Cameron H.

I port-salut your, sir! And you’re right. There are Stiltons of cheeses to choose from.

OMG! It was all I could think about! (Sha-la-la)

No whey! Going from insects to bugs ought to be a Brieze....

And to you, my dear friend, I say...

That’s okay, Monsieur Camembert. It’s all gouda!

I’ve got an EXTREMELY nerdy (and totally unmacho) story... When I was growing up, I absolutely loved Lord of the Rings. However, as a lot of people who like to miss points like to point out, it does include a lot of walking. In it, Tolkien would write about how there would be drenching rain for days and how they would have to sleep in it without fire or food. Anyway, one day while I was reading it, the sky just opened up and started pouring. It was the kind of hard and sustained rain described in the book. It was the middle of the day, so I just went outside and (yes, like a psycho) walked in middle of the road for, like, 30 minutes. Of course, I’d been caught in the rain before, but not like that. Usually you’re running for shelter or something, but what do you do when there isn’t any shelter? What if there’s nowhere to rush to and you have to conserve your energy? I remember the clammy feeling of my shirt and jeans as they clung to my skin and the added weight as each layer became more and more saturated. My hair pressed flat against my skull, creating rivulets that cascaded down my face and neck, filling my ears, and chilling my entire body. The feeling of near blindness as the rain stung my eyeballs, and the overwhelming sense of drowning as water covered my nose and mouth. Of course, on an intellectual level, none of that was necessary. I could always just imagine how miserable it must have been. But even that brief walk gave me a better sense of what exactly that would have been like. So when it comes to those boot camp stories, I get it. I don’t really feel like it’s a macho thing. I feel like it’s a “you only think you know how bad it is, but you have no idea.”

And we're glad you joined

I have to agree with Paul. You guys are all great! The HDTGM forums are an oasis of positivity on a barren, Internet landscape. But I think that’s also a testament to Paul, Jason, and June. Not only are they funny, but it’s clear that all three of them are genuinely good and decent people. It’s no surprise to me that the people on this forum are the best of the best - because they were drawn toward the best. You are all some of the most kind, intelligent, funny, and supportive people I know. ...I don’t know how you put up with me

Congrats! Don’t sell yourself short. That was a great get

Hey guys, as I said last month, I probably won’t make this one due to it being my son’s birthday weekend. But...I seriously hate Crank so it all kind of works out. I’ll catch you all in August for Green Lantern

I know a lot of people didn’t like it, but here’s my personal defense of the voice over. In terms of storytelling, it works for me because that’s exactly the way a nineteen-year old kid who dropped out of college just to “check out” Vietnam probably would write. He’s basically “On the Road”-ing a war, so I can forgive him for being a bit over-the-top. That’s definitely how I used to write in college. From a metaphorical stand point, if Vietnam is our (America’s) sins, and Dafoe is our sacrifice, then Chris is the apostle writing the Gospel. My guess is, for Stone, Vietnam was so huge that it was a turning point for America, and as such, it required the writing of a new New Testament. Chris is literally writing epistles to his grandmother and asking her to share (spread the word) with his family. I would even go far as to suggest that Chris represents a specific Apostle: John. The Apostle John - who had a tendency to write in a more flowery, symbolic prose - is thought to be the youngest and often refers to himself as “the one Jesus loved.” This mirrors Chris as the newest grunt and the one Elias takes under his wing. Even more specifically, in his second epistle, John writes to an “elder lady” about the dangers of “false teachers.” John was also never martyred and is said to be the longest lived of the original twelve disciples. Which is happy news for Chris, but John also wrote Revelations and the end of the world. So I think we can extrapolate that Chris will lead a long life, but because of his experience in Vietnam, he can see the dangers that lie ahead.

That's cool. Cam and I were just talking about it and you chimed in. I have no problem if you - or anyone else - like' s Wizard more. I was just giving my rationale for my personal list. The only person's opinion that I'm interested in changing is Cam' s, but that's only because he fucked up our perfectly synchronized lists with his "free thinking." :)/>

Honestly, I think it leans toward outwardly simplistic. Don't get me wrong, "simple" doesn't necessarily mean "bad." Star Wars and Harry Potter are both "simple" stories. Simple stories tend to resonate. But I don't think it's as easy as "good vs evil" either. Barnes is a monster, yes, but without him, would they have survived as long as they did? They certainly weren't going to live very long under the lieutenant' s command. And I don't think I'd say Barnes is a Satan characters necessarily, but I think he - literally and figuratively - embodies the ugliness of war. At one point, Elias' group wonder if Barnes can even be killed. The truth is, Barnes - the man - can, but the ugliness he represents cannot. That's what war is. In order to survive the war, you have to be a little Barnes; in order to survive after the war, you have to be a little Elias.

