Cameron H.

In Tiretown, the Solarbabies are exposed to the seedier side of living in a water scarce, dystopian society. As they walk through the town, Tug and Rabbit are solicited by a prostitute who says, "Hey, Big Chunk! Two quarts and you could spend a few hours." Of course, Tug, being the loveable naif that he is, questions her, "A few hours for what?" before being ushered away by Rabbit. Now, Tug's question is endearing, but I have a couple of questions of my own that I think are far more practical. First of all, if water is so scarce, who the hell is bartering the chance of a horrible death from water deprivation for sex with a prostitute when the Tchigani have all the free love you could want over in their crazy amusement park village? And secondly, "a few hours?" The seems pretty excessive, especially for someone suffering from chronic dehydration. Do you think those "hours" have to be consecutive or is it kind of like a Gift Card that you can redeem as often as you want until it runs out?

Does anyone else feel like putting headlights on rollerskates would be wildly impractical? if you just think of the mechanics of skating, there's no way you'd be able to get a steady enough beam to help you in the slightest. You'd just have light streaming Helter Skelter in all directions. In fact, the only thing they would be good for is announcing your presence and position to any E-Cops who might be out searching for you. Then again, stealth doesn't exactly seem to be the Solarbabies forte. For example, when Jason catches up to Daniel, the first thing he says to him is, "Next time, leave a better trail..." Oh, really? Do you mean like the kind of trail that allowed you, the Solarbabies, and Darstar to be easily tracked through the desert time and time again? Daniel was on point and was never in danger of being caught until he teams up with Jason and the other Solarbaby lunkheads.

Just thought of another one: Paul's Best Intro Line: "Fluff the pillows" for Temptation. I like the intro line, but what I liked even more is that the mics were still on during the theme song. First, you hear June crack up. Then you hear Jason say, "That really got you, huh?" Then, throughout the rest of the theme song, you can hear everyone giggling hysterically. I said it at the time, but goddamn that was charming! ETA: Another one I just heard. Best New Word Created on the Podcast: Mini-episode 90.5 at 50 seconds in. "Frensual"--a sensual friendship. "It's, like, I'm grabbing your hand-ear and just squeezing it. I'm not saying I'm going to take this ear home tonight and defile it. I'm just saying, like, 'Hey, I like this ear. I'm gonna be in it for a couple more minutes...'"

Best Moment of Realization--Sharknado 2 when it's realized (by everyone but Scott) that the shark at the end of the movie has Tara Reid's hand and wedding ring in its mouth.

I've got a couple that I can think of off the top of my head. I'm still making my way through the qualifying episodes, so they may change. Maybe not though if they were my first instinct. Best Tangent--"Monkey Rights" Monkey Shines Best Recreation--Jason/Katie Aselton, Temptation (14:36), "Marriage Counseling Couple." I feel like there's a good one in the Safe Haven episode as well, but I can't remember it off the top of my head or if there even is one. Best Thing that June is Truly Upset By--It's a toss up between "Monkey Rights," "Be A Man," (starts around 23:20 and goes for about 5 mins...), and "He's So Little...", but since both Monkey Shines and Temptation are represented in my other choices, I think I'd go with "He's So Little..." from Island of Dr. Moreau. Best Guest Laugh--I haven't re-listened the episodes they're on yet, but I'm going to guess my nominees will most likely be Paul F. Tompkins and Pete Holmes. Best Second Opinion--Right now, I really like the first one on the Gooby episode that was basically, "Amazon delivered my order." I'm sure there are others. Best Abuse of Someone in the Audience--Jason's attack on the guys wearing shorts (I think this was TMNT 2) and the one where the woman fell asleep (I don't remember the episode, but it was relatively recent...) My biggest issue so far is just remembering the categories as I re-listen. I'm sure I'm missing things like "Best Metaphor..." Anyone have any tricks they're using to keep track of everything?

I have a couple of suggestions for possible categories: Best Moment of Host/Guest Outrage--I'm thinking specifically of PFT's reaction to finding out David E. Kelly writes his scripts longhand on yellow legal paper (Ep. 107 Lake Placid 22:19). Best "Go Fuck Yourselves if You're Not at the Live Show" moment--I know someone else already suggested this, but I can't remember where I read it. Basically moments like the "Staying Alive Dance Party" or "Audience Member Does a Split."

100% agree! This was my first episode, and I loved it! I'm looking forward to catching up with all the episodes I've missed. This was a real treat!

Just listened to it. Thanks, Taylor Anne, now I have a whole new podcast I have to subscribe to. It's like you think I have all the time in the world.

Yeah, I was thinking of broader categories (e.g. favorite episode, favorite guest, etc). That is assuming you even choose to go that route this time around... They would be like People's Choice Awards. You could call them the "Dummies" or something... I'll keep thinking, but I like a lot of the suggestions I've heard so far!

