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RyanWright

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Posts posted by RyanWright

  4. Posted

    this corrdry incident could not stand. sensei sean and hayes developed the marshall art of powerful moves.

    timsvlog - lovin the enthusiasm i can tell you really get it

    huglife - lol (loffed out loud) also, its not really the role of this post to take a position either way on that clip, granted timsvlog may be a horrible racist, but theres valid arguments on both sides.

    michealbayofpigs - thanks for picking up on that I was dictating to Siri because my stenographer called in sick today.

    greggy - its all in good fun besides thats prob the most traffic that forum has had in months. suckin on deez was inevitable

     

    Sidenote

    Kali Kazoo has a new song titled "Clem"... think ClemDawg is hittin that?

    warning: fartgun violence

    http://vimeo.com/77719126

    • Like 4

  6. Posted

    Abhorrent would serve as a great synonym for this show . The host has created a new level of ego that combines traditional narcissism with a weak willed passive aggressiveness. Painstakingly, kp navigates the interviews in search of any opportunity to colloquially interject a boring story that inevitably highlights self importance or affirms that oh yes of course kp knows exactly what the guest is talking about and has been there before. Dude you are the ocular albino from Wayne's World 2. I hope you didnt strain your shakespearean acting muscle on that roll. Nearly 200 episodes, try to focus on analyzing the talent you are lucky enough to speak with.

    • Like 2

  8. Posted

    Great episode...a little dirty, I had to put on my head phones when my mom walked by...whew close calls.

     

    I bet Hayes has a spot on Bugs Bunny impression

     

    Whats up with this powerful move from Kevin Pollack?? Nate C. the same week as HwoodHbook has Rob C.??

    Wayne's World was a while back therre bud, stay in your league, which is the pee wees. S+H might just cross all the Ts and dot all the lower case j's you freaky ocular albino

     

    Helicopter crashed in Seattle. I hope it wasnt one of Chanson's I know he has them just pick him up right off the side of the street bc fug taxis...you there guy?

    http://westseattleblog.com/2014/03/downtown-emergency-helicopter-crash-near-seattle-center/

    • Like 7

  12. Posted

     

    I have a serious question for all the Scoop Troopers, though: if you had a jet and it would fly you anywhere in the world, but you had to stay at that destination for the rest of your life, where would it be?

     

    Antigua is the obvious answer but I have to go with Iceland. total pop. around 300,000 and they have a secret fairy language case closed

    • Like 3

  13. Posted

    My new agent just called claiming that I need to come up with a cool hip name and start a brand around it

    I'm not so sure about this suggestion list though:

     

    FeloniousFunk: dangerous and sexy. so funky, its a crime; so criminal, its a felony

     

    ColonialistHunk: picture Melly Gibson in the Patriot

     

    ThelonliestMonk: Kung Fu the legend continues

     

    JabroniousPunk: It doesnt matter what your name is jabroni !

    • Like 4

  14. Posted

    woke up this morning to 80 voice mails from every major tvs and movies production companies on earf. Everyone from Ted Turner to Adam Goodman "please write for us" and "we must own your talent" and "money is no object" over and over.

     

    Apparently, the impeccable, inimitable Sean Clements performed an emotionally stirring performance of my short sketch How Dare You on air. Furthermore, not to be outdone, the beady-eyed Hayes Portdaven also feebly attempted his own lackluster version. Needless to say, this has caused quite a stir in Hollywood back rooms.

     

    My career has rocketed through the stratosphere overnight.

     

    huglife and Freja, I know you both are already rich and famous but I believe we will all gain from this rare Hollywood Handbump

    • Like 3

  17. Posted

    It seems like S&H are way too busy doing movies and tv to ever actually pander to their fans but maybe some veteran forum members could let me know if this has been addressed somehow in the past.

    I have taken their advice on improving my networkings by hitting the basketball court. Definitely sound advice as my contacts list has tripled but with one small caveat. One guy that frequents the court seems to have it out for me. everytime I'm dribble driving the rock or swishing basket after basket, he is "accidentally" dropping an elbow to my face. im walking off the court daily with boo boos and bruises. My face is my moneymaker what should I do about this overzealous middle aged ex high school star athlete that thinks every frickin game is the NBA frickin finals?

    • Like 3

  18. Posted

    My favorite zumba instructor just found out she has breast cancer. Do you want to talk about that? Huh, TheloniousJunk?! Do you??!

     

    Or also maybe we could talk about how today my brother called someone "fruity" and that was very upsetting for me. I didn't say anything, because you know how sometimes things like that can be weird? And you know how sometimes brothers have tempers and you've been like permanently traumatized into submission from your childhood relationship with them? And so you're just like "Oh...he is? How so?"

