Smigg

Not heard that song for ages, and despite my "metal" proclivities, it was a good song.

God damn, I write a long ass Sharknado pitch, just as the mini ep comes out, great timing as always haha.

Oh shit, I think I have it! I think I have Sharknado 5's story, or "Sharknado 5: Obvious 'Quint' Reference" A small scale Sharknado hits a small industrial complex in the middle of nowhere, the small area is absolutely decimated, but minimal casualties, it's deemed to be no big deal, however, a few million dollars of damage is caused, but because of the huge, catastrophic Sharknado's in the previous 4 movies, nobody really cares, just get a "Huh? That's weird?". Then a couple of weeks later, it happens again, slightly bigger, but again, industrial area, the area is damaged, but minimal casualties. People remain on High Alert, but a Presidential Advisor (played by Neal McDonough) calls for calm, these are isolated incidents, and no casualties, these areas are priorities to be rebuilt ASAP. Finn is keeping an eye on these Sharknado's, and he's baffled, there's no warning signs, these places aren't anywhere near the coast, how is all this happening?! A third Sharknado tears through Detroit, and it's HUGE, it came out of nowhere, and there's billions of dollars of damage done, people are dead, whatever remaining industry is there has been wiped out, even the Detroit Lions stadium his destroyed, but a Sharknado that size doesn't dissipate that quicky... until this one, it just disappeared, like a switch was hit, it was gone as quick as it arrived... but that can't be possible. It wasn't... but it is now... we go to a control centre, a scientist is jubilant "The third test is a rousing success, I think we can commence Operation: Hammerhead, where do you want to start?!" The camera pans around... it's Neal Fucking McDonough!! "Well, nowhere in America, there's been three of these things happen, people are going to be prepared for it... hmmm... take out somewhere in Germany, there hasn't been one there, they won't expect it" NEAL MCDONOUGH CAN CONTROL SHARKNADOS! Now there are Sharknados forming, and they're heading towards Germany, England, Austalia, Japan, China, South Korea, and wherever else has strong industry, each of them would out manufacturing, and global business. McDonough seems to know this before anybody else, before even the weather forecasters, how would a Presidential Advisor know that? Finn starts to think that McDonough is behind this, he's right, but he tells anyone, he'll be thought of as a nutcase, because "You can't control the weather, and if you could, why would they create the most devastating weather phenomena known to man?!" more importantly, where would they even carry it out without anybody noticing. Under the White House, that's where! With the world's armies preparing to provide aide to the victims of the Sharknado Barrage and evacuate major cities they're not going to welcome the Conspiracy Theorist to say "Come to the White House to kill this guy", Finn tirelessly looks through the internet, trying to find a group of mercenaries to help him take out McDonough, and he's got a group of bad asses, Danny Trejo, Steve Austin, Vinnie Jones, Michael Madsen, Rutger Hauer, Danny Dyer, Tamer Hassan, Tony Jaa and Michael Jai White. After hacking into the White House's Command Centre (somehow, don't ask me how, I'm not some fancy screen writer), he tells his Mercenaries, "You take McDonough... I'm going Shark Fishing". After being spotted, an alarm is pushed, now there's a "Terrorist Attack at the White House". The team fights through White House security, and McDonough's own guards, they're going to take McDonough out and save the day... until Vinnie Jones, Danny Dyer and Tamer Hassan turn on their partners. They were with McDonough this whole time. Vinnie Jones gets on the radio to Finn, who is in a fighter jet with Rob Riggle, says "McDonough's down, but we don't know what the fuck we're doing here, and the demolition team can't blow the command centre until we shut down these Sharknados, you need to be here to do it!" Riggle and Finn make their way to the White House, meeting the demolition team of Austin, White and Jaa, they ask what he's doing there, they heard nothing of what Jones said, so the 5 of them go into the White House to investigate, they find the command centre, as the door shuts behind them, Jones, Hassan and Dyer have rifles behind them, and they're told to drop their weapons, McDonough turns around in his comically huge "Bad Guy" chair, and Finn says "Why?! Why would you destroy the lives of billions of people?" "Supply and Demand" replies McDonough. "If I can make Sharknados, Finn, what else can I make?" "What?!" "Rain! I can make it rain!!" He clicks the button on a remote control, causing torrential downpours in Africa. "You see, rain is water, water makes plants grow, plants feed animals, and create crops, crops that can be harvested, and exported, that brings in money, that money can be invested into business, and that business exports more products, more products mean more money, which creates more business, which then means even more money... for me, you see, I have syphoned off billions of dollars of taxpayer money, without anybody even noticing, it's quite genius how I did it, but I won't waste time telling you, it doesn't matter to this part of the story, but I have invested heavily in Africa, and now, I'll make it pay off.", McDonough then clicks off the rain. "But why do you have to destroy these places" "They're my competition, if they can't compete, everybody will have to come to me. And, before you ask, 'Why Sharkados?" Well, if I was to just blow these places up, we're going to war, because I ain't taking the heat for this, if we go to war, I then have to wait to get this up and running, and even then, I can't just make it rain with a click of a button. Sharknados are "Natural Disasters", can't pick a fight over the weather. It's business, and I'm going to make a killing... after this killing of course..." and just as the turncoats raise their guns, we have the "Stupid Sharknado moment", where Steve Austin hits his "Stone Cold Stunner" finishing move And the fight in the control centre is on, the longer the fight goes, the closer the Sharknados get to forming, Finn manages to kill McDonough, and hit the abort button, just before the Sharknados really form and do any damage. Finn has saved the world, again. As Finn and a couple of his guys are walking out, one asks, are we gonna blow it up? Finn says "No, I have an idea", Finn clicks the remote to start the African rain, putting an end to the decades long draught, saving millions of lives. The command centre is actually used for good, as Nova is given a new Presidential Advisor position, working in the command centre, and using McDonough's technology to prevent weather based disasters, and to end it on a fun note, Finn calls her, says "I'm on vacation... could you do me a favour?" Nova says "Just this once, I like this job!" she turns a knob, and the weather where Finn is gets warmer, says "That's perfect" and starts sunbathing. I wrote Sharknado 5, just for the hell of it. I need a hobby.

