LARDdischarge

I'm lonely at night and that is my plight.

I ask a question regarding digestion; my gut said "what" and then fell out my butt.

You can slide down a slide, but you can't fist a fist.

Remember, Remember, the smell of my member, that funk chowder season and rot. I can think of no reason why that funk chowder season should ever be begot.

Simplicity is the throbbing metropolis of the great king Simpli.

Bright is the night when it's light out and also day time.

Kick back and pick ac-ne.

Tender is the loin.

Given enough time, a room filled with chimpanzees will write the complete works of Shakespeare. Unless, of course, one of those monkeys has a venereal disease, in which case, they won't last long.

Swamp rhymes with damp. Damp swamp. Say it again. My swamp is damp.

I can't seem to tell this hole in the ground from my ass. The question is, do I need to know the difference?

Butter the rolls to summon the trolls.

There are a lot of fish in the sea. At least until climate changes kills them off, am'i right fellas?

Eustace County is 100% of its 2,000 freakin' population's citizens total imbeciles living in mommy's basement, you heard it here, in the Franklin County Herald.

When you're in the bathroom, European. When you're in the yard, Eustace County sux, go Franklin County. .

There's a special place in Hell for Satan. It's called his office.

Can you call a bug fat?

Bread is God's dingleberries.

There's a train of gravy for the next lucky lady.

The Mummy, more like the BUMMY, I'm saying that the Mummy is a BURDEN ON SOCIETY.

Dr. Jekyl, more like Dr. JERKyl. I'm saying he's a SNOB.

My mother's so tipsy, she got an IUD. Wait, I meant DUI. Hm, those acronyms are shockingly similar.

My momma's so skinny, frankly, we're worried about her!

It's a hard life for a limp turd like me.

Lend me your stuff, and I'll give it a fluff. Lend me your junk, and I'll clean off the gunk.