chanson

Does anyone actually "rep" the South Bay? I feel like that's kind of gauche. I mean, what are you actually representing? Gentrification and increasing wealth disparities in an already economically lop-sided metropolitan area? That doesn't seem like something most people would "rep."

For all those three other people who care about this: CT from The Real World & The Challenge is on the "The In Addition Tos" episode of Kroll Show, which is interesting.

...also if you guys only had Andy Kneis on as a guest every single week I would support that creative decision as well. It's a joke but I'm also serious about it. Because I like Andy Kneis and his Astrovan a lot. And he's great. Just saying.

This fuckin' guy gets it. I miss the callers.

Now I have listened to the episode. Honest Thoughts: Engineer Cody, you really saved this episode, thus confirming my suspicion that you are pretty awesome and also great. Keep doing that. Pauly Shore, positivity and a good attitude can really go a long way. Listening also helps. I think a little empathy and humility can really be an asset to someone who is looking to find their place in an industry that is constantly changing. Sean and Hayes, you guys did good, too. I think that you guys are at your best when you guys are goofing around like in the first segment of this episode. I rarely laugh as hard as I did when you guys were doing the Magneto thing. It was great! I'm easily amused but I'm also picky about it. This episode really made me stop and think about Hollywood Handbook and where it's going. I think that the best episodes have been when a guest is in on the joke and really gets the conceit of the show. I suppose it would be hard to know who is going to be game for that if one doesn't already have a personal or professional relationship with them, but I would imagine that some people have a harder time catching on than others. I remember Grace Helbig, who I think is really funny, but also seems like she would have benefitted from having the concept explained to her a bit first so that she would be in on the joke rather than on the outside playing defense. Granted, I don't know the process you guys go through with guests before you start recording and it's possible you do explain the podcast to them ahead of time and some people are just bad at it. But I can empathize with Pauly Shore and can imagine being thrown into an environment like Hollywood Handbook where there are two guys talking nonsense and you would be left feeling like you were missing something. That would suck. There are probably better ways of dealing with it than lashing out at the engineer, who handled it brilliantly (seriously, good job Cody), but I can empathize nonetheless. That said, it probably isn't a mainstream audience that would get this podcast anyway. It's kind of a niche market of people who enjoy listening to two guys (very intelligent, talented, and funny guys) satirically talking to one another as caricatures of disconnected, arrogant, successful showbiz moguls. I sincerely love it, which is why I stick around and bullshit on the forums, but I'm also aware that I'm a relatively weird guy with strange interests who is good enough at pretending to be normal that people don't think too hard about my eccentricities or how I'm constantly judging them based on my ridiculously high standards. So I think if the show were to attract a larger audience it would be through accessibility, which to me seems like being really funny with great guests who are on the same level and contributing to the forward motion of the show rather than having to be helped along every step of the way. I think that it would also be nice if the interviews lasted longer when they were on a roll rather than sticking to the set timeframe if that's possible. I could see that being really engaging as well. I think it boils down to the fact that, as a listener, I enjoy it the most when Sean and Hayes are enjoying themselves and are trying to crack each other up and those are the moments that I lose it as well. So that's what I think. Love You, Bye.

...I just started listening to the episode a couple minutes ago and haven't gotten to the Pauly Shore part, but I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say that I don't think that it was a good idea to have Pauly Shore on the podcast. I thought this when Sean announced it on the forums last week but didn't feel like saying anything. I could be wrong about this though.

Waffle House is one of those chains that I'm not sure if I'm jealous or glad that we don't have them here but my feelings either way are so extreme that it would have to be one or the other.

Wait, really? Like for reals? Did you reveal this when I was dead? Or is this a bit? My mom went to prison once. It was inconvenient.

I think they should reach out to some more reality show people (preferably from The Real World or The Challenge) because it would be interesting to hear how these people are doing at breaking into Hollywood. It would also be an interesting tie-in with The Reality SHOW show.