I wish there was something I could write to make you feel better, some magic phrase that could make your situation more bearable. Unfortunately, if those words exist, I don't know them. But please know, that during this difficult time, I am thinking of you and your family. I am so very sorry for your loss. We're here for you anytime.

I wasn't around for the first HOWDY'S but are the winners going to be voted upon by the listeners or by you, June and Jason? I think you guys "voted" on the fly last time? Based on The Canon's thread, I can't imagine it would be too difficult to set up a poll on the forums for each category--hiding the results until revealed in the actual episode. However, trying to include every listener--across all platforms (i.e. Facebook, Twitter, Forums)--may be difficult. Maybe set it up here (I'm biased) and just direct people to the forums in the weeks leading up to the episode(s) once the categories are set. Hopefully, I can come up with some other way to help too! I love the show, but I am aggressively untalented.

Considering every single negative thing I've read about this episode was written by men, I think there's definitely an argument to be made that "men are dicks." Personally, I don't subscribe to that kind of black and white reasoning, but I may be biased. All I know is if a lesbian comedian ever makes a joke that threatens the importance of my penis--and therefore (apparently) the sole measure of my own self-worth--ever again, I will not rest until I've signed up to every forum on Earth to proclaim vehemently that that's simply not true. .

That's a pretty funny joke, Taylor Anne! With that being said, let me tell you how you could make it better...

I think it's worth three bucks. I enjoyed myself quite a bit, actually. I'm not saying it's great or anything, but compared to some of the movies they do that feel like a chore to sit through, this one's pretty entertaining, and at only 90 mins, not too arduous of a task. If nothing else, it will give you an hour and a half to marvel at Jason Patric's flawless skin without feeling too pervy...

I meant to respond to this earlier, but YES! I'm extremely excited for the 2nd "Annual" Howdys--and I wholly support your use of quotation marks around "Annual." I guess we get one every time June and Paul have a kid... Anyway, I've been wanting this for some time. I wish there was something I could do to help, but I'm not really sure how. I've never created a "super cut," and even if I were to learn how, I'm sure there are others better suited to the task than myself. Does anyone have any good categories?

And...?

Hey, Mongoose6, welcome to the boards! As for your question, I would say, personally, that I'm not really concerned about Spoilers, but I do feel like talking too much about the movie before the episode can sometimes backfire. A recent example of this was The Covenant episode. By the time the episode actually dropped, it had been talked out and we were all kind of done with it. For myself, if I'm going to comment on the upcoming movie in the mini-sode thread at all, I try to keep it to general impressions of the movie (e.g. did I like it or not) and save my specifics for the Main Episode. But that's just me, there's no hard and fast rule. In short, feel free to talk about whatever you want, whenever you want; and if it's a Spoiler, you can wrap it in tags as Dan suggested. However, don't be too discouraged if people don't respond to your post. It may just be that the people around here aren't ready to get into the movie yet. Most of the time, mini-sode threads are just a place where we talk nonsense at each other and have a good time. Oftentimes, I prefer them to the main episode threads. But like I said, other than "Don't be an Assface," there really aren't any rules.

I hate to be "that guy," but I do have a little constructive criticism for people calling into the ASK PAUL line. If you're going to call in with a question, explanation hope, or whatever, please consider writing out what you're going to say before calling in. It doesn't have to be anything too rehearsed, just some bullet points to keep your mind on track. I am enjoying the new bit, and I like what people have been bringing to the table, but I think it could be improved by excising some of the "ummms," "ahhhhs," and "uhhhhs." Also, if you're going to call in, don't be afraid of sounding stupid. Be confident, don't try too hard to be funny, and speak clearly into the receiver. Criticism over. Hope I wasn't too harsh.

I can only assume this was Jason's reaction when Emily Gilmore showed up in Solarbabies.

In honor of Solarbabies! A little Smokey Robinson...

I'm back. Yeah, that would have been cool, but I imagine he wanted to avoid voicing his stance publicly. Maybe he'll comment to the thread directly... If we simply ignore the issue, are we not complicit in any violence that may result?

I WON!!!! Oh, Yeah! Ever since they introduced that new C&O winning theme, I've been jonesing for it! And now, having fulfilled all of my Earthly desires, I must bid you all a very fond, adieu.

Me: "Man, that was a long and tough day, but finally, I can relax and get back to writing. What's this? The mini episode just dropped. Well fuck. Sorry future Oscar for Best Original Screenplay, you'll just have to wait a little bit longer..."

Now y'all got me nostalgic and I've dug up my old band's demos. Oh, those were some salad days... We were adorably and endearingly terrible. Vocal aids (at the time): Half pack of cigarettes and soda. Surprisingly, it didn't help...but I did look cool

Oh, fuck! Now I do too!