I mean, don't you think you should watch it again before you say one movie is better than the other? I assure you, there aren't any mystical Indians to be found. That was first draft stuff. I'm not trying to say Wizard of Oz isn't impressive, but emotionally it leaves me cold. The story plods along. Character-wise it's pretty empty. There isn't any complexity. Dorothy' s just like, "Yep, I guess I'll go kill that witch because you told me to. I murdered her sister with my house so I guess she has it coming. Whatever I do, I won't think for myself. After all, I gotta get home to my dirt farm so I can be with my family that hates me and have my dog put down..." Granted, it's a kids' movie, but is that really an excuse? Wall-E is a kids' movie, and I'd argue it has more of an emotional core, and on a technical level, is almost as impressive. Ultimately, in my opinion, outside of its obvious technical achievements, Wizard of Oz is a pleasant yarn, with a few good songs. And it's not like I'm saying Wizard is complete crap. It's still above the majority of my list. And, look, I'm not saying Platoon' s in my Top Ten. Nor am I suggesting that it's not simplistic in its own way. But at least both sides are given a perspective. Both sides have an argument. And I'll take that over silly looking trees throwing apples at farm girls and Lollipop Guilds any day. (As for the music, I'm not really sure how to argue that...I really like Smokey Robinson, though.)

I respectfully disagree. You can like Wizard of Oz more, and it’s certainly more influential, but from a storytelling perspective, Platoon is the better movie. (I’m not even an Oliver Stone fan)

This is a great point. You really get a sense of it when King (Keith David) is leaving. Chris is like, "Hey, you should come over to my house and hang," but you get the feeling that's never going to happen. I think that's why Elias talks about loving being there, and why King (Elias' surrogate) gives such a wistful look before he hops on the chopper. Is ugly as it was, there was freedom there. Bunny even talks about it when he says, "I like it here. You get to do what you want. Nobody fucks with you. The only worry you got is dying. And if that happens, you won't know about it anyway. So what the fuck, man." Of course, Bunny is perverting that freedom, but still... I also think it's a fitting irony that Bunny says that if you die "you won't know about it anyway," but the soldier who kills him stands over him and takes slow and careful aim. We are even given Bunny's POV. Clearly, when Bunny died, he "knew about it."

I'll pour the coffee...

Goddamn that one was good...

I’m so glad that Chris didn’t let Barnes live at the end. That scene is so important and would have undercut the entire movie if he had caved to schmaltzy sentimentality. That scene is brilliant because it mirrors the earlier scene where Barnes shoots Elias. It’s set up as though Chris is avenging Elias when in actuality he’s becoming Barnes. And, by proxy, so is the audience.

I agree. I loved the movie, but it essentially opens with Elias carrying his gun on his back like a crucifix. I mean, from that shot alone you know he’s doomed, never mind whatever foreshadowing they discussed in the episode. In a way, that’s why I take a bit of exception with Kael’s take on Dafoe’s character. If she’s saying supposed to represent this “perfect man” that’s glossing over the fact that he’s essentially Jesus. He’s supposed to be better than everyone else. He even dies for the sins of his Platoon. Hell, even his name is Biblical. (Elias = Elijah a prophet taken to Heaven in a whirlwind of fire) Elias represents an ideal, but not necessarily one that Stone is suggesting is achievable. We can’t be Elias any more than we can walk on water. Ultimately, like you said, Chris wraps it up in the end. When people talk about Vietnam, it's often framed as reality (Barnes) vs. idealism (Elias). But for Stone, it's not about one or the other. It's about both. In which case, I would argue that Chris, being a child “born of those two fathers,” is the “perfect” man. He’s the balance.

Who's the third Cameron? Why are we bringing on a third partner? Is that motherfucker, Cameron, thinking of replacing me?

Man, I had some HILARIOUS insect word play all lined up ...and then Earwolf had to go and fix their forums. Now how am I going to work involuntary Mantis-slaughter into a conversation?

“Paying too much for your bug attorney? You’ll appreciate Cameron and Cameron’s locusts”

Goddamn it, Cam! You liked the Wizard of Oz *that* much? Everything is ruined forever!!!

Of course! We'll be hiring only the best! The ideal candidate will be an entomological expert with a stable job history in the field of in arthropod and insect forensics. They should be weird and a little nerdy, but in a quirky sort of way that's endearing. The kind of person you're not too sure about at first, but kind of grows on you after a couple of seasons over time. They'll check lividity, perform toxicology reports, and be an expert on all the major shoe treads. "Cameron and Cameron Attorneys at Law: We'll Bee on your side!"