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Blast Hardcheese

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Everything posted by Blast Hardcheese

  1. Blast Hardcheese

    The Amazing Spider-Man 2

    Considering that June liked the first Amazing Spider-Man movie, I'd like to here her take on this one.
  2. Blast Hardcheese

    Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 (2000)

    I just got into an argument the other night with a Wiccan-goth who swore up and down that this film "...faithfully represents my people." Kind of like how Battlefield Earth represents Scientologists, I suppose.
  3. Blast Hardcheese

    Spawn (1997)

    I remember seeing this in the theater when it was released. It had the look and feel of a movie the producers were cobbling together as they went along. Like when a child tells you a story with a bunch of "...and then..."'s tossed in. Just fuckin' awful.
  4. Blast Hardcheese

    Quicksilver

    Why do these extreme sports movies always seem to have a criminal slant to them? Quicksilver, Gleaming the Cube, and Premium Rush each features a plot revolving around a crime element thwarted by the extreme sport showcased in the film.
  5. Blast Hardcheese

    Chappie (2015)

    Did anyone catch the episode of @Midnight last week with Matt Mira making both Chappie and breadsticks his answers for nearly question he was asked? He should be the guest if HDTGM reviews this movie. I'm interested to hear if he was disappointed with it or not.
  6. Blast Hardcheese

    Kingsman: The Secret Service

    The overall thesis statement of this movie was how much more fun those old Roger Moore-era James Bond films were, and how dour and super-serious modern Bond films have become. And while this film definitely makes a good point (not every action film has to be Nolan-ized), the execution is so ham-fisted and obvious that the seams show. I walked out of this movie feeling tired and disappointed. As a friend of mine put it: This is either a clever movie for dumb people, or a dumb movie for clever people.
  7. Blast Hardcheese

    Christian Mingle: The Movie (2014)

    This trailer: take a drink for every record-scatch faux pas stinger.
  8. Blast Hardcheese

    Legend (1985)

    This film also has the distinction of being the production that burned down the 007 Soundstage at Pinewood Studios. Fuckin' unicorns!
  9. Blast Hardcheese

    John Wick (2014)

    Honestly, John Wick was the best, most satisfying movie I saw last year. The hyper reality of this world was slick, but they didn't go too overboard with it. Keanu Reeves was surprisingly great in this: the man can brood. And this movie had little moments of levity and humor, which were all well placed: the scene in the night club, where Wick is blasting a baddie, run out of bullets, reloads, and finishes plugging bullets into an unfortunate flunky was inspired (the balancing act look on Reeves' face was pitch perfect). Yeah, I can't wait for the sequel, either.
  10. Blast Hardcheese

    Kingsman: The Secret Service

    I hated how this film kept reminding you how clever it thought it was. Like that "nudge-nudge, wink-wink" sketch from Monty Pythons. Austin Powers, minus the fun/plus the Big Macs. Of course, admitting to not liking the movie is tantimount to "...not knowing how to have fun." So, keep your disdain for this movie hush-hush, my fellow killjoy.
  11. Blast Hardcheese

    What a Girl Wants (2003)

    Wait! That's not the entire title of this movie?
  12. Blast Hardcheese

    Fantastic Mr. Fox

    I'm afraid we're through the looking glass, jarrycanada. This Bad Movie Recommendation is HOT now.
  13. I did first see this film when I was a kid. It was, at that point, the most bizarrely fun movie I had ever seen. Watching it again as an adult, the fun was there, but so was the schlockiness. I can't see a picture like this getting made in todays movie-making climate, if for no other reason than it's wholly original and takes a lot of chances. I like that the movie just drops us in this world, asking us to accept that our hero is an already well established and ultra famous scientist/spy/rockstar/ninja/fashion plate/etc, with a loyal following and a network of colorfully named and outfitted cohorts (I had the biggest crush on the chiseled blonde dude in BB's gang when I was younger, and still kinda do today). Action, humor, and WTF moment, akimbo. It's all in there, wrapped in a theme song that will burrow its way through your skull. (((BUMP))) again!
  14. I LOVE this movie, and would enjoy hearing it discussed by Paul, June, Jason and guest (I'd pick Paul F. Tompkins). This movie defines bananas filmmaking, but it all somehow works. Like a hyper-creative, comic book-addict's script come to celluloid life. The "Wait, stop the song, is... somebody crying out there?" scene is brilliant. Like the rest of this fun, highly entertaining and crazy film, this scene just goes for the gold with gusto.
  15. Blast Hardcheese