Hollywood Handjobs should be broadcast on public radio. If (Seattle-native and resident) Luke Burbank gets to host Live Wire! and be on Wait Wait Don't Tell Me and Jesse Thorn's Bullseye is distributed by NPR then Earwolf really needs to up its public radio game. It's the next logical step from podcasting. I mean, I bet Sean could pull off his own syndicated conservative talk radio program but with all the intellectual shit Hayes brings to the table Hollywood Handjobs is a bit high-brow for that demographic. Hayes is like Garrison Keeler if he and Jian Gomeshi had an illigitimate lovechild that wasn't half Persian but, like his father before him, still got fired from the CBC for allegations of unwanted sexual advances and "rough sex". What's more public radio than that? You hear that, NPR? You can have your own sex scandal just like a real national broadcaster! Just hire Sean and Hayes!

I heard someone on NPR say The Mindy Project and my mind just put up a giant red flag because it has decided that it should be The Mimby Project. Thanks Sean and Hayes.

Didn't read it, but I liked it anyway. I'm a rebel. Edit: I did happen to accidentally read something about someone getting pregnant from a smile so my instincts were correct.

I'm not even gonna pretend to have any fucking clue what any of this means.

Delicate snowflakes, Greggy. Delicate snowflakes. Delicate snowflakes, Greggy. Delicate snowflakes.

I was just thinking about how there are probably only like 50 people who listen to Hollywood Handjobs, most of them are on the forums, and the other listens come from those people relistening to the episodes.

^^^^^^^ Yo! is this racist?

It is still unclear how this proves you are not like a me. For someone who has some kind of legal education I'm quite disappointed in your ability to prove a succinct point. And if, as some say, pictures say a thousand words then you have throughly wasted a thousand words and should be ashamed of yourself. Unless you were just being mean, in which case, job done. Love you, bye.

You're welcome. I didn't realize they were a summer camp thing. I associate them with my family in Canada and their love of anything named after small cities in Canada. One of my cousins was named Barry after Barrie, Ontario. He ended up being a ferry captain for the BC Ferries and as far as I know never visited Barrie, Ontario. It's weird.

Make it a diet Orange Crush (which inexplicably [racism?] cannot be purchased in Washington State) and I'll be there. I'll even bring nanayno bars (like Nanaimo bars but fishier).

If by ignore you mean masturbated furiously then yes. I ignored the shit out of it.

When did Zsa Zsa Gabor live on a farm, Hayes? Is that some kind of Jeopardy fact?

I used to say "Love you, Bye" at the end of mean comments to indicate that they were actually not mean but I've since become lazy and so now I just let people decide if they're mean or not on their own. I also think that people really shouldn't get too worked up about what someone says on an internet forum but I can understand if wires get crossed somewhere. I've also periodically made some grand gestures to explain how I feel about new people and how much I truly, unsarcastically love each and every individual delicate snowflake on this forum and how I'm actually a person who needs people to explain these sorts of things to them because I default to assuming everyone hates me (because childhood and a Dad who's an engineer). So I'm doing that again now in a less poetic, more literal way.

...I would imagine that clients are terrible everywhere. Anytime a creative person is getting paid it's usually by a not creative person (hence the payment) that ultimately is in charge of the content/thing being created. I think that's pretty standard for creative industries. That's why I didn't become an architect. I get the feeling (and know enough people who can attest) that Microsoft or Starbucks are probably just as soul-crushing to work for as Procter & Gamble. And if one looks at their ads, Google and Apple or most other "cool" coastal companies are no better (I would venture to say they may be worse because of how tightly they seem to want to control their image).

Why has my character come up for debate? I think I made it very clear that I am super nice and treasured by most of the people in my life. I don't know why we have to keep having this discussion. When BRRII and I meet up for beers he'll tell you all about how magnanimous and likable of a guy I am. Several of you are even Facebook friends with me and can attest to this fact already. Fucking shit you people are difficult.

Is it fucking ski season yet?