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RyanWright

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Posts posted by RyanWright


  1. what up peeps. ive been slacking on the posts lately because I've been moving into a more "mansiony" mansion and didn't want to pull a fuggin timtreese and brag about it like it's the first castle I've lived in, please... after catching up on last week's posts I realized how much I am needed and possibly, the only one brave enough to post your faces off. Not that I'm a hero, but I mean I kinda am

     

    Hot Damneron! Matt Cameron is back! what happened to the Hollywood Handbookbook? that was a great idea. I'll be in Charlotte next week man, let's meet up for a photo op. meetup selfies bring crazy likes on here and you legally have to because it's in the earwolf terms of service agreement

     

    Chanson, I have been arrested several times, though not recently. Once wearing only undies, once I was maced, and once i was tazed but only one prod hooked in so psshh try again coppers. Oh, and tell your little cousin I said "Uhh hey baby", she'll know what it means

     

    Narnold, BoB did you guys see the dreadlocks guy on Dating Naked? He showed up to the date with a raging boner, now THAT is a game changer

     

    Veebs, Uhh hey baby...

    • Like 6

  2. Thelonious, I know you just watched Keegan straight up change. the. game on Dating Naked.

     

    Oh, everyone is trying to impress the other daters in conversation? Well I guess I'll just say nothing at all. Where are you from? Oh. New York. New Jersey. Pennsylvania. Any info on your parents? Oh, I don't really know. Anything else you can tell me? I don't know.

     

    Then when he gets a few in him, time to bully and haze the nerdy guy.

     

    Get on a date you're not really feeling (Lavin reference)? Call her repulsive over and over then force a zip lining accident that fucks up her face and then smile about it.

     

    Can't say enough about Keegan. Nut bag redhead chick that flipped everyone off and told them to suck it and said "fuck vh1" will be the story, but for me, the Keeger stole the show.

    I agree Brozo, though I can't tell if he had a plan or if that's just how Keeg Kong gets down. We know he pick up heavy things and that he is so conceited that he comes across as shy, which is impressive. not sure if he employed enough strategy to make it into the Hall of Game Changers2.0(pat. pend) but he holds the title of first guy on the show to get a hard on during the date. Certainly he belongs in the coveted Hall of Fame Boners2.0© (was there ever a 1.0?)

    Regardless, this show is good. Escaped mental patient, Katie was equally amusing. I believe that she didn't really understand the object of the show, like maybe she thought the idea is to not hook up with any of the contestants but instead to fuck the host. Which understandably seems like a loftier goal. well, she did try to bang that middle of the road dude but he escaped. You know the whole time they were making out he was thinking "okay man, you have to hang in there long enough to not seem homo in front of the cameras, as soon as she turns her back, you run for the hills" But who am I kidding? the truth is that she reminds me of so many of my exes that I don't want to admit to myself how psychotic she really is. Dating Naked has me looking at the man in the mirror, bravo vh1 bravo

    • Like 3

  3. On another topic, normally I would never plug another potty on this board but I have been listening to 'the x files files' which is cool because they totally stole the idea for the name from 'the reality show show' and it's about the x files which I love because I am just such a big nerd like that and stuff. On a recent ep they said that chris carter use to go onto a x files forum pretending to be someone else in order to get honest feedback about the show. I wonder if Sean and Hayes do that?

    • Like 5

  4. what is up friendos? I hope you’re all keepin it real. Dating Naked was back

    this week and badabababaaa… I’m lovin it. Next week’s teaser looks promising

    too, apparently one of the contestants is an escaped mental patient.

     

    I vote these two the winners of this ep

     

    Ashley - Southern belle bringing it country strong! I am born and raised in the south and I have no doubt that this Dixieland delight straight up rocks worlds. It takes a man like me that has a certain let’s just say, “confederate constitution” to handle a fine farm girl like this. Yankees need not apply.

     

    Stephen - now this aussie knows how to have a good time. all of the jokes he cracked bussed my whole shit up, and the schtick he did about eating the chili peppers then puking them up like a little baby and the water skiing with his face really had me loffing.

     

    btw I couldn’t possibly rank RSS or HH shows. each one is a special special friend that is there for me everytime people friends let me down… ps I dont have any people friends, it's very likely I am imagining all of you.

    • Like 5

  5. friends, I come to you with very disturbing news. It has been brought to my attention that, not only do monsters want to eat us and rip off our arms, but they are also sometimes wanting to have parties and do dancing. so the next time your little cousin Justin calls you and wants you to go to a "very happening party, bro" with him, you may want to make sure it is not actually a 'monster mash'. it was a harrowing experience that we barely escaped from with our lives...

     

    survival tip: "argh! fire bad" - frankensteins

     

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2PoSljk8cE

    • Like 4

  6. You guys,

    I turn fucking 30 on monday. I'm going to be 'an old'.

     

    I have been 'an old' for a couple of weeks now and it's not so bad man. the dirty 30's are when you are entering the prime of your life as a man. you'll have greater success on many different levels in the next decade than you ever have. and if this show has taught me anything it's that the older you get, the more bad guys you can beat up so maybe it's time to become a secret agent or superhero vigilante. anyways, i have to go take my metamucil now but keep your head up burd man! solidarity brother

     

    popcorn question:

     

    Dear Alex Bortelstein,

    You are a woman, so why does your name look a like a man's?