    Joe Versus the Volcano (1990)

    A strange movie, but good a good one.
  16. Blast Hardcheese

    Johnny Mnemonic (1995)

    What a sloppy digital mess this film is. When the movie gets to the wired-up hyper-intelligent dolphin in a giant fish tank watching multiple ceiling-hung televisions, and I just about lost it. Upon seeing this set, William Gibson (the writer of the book this movie is based on, as well as the "Father of Cyberpunk") said the filmmakers realized what he envisioned in his book expertly. So, at least one person really liked this film.
  17. Blast Hardcheese

    The Pest (1997)

    For some reason I always associate this movie and Freddie Got Fingered with each other. What fresh hell that double bill would be.
  18. Blast Hardcheese

    Hard Rain (1998)

    Speaking of Christian Slater, has anyone seen the skateboarding murder mystery "thriller" Gleaming the Cube in a while? I saw it on VHS in high school, and remember it being mediocre-to-lame at the time.
  19. Blast Hardcheese

    Fantastic Mr. Fox

    I'll agree with you that this movie is amazing. The painstaking stop motion animation is reason alone to celebrate this movie. But on How Did This Get Made? What makes this show for me is the dissection of mind-bogglingly crazy movies. Those movie so over-the-top awful - or in those rare instances of praise/stunned wonder for films such as Fast & Furious, Punisher: Warzone and Crank 1 and 2 - that need three highly funny and analytical comedians to make sense out of those films that make no sense. That right there is the thesis statement of this podcast. To go into dissection mode on a film like Fantastic Mr. Fox - a great film, but not one that anyone (besides the OP) would consider "bonkers" - I feel misses the point of this podcast. Sorry, but I don't see this movie happening on HDTGM anytime, like, ever.
  20. Blast Hardcheese

    Fantastic Mr. Fox

    I didn't call the OP a hipster: I simply stated that clowning on Wes Anderson movies is par for the course, suggesting that people who ridicule something as being irksomely homogeneous are, ironically, engaing in a groupthink activity. The OP is of course entitled to their opinion, but their suggestion that Fantastic Mr. Fox is ripe for HDTGM discussion simply seems like yet another eyerollingly misguided and tonedeaf recommendation. I mean, unless of course you agree with the OP and think Fantastic Mr. Fox is unbelievably bad and should be the movie Paul, June and Jason discuss/pillory. Do you?
  21. Blast Hardcheese

    Fantastic Mr. Fox

    So, as long as we're suggesting perfectly acceptable movie based on opinion rather than overwhelming proof of incompetent filmmaking, I would like to suggest Kingsman: The Secret Service, one of the most smug, psuedo-clever and hollow films I've ever had the displeasure of watching. This white trash James Bond send-up is either a clever movie for stupid people, or a stupid movie for clever people. Oh, what's that? You actually liked this film? Thought is was one of the best films you've ever seen? And so do a whole lot of other moviegoers?!? Well, tough titties! Because this bad movie suggestion board is now reserved for movies that simply annoyed a small miniority of us. Wa-Wah...
  22. Blast Hardcheese

    Fantastic Mr. Fox

    Well, yeah, no shit. But this film doesn't deserve the HDTGM treatment. It's not like it's bananas, bonkers bad. Imagine how boring and tepid that episode would be. Face/Off is the line in the sand for this podcast. Fuckin' Face/Off! And that even has Nick Cage in it!!! Think about that.
  23. Blast Hardcheese

    Fantastic Mr. Fox

    #IgnoranceBrag Seriously you know you're in the minority with your opinion, right? More so for recommending this film for a HDTGM bad movie takedown. I finally got around to seeing Gone Girl last night, and despite the gaping plot holes (of which there were so, so, SO many) that annoyed me to no end hours after seeing this movie, I still wouldn't recommend that film for HDTGM. The reason is simple: despite this film's slapdash script, it was still well made, acted and directed. I get that Fanastic Mr. Fox irked you, but you can't say it was a poorly made film. When compared to, say, Spider-Man 3 or Batman & Robin - where all cyliders of these horrible movies simply aren't firing, this film (with its glowing reviews and accolades) which you didn't find enjoyable and are now recommending here misses the point of this podcast completely. I can't say I disagree with you on that, Lando. Anderson has become a twee/hipster cinematic poster boy, whether he likes it or not. Still, he's a talented filmmaker and a good storyteller, so there's that.
  24. Blast Hardcheese

    Fantastic Mr. Fox

    Agreed.
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