Smigg

No worries, glad to help out.

Okay, I need to add a correction to the Corrections and Omissions. "Sarcy" is pronounce Sar-Key with a hard C. I should have perhaps said that in my post.

It depends on where you're from, I'm from the midlands and I've heard it, and "He's a mental!" Is the punchline of a Lee Evans joke, too. Unrelated to that, when Gleeson says "Everyone's a joker, sarcastic", I have a theory that it was added in during filming. Because British and Irish people use the term "sarcy" for a comment or person that is sarcastic. So, it's not out of the realm of possibility that Gleeson ad libbed "Everyone's a joker, Sarcy!" and they realised that no one else would know what "sarcy" meant, so they added "sarcastic", which just sounds ridiculous.

Which reminds me of my "Smigg, you dumbass" moment last week, LL Cool J is in another movie called "In Too Deep", which is on Netflix UK, I watched 15 minutes of it, and wondered where the fuck the sharks were, before realising it was a completely different film. Although, that's not as bad as something that happened where I live, where parents took their kids to watch Madagascar 3, and the staff fucked up, and put on Paranormal Activity 4. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2222366/Paranormal-Activity-4-instead-Madagascar-3-shown-screaming-children-bungling-cinema-staff.html

And Con Air, another couple of good episodes.

Wasn't expecting that, spat my drink all over the keyboard.

Not to be confused with the porno parody, "Deep Screw Sea"

Then you get sexy with the Roman Numerals DEEP BIVE SEA DEEP BLVE SEA The advantage of that is you don't even need to change the title card other than maybe changing the colours of the roman numerals. Worked alright for Mortal Kombat: Annihilation, which was the exact same intro as the previous film, just with "Annihilation" tacked on.

LL Cool J should have worn this during the movie.

Dear Jo(e) (That's right, you have a guy's name! Doesn't that sting a little?!) Oh yeah, I'm sure you're very busy, with all the decomposing in the ground, and giving the devil hand jobs for special treatment. The reason it had to be "slow and passionless" ,as you called it, is because I'm still pristine down there, no kids stretching my shit out, so let's just say, he had to control himself early on, by feeling a little something called "Friction", something your boring ass relationship never had! I was his only option? Really?! Considering there are buses rolling in from both directions on the reg, filled with women who are ready to put it in their mouth, and he chose mine, exclusively! Like I said, pristine, bitch! Oh, and by the way, the only reason why I had to sacrifice the goat is because there are laws against sacrificing your first born son, the little asshole has given me nothing but shit, must be because he remembers that you spoiled his whiny ass, so just say the word, and I'll send the little fucker right down to you! I'm pretty good with a knife, just ask my ex-husband. And that little rant about your daughter is why I'm now "Mommy" to her. Check it out, I'm a "Mommy" and, once again, pristine, bitch! Did she ever call you "Mommy", oh, wait, that's right. It's funny you bring up "Trade", because that's what we're thinking of doing with that whiney douche of a son, we're gonna get a bike in return. I felt a bit weird riding your bike, and your husband. I know you're being such a douche is because the jealousy is just killing... oh yeah, too late for that to happen. Rest in Go Fuck Yourself Katherine.

He did the same shit in Bloodsport, he jumped on Ray Jackson's head, and flexed his pecs at JCVD.

That explains why the guy with the spiderweb tattoo who was where I'm from was called that.

Here's something that needs to be brought up. When Red West (Josh Dumahel's dad, I think) is in a movie where he works in a local store, the local store gets burned to the ground, and that movie is lampooned on "How Did This Get Made", here in Safe Haven, and in Road House. So, Cobie Smulders causes things to happen to parents, and Red West's store's always burn down. There seem to be as many curses coming into this movie as there are genres.

