ABRAXAS

I think he's saying you make him all flustered and he likes to stare at your mouth.

Probably heard some of his songs

The Los Angeles Clippers Nicole Kidman: I'm a witch Will Ferrell: I'm a Clippers fan!

IAmA newer member to the Hollywood Handbook forums. AMA!! (please upvote, let's try to get this to page one)

The independent film Bum Fights did a pretty good job of raising social awareness in my opinion. Like, Jerry Lewis telethons are such bullshit I just want something real.

For real, though, I just want to point out how annoying the concept of the internet being a positive force for social change and freedom of speech is to me. The Internet, much like those who provide its content, is essentially worthless.

Reddit can be so funny, but it's just too esoteric, ya know? Like, I'm always loving these Advice Animals, but I don't think the common person really gets it. Unfortunately, I just have to rofl at imgur cause I don't have enough space on my computer to download Tor, so I can't get to Reddit proper.

The reddit community is soooooo funny. I especially love the Music subreddit. They got this one band on there Radiohead. They're like the bestest band. It's cool, though, cause they also play more obscure bands, like The Pixies.

You know, like lesser people...

Do you people have Last.fm or Tumblr accounts or something like that? I'm curious about the other personality traits of this forum.

Everyone feel free to add me on Facebook, too. Just type in "Mark Zuckerburg". I should be the first result.

This reminds me of this one time when I was really depressed and miserable and I got a call from Sallie Mae (a call I had been avoiding). I answered and we set up a payment deferment for six months. At the end of the conversation I told her how unhappy I was and thanked her for being nice to me and started crying. She was like "Uhhh... well..... have a nice day!"

(p.s. this was on the radio last night and it made me so happy)

I just learned that King of Queens is on TVLAND. When I was younger it was just Gilligan's Island. SO MUCH TIME HAS PASSED. WE WILL ALL DIE ONE DAY.

Guys, I've never seen Deadwood so could we talk about something a little more inclusive? You're all being very abelist right now.

Remember when Marc Maron went to the Creation Museum? That guy is SOOO edgy!

Today is the sixth day of my account existing, and I gotta say, this place has sure changed. Remember when things were simple? Nowadays it seems simplicity and common curtesy have gone the way of the buffalo. On my second day I remember feeling so loved as I opened the gift basket you were all so kind to send me (the kind with a teddy bear inside of a balloon. My favorite! I mean, how do they do that?!). Now, on day six: nothing. I feel like God on the last day of creation, just knowing that soon enough you're all gonna eat my fruit even though I told you time and time again that I'm saving it for later and it's really gonna piss me off when I see it isn't there. Don't even give me that "the snake tricked me" bullshit, like, who gets outwitted by a reptile? Get your shit together.

I'm gonna listen to the "Listeners" episodes again to get a better sense of people here now that I'm posting. Also, I'm drunk and so so so sorry for making some posts that weren't that great. I'm a bad person.

The bread is spiraling out of a roll.

No, I'm the nice one here, Chocolate & Cheese. (It's funny because I said I was nice and then said something Ween)

What in the fuck is a "Colonel Sanders Socialist" anyway?

I work Friday's through Monday's (unless I have overtime on Tuesday) so my weekend starts now. Party at my house, y'all. Everyone's invited. Bring chips.

You should probably start at the beginning (a very good place to start, our friend Julie Andrews tells us). HOWEVER (and this is imperative), you should then skip ahead five episodes, then back four episodes, then forward ahead 16 episodes, then listen to all prime numbered episodes, then hit all your double digit episodes. At this point, you're going to want to take a break for a while and think things over. Head to the nearest body of water and skip stones. Think back on old love interests. Take a deep breath, then look at your own reflection in the water. Say "This is who I love now, and that's all I need". Head back home and pull the turkey out of the oven that you had been preparing. Feel free to throw it away; you won't need it for the next step. Compile a playlist of any Reality Show Show episodes that remain unplayed at this point. Listen to them in chronical order in five minute spurts between crying episodes.

I know I'm new, but everyone feel free to bust out the old Rolodex, erase your grandpa's number and add: ABRAXAS: Sweetheart of the Rodeo Memorial Orchestra and Tra-La-La Band References!