm commenting on the forums. I realize now that she messes up the vibe of the board. I'm gonna break up with her. Hopefully she doesn't get all fucktarded and sad and start whining about it. No Hablo crybaby. #savethedrama #forobama

Also, I'm probably gonna out everyone's real celebrity identities next week, so prepare for that shit storm.

Actually that's just a picture I snapped when me and the Hanks boys were goofin around and gettin froyo.

I refuse to hear any forum members voice. I assume all of you are actually a-list celebrities like I am, and I don't want the illusion shattered. I'm actually Jeff Bridges.

Mr Wain, you''ve worked with Jennifer Aniston before, did you know she was the first person I masturbated to?

Blood. Just blood.