Episode 74 — Kumail Nanjiani, Our Close Friend

[Game of Scones 5812]

its not our quanity its our quality

 

pics of animals

broken sentences

overused copying of lines from the pod

gifs

jpegs

cult mentality

 

PUNS!

[SteveH 11126]

Don't forget:

 

Recipes

Mental health counseling

Half-assed feuds

Original songs that sound like Moondance

Music recommendations

Points

Children's artwork

 

And so much more

[SteveH 11126]

Hey kittens - it's about lunch time in the UK. Anything we need to know?

[kittens 1288]

i'm at the train station - i just had a long baguette named 'the italian' which included mozzarella, tomato and pesto (much like a pizza)

it tasted good

i am on the way to a meal with my mother, not sure what kind of restaurant we are going to, but i have my fingers crossed! (for an italian restaurant)

will keep you all posted

[SteveH 11126]

Go ahead and call me a regular poindexter, but I've been 'running some numbers'

and I think we have objectively the best subforum on here!

We average 116.6 posts per thread, blowing every other subforum out of the water!

 

Improv 4 Humans comes in second with a whopping 21.4 posts per thread!

 

Keep up the good work!

 

Sean and Hayes-

 

You can bring that metric with you to your next meeting with Scott Anchorman and that new guy. Tell them to stick that 116.6 in their [redacted] and smoke it.

[kittens 1288]

apple and cheese tart

bad

pissed off

[dixon 5920]

What meal was that for, kittens?

[A Bear 1813]

apple and cheese tart

bad

pissed off

 

Well now I'm pissed off.

[Joe McGurl 8358]

I was gone for a day and madness has ensued.

[kittens 1288]

What meal was that for, kittens?

 

another lunch i guess

 

[kittens 1288]

i'm having too many meals today i can't help myself

[SteveH 11126]

 

Sean and Hayes-

 

You can bring that metric with you to your next meeting with Scott Anchorman and that new guy. Tell them to stick that 116.6 in their [redacted] and smoke it.

 

This is a big deal. I didn't do the fancy maths that Chefszki did, but here are some more numbers:

 

We're closing in on 700 replies

 

Second place for most replies in an Earwolf subform (other than HH), is CBB- NOT farts and pro 4 with 362.

 

Third is the " what guests would you like to see?" Sub forum on CBB that was started in 2011 (at least 5 of those were me saying Sean and Hayes).

 

Then there's our friend The Wolf Den. Most replies: 31 in a subforum also started in 2011. That's .02 posts per day

 

[Zsinjeh 1677]

I've been entertaining guests all weekend, I've missed a lot of exciting developments!

[Zsinjeh 1677]

While out and about in downtown Stockholm showing it to friends who live in flyover Sweden states I picked up these snazzy coasters and I ate a really sloppy pizza and had a lot of coffee

[JMonsterface 1974]

*I like to imagine in my mind someone seeing how high the number of replies is and is assuming maybe Kumail got in a Maron-style fight with Sean and Hayes, so they listen to the episode hoping to hear some juicy controversy, but then there isn't any and it's just a funny great episode. So at this point, they're thinkin, "Hey, what the heck!?", and probably scratching their heads, but also starting to loff a little bit at how weird and messed up the whole situation is. So then they go check out the forums thinking that everybody must have got upset and be arguing about something, and they're reading it and it's just nice cool funny people being calm and getting along, and this is really starting to freak their beans, but also is bussing their whole sh*t up, so much so that it's maybe even scaring them a little and they're starting to feel the need to read every post, and then by the time they they've done that they probably got so messed up in the head by reading all of that that now they're joining in and they're one of us now!

 

*There are two animals and a toaster in the background of this story.

[rod aug 5637]

So my mom and I went out to get an ice cream cake for my birthday because they are the best cake. The guy wrote Happy Brithday so he gave me this cake for free and made me another. Luckily my Jewish friend with a lisp just had a kid so this extra cake should be good for the ceremony.

 

First draft help me rewrite pls

[chanson 9697]

What up, forums?

[NoahTomaszewski 2768]

What up, forums?

 

Nothin' much

[JMonsterface 1974]

So my supermodel exgirlfriend (yes we still hang out, shes best friends with my current supermodel girlfriend) and I went out to get 700 ice cream cakes for my birthday because they are the best cake. The guy wrote Happy Brithday You Are My Hero and he gave me this cake for free and made me another and another until he got to 700. All of the cakes were free because I saved him from a fire last week. Luckily my Robot friend with a missile launcher arm just had a fight with godzilla so this extra cake should be good for choking godzilla.

 

second draft possibly perfect

 

I did some punch up for you.

[kittens 1288]

dinner's coming soon if anyone's interested

[JMonsterface 1974]

dinner's coming soon if anyone's interested

Is that the same thing as "high tea"? Either way, I am interested.

[kobthatreal 5896]

Going to see paddington today. Wish me luck. Might OD on cuteness.

[rod aug 5637]

 

I did some punch up for you.

my first and only set will be all cake jokes, this one's up there with the best (mine).

[kittens 1288]

it was hot sloppy cheesy and italian but get this - it wasn't pizza, get this - it was pasta, get this - i loved it

 

i didn't have any pizzas today but you can't have any pizzas every day can you

 

sorry if today's reviews seem a little lacklustre, none of my meals have really excited me as much as last night's did. i thought i could branch out into talking about all kinds of food but i was kidding myself i'm a pizza guy through and through

thanks for listening

[gototimsvlogdotnet 2886]

Kittens I was actually in Bristol for a day back in August. I saw St Vincent at the O2 theater. It was cool. I stayed at the Holiday Inn. I have a distinct memory of listening to Project Funway the next morning as I was walking to the train station and getting on the train.

 

Any chance we met?

 

Also, seven hundo, although I don't consider this thread eligible for the record books.