     

    Or maybe we could talk about the time I saw a cat get hit by a car? The lady stopped and rolled down her window and said "My bad."

     

    Is this what you wanted, Junk? Tell me, Junk, is this what you were hoping to find?

    You guys go on this forum because of the soul crushing loneliness of your real lives right?

     

    Cool.

     

    At least we don't podcast right? I mean what kind of unstable narcissistic sociopaths would do something like that?

     

    Thank you all, great teamwork. the pins a needles of my ocd have subsided

     

    Valerie Bryant, you have officially cracked my whole shit up

     

    Quite frankly, breast cancer is not so bad, as far as cancers go. worst case scenario shes looking at some plastic surgery and will most likely end up with boob upgrade. Insensitive you say? the subtle narcissism in your comment was not overlooked, its only a topic because shes happens to be your favorite

     

    Your bro is gay, "fruity"? classic overcompensation

     

    that was my cat, think about how I felt. at least you got an apology

     

     

    yes, yes it is and thank you

     

    Chanson

    loneliness is the only reason I come here for sure. glad its finally out in the open. and though you display many traits of a Gargamel esque villain I find your evil exploits refreshing. at least your original. hats off to you good sir

    p.s. I have no plans of befriending you, manipulating you to gain access to your influence, and then betraying you at the last moment in a bid to takeover this forum and eventually the podcast.

    • Like 3

  21. Posted

    Have you guys ever been to 'Movies Bistro'?

     

    I tried to get a rez but I wasn't famous enough. I heard the have really fucking good palmadori, and veal parm.

    Confession time...I once disguised myself as Noah Hathaway and infiltrated the Movies Bistro. I dined on exquisite scallopini, making sure to waste most of the potions so as not to seem too eager. There was a viewing of Sherlock with Benedict Cucumberpatch Not bad but the main villan, Moriarty, reminded me of the Lucky Charms leprechaun and I found it a bit racist that his weapon of choice is explosives AND he's Irish. eventually I was found out when asked to do an 'Atreyu' impression and I said "I may not be a smart man but I know what love is"

    • Like 3

  22. Posted

    Official Earwolf Announcement: Henceforth Hollywood Handbook will be rebranded as the Hollywood Chanbook. In an official statement, Scott Anchorman said "we here at Earwolf believe that this name change will attract more donations but won't negatively influence the artistic integrity of the podcast." Anchorman went on to explain that "it will still be the same super famous bros and their what up what up spirit that listeners have come to love and adore to an unhealthy level."

     

    this will never happen because your real life name has the phonetic quality of nails on a chalkboard. plus Hollywood Chanbook is racist and would obviously have to be hosted by Jackie Chan.

    • Like 1

  23. Posted

     

    Michael B. Jordan or Michael actual Jordan?

     

    Also, glad that Chanson finally got knocked down a peg. Despite the massive coverage and name dropping he still got on this episode, it was mostly inflammatory and negative.

     

    Also also, Freja, thanks to the "Osc-ar Out Already!" segment, I have something to ask you. Will you...um...go to uh...the um...wha...sha...ossssssc...err. Never mind.

     

    Micheal B. Jordan In hindsight I see the confusion. Micheal actual Jordan played for UNC and I reside in NC. I referenced flying and he is the jumpman that soars through the air dunking slams. Let me clarify. Micheal B Jordan, or "Wallace" as some might know him, was a drug dealer that lived in the projects above me during my "streetz" days. Reppin my hood and on the corner clockin one night, he taught me how to fly. Also we smoked all the drugs. But hey, have to build street cred somehow.

     

    In addition, is it more sad that I have listened to my question (starts @ 44.50) on repeat for 4 hours because it means so much to me or because I'm so proud of myself?

    Keep in mind less than half of the post was even read aloud and Hayes mentions that it is not very good two times. All my fellow Matheletes know, 2 negatives = a positive so what he really means is that in fact, it is very good.

    • Like 6

  24. Posted

    Can't believe I was able to get a question in on the Chanson podcast. It means so much that Sean and Hayes thought so highly of it. This is a momentous day. First I'd like to thank the man upstairs... Micheal Jordan. You taught me how to fly MJ and look at me now! Also a big shout out to engineer Cody for being so inept at your job, without your inability to complete the most menial of tasks it would have been cut out, and this day may never have arrived.

    • Like 5

  25. Posted

     

    Don't play with my heart like that, you monster!

    Youre right, I was out of line. The freezer teasers just transported me back to the good ole days of movies and tvs talk. That said, there's no need to try to scare me with all this monsters talk. Only Frankensteins play with internal organs and how am I supposed to sleep tonight with that on my mind?

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