    • Like 2

  7. Is that on Video Hits One?

    Indeed

     

    I'm not sure if having a variey of people as opposed to developing longer story lines will be good or bad

    but I enjoyed it. first impressions:

     

    weewee - she sweats desperation, jealousy, and is overbearing which makes her easily manipulated. that being said, she seems genuine and loyal. I would def hit it... with my wee wee

     

    joe - appears to have grown up somewhere like just slightly left of jersey shore. i cant say much bad about the guy, he busted out some dope rhymes and that giant jesus tat was judging my mortal soul.

     

    jasmine - shallow, immature, and narcissistic but of course, I would take her on a magic carpet ride that aladdin has never even heard of before. she will make some old rich guy very happy one day

     

    jack - oh? creepy paleface man boy with daddy issues? yea he blended in well with the other set props and doesn't remind me of a dracular at all.

     

    crissy - straight up nubian princess. this chick is wifey material. sexy, sense of humor, musical, intelligent, and an accent to match. she dodged a bullet, no one on this episode was even in her league

     

    justice - i obviously don't believe that is your real name. a professional 'headliner'? what is he a hat? he reminded me of jay z but without the money, swag, or charm. plus he had the smallest censor pixel <---dick joke

     

    thoughts?

    • Like 4

  8. Nerds is cool now. My best friend, who, as I have previously mentioned, is a dick, has a girlfriend and he's is good at computers also as well. And I don't have a girlfriend and I am not good at computers. So that's an interesting fact.

     

    that is interesting. maybe your friend could make you a computer gf like in weird science

    edit: I have been binge watching old movies. tbh I've spent too much time with it and about $400 on spaghetti

    • Like 4

  9. I would like to do a MST3K style segment. Choosing movies that aren't irrelevant but old enough for nostalgia. we could maybe just select certain 5/15/30 min segments to riff on. It's easy to find the difficulties but I think logistically this would be reasonably easy to manage and to communicate with each other. like we could vote on a movie or 2 and each watch it and time stamp each joke made then just voice record our comments individually then layer them on the finished product. Or you all could just come to my house and have a movie night. idk, either way I would say a show with diverse segments would grant us more freedom creatively and not compromise anything by having to adhere to what would eventually become canon. I mean recurring segments but not necessarily consecutive ones.

    short 'kids in the hall' type skits would cool too. some ideas ive had while typing this would be, like a guy that drives a motorcycle ALL the time simply for the coolness factor and when he has to get off he always carries his helmet around just to make sure everyone knows he has a motorcycle. of course he takes mc ownership it waaay too seriously

    or an annoying office co worker that is seemingly inept and spastic at typing and any other menial task but operates at a more than proficient level and produces more than anyone else by some karmic balance of the universe. Like he or she existence is so unfortunate in the traditional sense that nature must counteract by granting extreme luck or fotune.

    I'm down for whatever though really just spitballin

    • Like 2

  10. Cogent points all around, I agree with most of what's been said. At this point I am using my job (man whore) as a means to get by while I work on the things that I love to do until I can figure out a way to create a job that is doing those things. I'm hopeful that I will succeed.

    In other news, I have been rewatching late 80's early 90's movies. After watching 'Encino Man' I have decided that it would be a good idea and cool social experiment to bring back Pauly Shore catchphrases, bud-dy. I will blend them into average conversations colloquially and track their progression through society. so look forward to 'weezin the juice', spooky wolf howls, scary weasel sounds, and adding 'age' as a suffix to any word you wish to emphasize, coming to your townage soon.

     

    p.s. there should be more talk about how cool of a guy I am, just a suggestion...

    • Like 7

  11. Don't forget about 'The Maxxxxxxx'

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Maxx

    aw man the maxx was great. I know it's animated but his jungle queen / gf julie winters gave me more than one confusing pre adolescent cartoon boner. the whole mtv oddities block of shows was super cool.

     

    Guest Request: Kumail Nanjiani, he has a great sense of humor which would make, I think, for an interesting dynamic with the Bros. I went to his christmas eve eve show last year and it was awesome. Afterwards, he hung out with me IRL and we smoked a blunt while trying to evade his in laws. It's nice to meet someone you admire and they turn out to be even cooler than you thought I'll never forget it

    • Like 3

  12. I would enjoy collaborating if anyone is interested. I have no experience but as I'm sure

    most of you are aware, me write good. I am make jokes. script are most funny . ooh pick me

     

    Sorry everyone.

    and who the hell let sam in here? don't expect any special treatment just because you're sean's cousin,

    keep your orfiss shut and just stick to 'liking' ALL of my posts. Also, tell sean how cool I am... often

    • Like 4

  13. mean detective, your name is funny to me, keep up the good work

     

    fatty2dicks, Uhh I'm going to need some actual proof. How do I know that you aren't some madman that has the real mbop duct taped and chained to a chair in a basement? His only hope of rescue being the foolish idea that his beloved forum will notice his absence, that could take weeks

    • Like 4
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