Well, I don't think he did like Slayer, considering my Slayer fandom, and being around other Slayer fans, their attitude isn't a coy "Well, you know, if you don't like Mark Twain... um... well... we have Slayer if you want..." it's more a "Why the fuck are we listening to this gay shit?! ARRRRRRGH FUCKIN' SLAAAAAAAYYYYYYYEEEERR!! If you don't like Slayer, then get the fuck out of my car... ya bitch!" before opening her car door, and shoving her out onto the side of the road, whilst speeding off with "Angel of Death" at full volume. Although, I may be generalising. If his wife was the Slayer fan, that would make the movie fucking awesome; "Honey, I just want one thing when the time comes." "What's that, baby?" "At my funeral, would you play "Dead Skin Mask" off the 'Seasons in the Abyss' album?" "No, that's just weird, it would be a funeral, I don't think it's right to play a song with the title 'Dead Skin Mask', at a funeral" "Raining Blood?" "No Slayer at the funeral!" "If you don't like Slayer, then get the fuck out of my hospital ward... ya bitch!" Then she opens the door, shoves him out, whilst turning up "Angel of Death" at full volume.

Did he actually like Slayer? He seemed to be pretty negative at the thought of listening to Slayer. I can't see why anyone would be negative about it, Slayer are fantastic.

I'm interested in the story of "Bolo", the guy on the other wanted poster next to Katie/Erin. In my experience, a guy named "Bolo" has a story to tell. I know of two Bolo's in my life. Bolo Yeung - The legendary Martial Arts star playing the iconic "Chong-Li" in Bloodsport. There was also a guy named "Bolo" where I lived, a local criminal/supposed hardman, with a completely shaved head (no eyebrows either), with a spiderweb tattooed on his ENTIRE head, there was a story about him tearing up a Job Centre after getting annoyed that they wouldn't pay him his benefits, after his excuse for not even looking for a job being "They're not gonna give a job to a bloke with a fucking spiderweb on his face, so what's the point in looking for a fucking job!" He got arrested seemingly weekly until he got stabbed in the neck in a bar fight. So, with a name with that track record, I wanted to see what "Bolo" was doing.

I haven't heard the episode, yet, so just ignore this point if it has already been made. But there were times where David Lyons (Katie's Husband) looked like he was trying way to hard to come across like Robert Patrick's T-1000 in Terminator 2, to the point of me thinking his finger was gonna turn into a spike and poke through that old lady's head. Also, "Jo" being dead all along seemed somewhat ironic. The "mother" of the movie, being dead all along, and Cobie Smulders being in the equation. I was half expecting Josh Dumahel to start sounding like Bob Saget. Whenever Cobie Smulders is involved, something seems to happen to someone's parents. Safe Haven - She was dead all along and her husband's business is burned to the ground. How I Met Your Mother - The mother was dead all along Walking Tall - The Rock's dad's house gets invaded by the bad guys Delivery Man - Vince Vaughan gets sued by 140 people he fathered thanks to a fuck up at a fertility clinic, If Cobie Smulders is involved, some shit's gonna happen to someone's parental unit!

Oh god, don't get me started on Pikeys, as they say in Snatch, "I fucking hate Pikeys". In fact, too late, I've opened my own floodgates. Here's what it's like dealing with Pikeys: I was outside my house, changing the light, I had a step ladder (these are important to the story, so remember one thing, "Ladder"). This open top truck turns out, they're "scrap metal dealers" (read that as 'Thieving Pikey Fuck-Knuckles'). Now, this particular summer, we had them EVERY single day (sometimes twice, just to check to see if there's anything they can take, and are absolutely NOT casing the street), with a megaphone, shouting "SCRAP METAL", which seem to be the only words that they can say that even come close to proper english. So, one of them gets out, and I hear what can only be transcribed as "Hoyoo! Eh yeh neen em lahz!" (Now, I shall translate, "Hello good sir, I see that you have a set of ladders, I attempt to make money by taking metallic things for free and selling them on, do you need those ladders?") At the time, I didn't speak the language, so I asked him to repeat himself, he said "Lahz, yeh neem?" ("Those ladders, are they of use to you?"), I still didn't understand and he said "Eh deff eh sum" ("Are you hard of hearing?"). He then pointed and said "LAH DUZ! YAH WANNUM?!" At this point, having had these cretins showing up around 10 times a week, and the fact that I was fucking using them while he was asking to take them, I said "No mate, it's alright, I can levitate!" It seems like sarcasm isn't understood by these people, and he actually thought I was letting him have them.

Genius, fucking genius!

I wish I could say I'm not gonna jerk off to this...

I actually have Hercules in New York on DVD, it was the best 70p I ever spent.

Is Olivia Newton-John, Nyan Cat?!