RyanWright

Bobby Daring always did way cooler stunts than Evil Knievel.

showshowbro, I am snapping my fingers in applause. Let's see if they are #ArmyStrong enough to survive that poetry slam. Freakin posers Also, wanted to make any new comers aware that a lot of us are "friends" on FB so get cool about it and check that out. I'm Ryan Wright in NC. if you have any trouble finding me, I am the one that is incredibly attractive, funny, talented, and has like the most dreamy eyes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IiRBvgxuD3k This song is literally about driving "Mini Fast Car"

Um, I remember pooping myself a bunch and not being able to walk very well but I guess that could go either way really.

Yes. Yes I did and I've never really been able to open up to anyone about it. Most people can't understand a life of being unwanted. Always wishing you had a warm sheltered place to call home, to belong to somewhere, and to be needed by someone. I try to be tough and conceal my wounds with comedy but for years I felt like I was in constant free fall. Honestly I am afraid to even let my mind drift back to those days... You have changed all of that though, my beautiful, wonderful Valerie Bryant, you are amazing and one of a kind. Having a future with you in it makes the harshness of my past disappear. When I think of you I feel safe, and I am brave, and in your eyes I finally know where I belong. *Suck it [ redacted], it's over man. **No really I hope I didn't cross any lines here **Seriously just a bit, unless it works. In that case I meant every word. Including the suck it part

I don't know how to put pics in like all you cool people do okay?! I admit it...I need help please. Also there is very little photographic evidence that I was ever a child. Maybe it's because my mom never loved me or because I grew up in an orphanage, I can only guess but probably at least one of those. thanks for noticing the drapes. at the time I was saving up but ultimately had 4 drapes. also you are the third person in my life to call me that BTW: I ALWAYS get top billing in posts and you better watch it McGurly man! j/k p.s. I bet Hayes thinks that 'top billing' is when he uses too many minutes on his phone plan I am out of likes as well, when will earwolf end this insanity?!

I would join your cult if there was less Plato and more Play-Doh

Niiiice. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn?

I thought this had already been established. Just like I told all of my friends at the time, she is a super model that lives in canada and travels a lot for her job but every summer when school is out she stays with me and we're in love. get over it

Yes that is a pearl jam shirt and my super hot gf is juuuust out of frame...

when the gf tips never came, I started to think that S+H were just like straight up liars. But then it hit me... that is the advice. My new strategy is to just make shit up. From now on, I am a big deal rich guy that do's movies and do's Hollywoods and doesn't give an F. Plus, I think a lot of those tips from valeriebryant really carry over into adulthood A great RSS moment is reading the news like joey from the amazing race "Hallelujah! The Cheese!"

I think it is so boss that Sean and Hayes refuse to go to the Emmy's even though they were definitely invited and do basically all movies and feelms... well all the good shit anyway looks like chris hardwick found a host slot empty though. Ever notice how the words he says don't really match the contortions his mouth makes? it's like he is being badly dubbed but in his native language

{50's Ritchie Valens "we belong together" plays softly in the background} Dear Hayes and Sean, I am writing to ask for advice. I have posted to your internet fan forum several times and subscribed on itunes, but I still haven't been able to find a girlfriend. I always make sure to brag to the ladies about how famous and popular I am on the boards. I have even told some girls that I know you guys IRL and that we're all best friends so they'll think I am cool, but the only responses I get are like "that sounds so lame" or "who is that? never heard of 'em". I am so confused and almost everyone on the forum is dudes. I very much like bazongas and would like to find a pair to call my own. please help Love, down and out in durham

I'm back in the Popcorn Gallery Baby! Oh Yea! can't wait to get the residuals off that one! thanks for the pics, what a great time I missed! Did Hayes & Sean stick around and sign boobs? or did they whisk away on the helicopter/boat/house/boat? Bring it to the east coast next time and maybe leave pete holmes though. no one talks about Hayes' face that way

How's this for a character idea? I make great russian accent, so I'm a mail order husband bought by the lead singer of feminist punk rock group as an ironic protest toward the treatment of women. she doesn't love me, in fact she's lesbian, and I'm forced to tour with her band or go back to the gulag. I'm confused, uneducated, oblivious, but thankful to be in Amerika, home of free, land of braves

showshowbro, I caught the last hour of your show today and it was very funny man. I usually have to work Saturdays so I've only been able to hear bits and pieces. is there an archive I could find? I'd love to call in sometime and just shoot the shit or like if you want to come up with a skit beforehand. if you'd be interested I am up for anything. plus i do karate too but I pronounce it like Care-rah-tay

You know what you did. All you Seattleites are the same, dave matthews wrote a whole big song about it

Popcorn Question... ooooh pick me pick me Jessica Williams, why's it called news when all the stories has already happened? that makes no sense, I mean "new" is right there in the word but it's actually is old

apparently togetherness isn't a popular pov with you monsters. I still refuse to join your rival gangs but I would like to offer my services as a drug dealer to both sides. if you can snort, eat, inject, or smoke it, I have it. I only deal in the metric system so don't contact me with that nickel and dime bullshit. word of advice to the gang leaders, I'd keep an eye on timtreese the forum police, if anyone on here is a narc it's him ps chanson I will never say anything good about you again. I thought your posts were funny but actually I hate them and seattle is stupid and is full of shitty people, most of all you

I'm more of a lone earwolf and gargoyles has a disney saturday morning cartoon vibe to me. The forum is stronger united. I like all of you. Some more than others of course, and also that ged guy from a while back creeped me out. I hope he finds solace in posting to 'missed connections' on CL though. a lot of posts here are good and some are great but they are all archived. let's find unity in our favorite past posts or post-posts? Chanson had one that cracked my whole shit up where he explained seanhayes vs. hayesean when it was revealed that sean and hayes are not actual people that are our "friends" they are more of a brand. I couldn't find it but I think it's an rss thread. one love, ingrates valerie bryant, yes you are the "some more than others"

Aw man I remember the first time I saw his Scottish story of golf stand up as a kid it was Love at first laugh. so sad Big forum hug to you all

all of my dishes are dirty so naturally I throw them away and go to the store to buy some more. After listening to this ep I was shocked to find that tostitos is still on the shelf. I felt lied to and betrayed at first, but then I realized that I could use tostitos scoops in place of spoons. what a day

Ooooo Booyah! My last post got a Hayes' like! I bet all you dipshits that didn't like it feel pretty stupid now huh? well good you should... Johnny Timburton, when you come up with a funny joke in your head, do you think some of the hilarity is lost in translation when you say it out loud to other people? if so, does this mean that your jokes will always be funnier to you than anyone else?

That sounds terrifying, those guys can tread water for like 10 minutes straight. I couldn't escape by land or sea my only recourse would be to fake drowning. or do you mean that he is literally a doll? like you love and respect him because his androgyny makes it impossible for him to violate your beloved cousin? regardless man don't fret, I am way out of her league How is Claire Bear? I haven't talked to her since that night she kept introducing herself as "my so called wife" sweet girl but she comes on a little strong. I'll definitely try to get in touch though. I'm going to the Kishi Bashi show at the Visulite Theater on the 14th, you ought to check it out, he's all kinds of rad sauce. that reminds me, what has become of Freja? I think this forum has been Hamburgled!