Here's a guy who needs to be in it, Neal McDonaugh I have literally only ever seen him in ONE thing where he isn't a complete piece of shit. This guy is a career bad guy, imagine a Sharknado movie where Neal McDonaugh's the villain.

I'd also be cool with: Michael Jai White "Stone Cold" Steve Austin Tony Jaa Danny Dyer Tamar Hassan Rob Riggle (Just because I love Rob Riggle in EVERYTHING) Also, Stephanie Beatriz, because of the aforementioned "massive crush" and she needs to be in more stuff.

Going back to the movie, and bringing this thread full circle. There is actually a band called "The Sign of the Southern Cross", so perhaps they were a fan of this movie, they're pretty good, very Pantera-ish https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sKaxMWPOl2o

The problem with Sharknado is, the joke has worn REALLY thin now. The first one was organically stupid, "Hey, imagine if there was a tornado in the ocean, and it dragged the sharks up in it?" Now it's become this "Pop Culture Phenomenom" where it's becoming more about celebrity cameos, and they've managed to ruin the fun of that by announcing who's going to be making cameos.

I was think either Taker, Kalisto or one of the Usos.

Paul shared this. Now, is the kid a wrestling fan? Or is Paul the wrestling fan, and pushing it on the kid? I would LOVE it if Paul's sat there, in a John Cena shirt, saying "Son, come and join your dad!" and June is looking on horrified as Paul waves his hand in front of his face saying "You can't see me, June!" "What does that even mean, Paul?! I can see you, all you're doing is waving your hand in front of your face... no, don't make our son do it too... Paul... Paul... stop waving your hand in front of your face, it makes no sense!!"

I think you could accredit the start of "Food Porn" to Nigella Lawson, with her use of double entendre's, and just generally being a sexy bitch

Not to mention that Mania spot

The worst part for me was his foot just flopping around, indepentant of his body. Even to this day, I have a bit of a wince when guys jump off the top rope and land on their feet. Wade Barrett talked about how much he hated ladder matches, because of what happened to Sid.

I thought June was Jane Krakowski then... oooh, good name for a show "June and Jane"

I'm English, so I don't know who that is, but after reading it, It's very similar. There's another one, an English footballer by the name of David Busst, who broke his leg so badly, there was blood on the pitch, and Peter Schmeichel (the opposing goalkeeper) apparently went into counselling after seeing it.

haha, no breakages or injuries, a perfectlly executed spot. However, if you want to see a breakage (and I don't know if you would, or why you would), there was a guy named Sid Vicious, he was wresting in WCW in 2001 and the people in charge of WCW said to him "You need to do more flashy movies, you need to broaden your repetoire, so we want you to do more aerial moves". And they decided upon him jumping off the second rope and land a kick on his opponent. Sid didn't want to do the move, and they basically said "Well, I guess you don't want to work here anymore" and they coerced him into doing the move. Well, Sid Vicious is 7' tall, and weighed around 320lbs, and all that landed on one leg, which snapped in half as soon as he landed, it's one of the most graphic injuries in history, absolutely brutal.

Well, don't threaten powerbombs, that's kinda my deal... I suggest a nice Superkick

I'm going for "Ready to Rumble" starring David Arquette, Scott Caan, Oliver Platt and Rose McGowan

It's friday morning and no mini-episode yet...

Woooo! Amassing an army now!

When the Batman animated series was on, the Teletext TV guide's synopsis of the show just said "Batman: The Animated Series - Terrorist Fun"

One that sticks out for me, Josie and The Pussycats, it was on all the time on the movie channels here at the turn of the century. It was weird, because it's just such a departure from the stuff I like. I think it's down to my massive crush on Rachael Leigh Cook at the time, because I liked She's All That too. It's weird, I'd watch stuff like Commando, Rambo, Bloodsport... Josie and the Pussycats....

Yeah, that's like watching a porno, and actually watching the part where the sink breaks, and calling the plumber, and all of that before they get to the fucking.

Remember Safe Haven? Josh Dumahel trying to get Julianna Hough to listen to Slayer (although, that's Thrash Metal), I think Metal and Romance go hand in hand. In fact, there's a Black Sabbath song titled "The Sign of the Southern Cross"

The name "Southern Cross" has another interesting connotation, as it's also one of the names for an upside-down crucifix, which is seen as symbolic of Anti-Christian or even Satanic beliefs within certain groups. You see a lot of "Southern Crosses" in metal music, particularly the Black Metal and Death Metal genres. Alternatively, it's also known as the Cross of St. Peter, who requested that he be crucified upside down, as he felt he was unworthy of being crucified in the same manner as Jesus Christ. So, the significance changes depending on the manner in which it's used. My extrapolation of all of this is, the restaurant being called "Southern Cross" could either signify patronage of St. Peter's Church, or Sarah Michelle Gellar's a huge metalhead.