(EDIT SINCE REPLY WONT WORK, I am actually a fan of Scott Aukerman, and want to preface this entire post by saying I am actually a fan of his and bear him no ill will or disrespect for not liking Phish. I am so desensitized to the word faggot that it could be a synonym for "square" in my vocabulary. Obviously this isn't the case for everyone, and I apologize)
Harris, you've really neglected studio stuff so far in the podcasts. I know Phish is is a live band predominantly, but I think this is a huge mistake in your approach because Scott, being a huge (EDIT FOR OFFENSIVENESS: HOW'S *GOOBER*?) (endearingly), has shown himself to be more inclined to enjoy the standard 4-7 minute song format with non-improvised solos, if any. (EDIT: THIS IS NOT AN INSULT) . The studio selection of Phish is more than enough to get most any listener to at least recognize that Phish is a band with a solid selection of objectively good songs, and perhaps forge an emotional connection to some of them. I think live clips should be kept limited to either Letterman performances or very solid performances of non-jamming songs for the time being. I'm talkin' Army of One, Horn, Gumbo, maybe an exceptional but short Alumni Blues, that kinda stuff.
That being said, I'm gonna go through each studio album and maybe one live show and mention the songs that are noteworthy in my opinion, in terms of swaying Scott. I'll try to keep my comments as objective as I can, but they are based on my own opinion.
Bug - Good lyrics, good music, I'd give it a 60/40 chance in favor of him liking it.
Heavy Things - Absolutely bitchin guitar solo towards the end of the song. Average to pretty good lyrics throughout
Dirt - Such a good song. If the Beatles had written it people would beat off to it. Catchy as fuck, and very emotional lyrics.
Inlaw Josie Wales - This song is just Trey being a boss at guitar, take it or leave it.
Undermind - This one's hit or miss for Scott I would guess, but it's funky as shit and has wacky lyrics that actually make sense. Take that, bitch.
The Connection - Not much special about this one, but it's a pretty good song all around.
Scents and Subtle Sounds - This is such a tripping song, if you could dose him out before the show he'd probably appreciate the lyrics way more, but that's probably a long shot.
Secret Smile - Great imagery and accompanying music in this one, the heartbeat thing in the studio version is a little weird but a very good song overall.
Friday - He might not like the singing in this one, but the lyrics are quality, as is the musical side of things.
All of These Dreams - Another lyrical powerhouse IMO, but they might seem silly to Scott. At the very least it's a pretty song musically. He'll probably bitch about the singing.
The Story of the Ghost
Brian and Robert - This is probably the only song on the album I wouldn't consider to be too risky to play. Very sad tune. If you've ever been a loner or depressed, you'll fuckin get this one.
Waste - Beautiful song, musically and lyrically. I'd be surprised if he didn't at least kind of like it.
Taste - Risky song to bring up, but it could go over well, who knows.
Cars Trucks Buses - This is just a fun, groovy song. If he saw it live there's no way he wouldn't move around, but the studio version is a good safe taste of it.
Free - What this song loses in lyric silliness (it's only silly if you've never been on nitrous while tripping, but that's druggie talk) it makes up for in straight up catchiness and badassery in the soloing.
Julius - You played this at the end of one of the shows and I don't know how Scott reacted, but it's still a great song worth mentioning again. Fuck him if he didn't like it (EDIT: OBVIOUSLY I DON'T ACTUALLY MEAN THIS PEOPLE). The 95 Letterman performance of this song is fuckin killer by the way.
Down With Disease - The chorus/solo of this song is just a big ol party. Lot of fun, good lyrics as well. One of my personal favorites. Having lost family to cancer adds a good spin on it to me.
Lifeboy - Possibly some of Phish's saddest lyrics, but a lovely song in any case. I think it would be hard to hate on this one.
A Picture of Nectar
Guelah Papyrus - Boy, this one is risky to even mention. Has an excellent groove throughout and a sweet piano/guitar fugue though. Questionable lyrics if you aren't tripping balls. If you are though, shit makes perfect sense.
Stash - Lyrics in the same boat as Guelah, but otherwise this could almost be a Santana song.
Magilla - This one might be seen as a little hokey, but I think it's a sweet little jazzy tune that shows off some of Phish's musical versatility.
Lawn Boy - Another good jazzy type tune. Lyrics are very evocative and sensual, if nothing else.
Bouncing Around the Room - Classic Phish, catchy song and fun to shift your attention to the different parts of the round throughout. You played it in one episode but skipped the entire building up of the round, that's what makes the song for me, personally.
YEM - You know what to do.
Divided Sky - I'd recommend starting this one 2 minutes in just so Nick Thorburn can't bitch about that one silly part before it actually gets awesome.
Fee - Silly lyrics, but catchy ass chorus.
Ocelot - Fun song, if he likes it this it would also be a good one to transition him onto some longer, but manageable live jams.
Stealing Time From the Faulty Plan - This one's just a good old fashioned facemelter. The lyrics aren't the best but if you complain about them you're just looking for stuff to shit on.
Joy - Good lyrics, good music. Pretty sure this one is at least partly about Trey's sister's cancer, so keep that in mind.
7/17/13 Alpharetta - Gumbo
8/15/11 UIC - Alumni Blues
Anyway, those are my song suggestions for getting Scott Aukerman to like Phish. I doubt Harris will actually read this, but that would be pretty sweet if he did and found it useful in any sense of the word. Feel free to think tank or just shit on this thread, people. I don't really care.
Also get that man some proper fucking LSD for the next show he attends. None of this moon rock shit please.