SideofMcG

Sitting in the tub. Blub blub blub. Sitting on the couch-o. Groucho groucho groucho.

Who's Afraid of Virginia's Wolves? Well Melvin's Pigs for a start. Poor oinkers never stood a chance. Divorce is hard on a farm.

When life gives you decks make decades. Which takes fucking ages man. Like ten years or sumpin'.

I like big boots and I cannot lie. You other brothers wear size nines.

Fuck those fevers. Starve 'em. Starve 'em all. Or at least that's what my grandmother always said.

I've only watched about half of the movie but here's a few things I want to address... "Feed a fever, starve a cold." That's the wrong way around. It's "feed a cold, starve a fever." Now was this lazy writing or did Nam-Vet Priest deliberately get it the wrong way around because he somehow intuited that Fr. Doug was now part dinosaur? Because dinosaurs were cold blooded and their metabolism works in almost the opposite way to ours. So by switching around the adage was Nam-Vet Priest letting slip that he knew Fr. Doug is part reptile or was it caused by the PTSD he no doubt suffered after his special lady was liquidised all over his face in Nam? "Dinosaurs never existed and even if they did I don't transform into one!" Besides being an amazing line of dialogue this kinda implies that Catholics don't believe in dinosaurs which we all know isn't true. A mistranslation in the Bible leads many people to think that Jesus had a problem with Tax Collectors whereas the truth is he had issue with T-Rex Collectors - the big game hunters of their day. The Confessional When Fr. Doug kills the pimp in confession those are the roomiest confessionals ever. There's a standing lamp behind the pimp! I'm only used to the confessionals I know from Ireland and maybe everything is bigger in America but standing lamps seems a bit excessive even for you guys. Other quick things: in Nam did many US soldiers wear jeans and carry shotguns? The drinking from chalices was great. If Nam-Vet Priest tried his hand at the clergy AGAIN after coming home then it meant he was already in a seminary (or Priest College as it's properly called), left, met a girl, went to thoroughly convincing Vietnam and then after his sweetheart phase changed all over him decided to go back home and give being a priest another go. Finally the priest outfits are the shoddiest pieces of shit ever. Look at that collar - it's like someone stitched it while wearing the Dinosaur costume!

It's Star Trek Weaveathon time! Set your phasers to spun.

We used to pass around joints, now we pass around babies.

Misery Spoon Spoon is cancelled. Welcome to Comedy Bang Bang

A T-Rex with an ass like that is gonna be a DinoSORE when I'd done with it.

Celebrity Chefs and Celebratory Chefs can sell a brats toy cake to me any day of the week.

It's great. I was at the premiere of it at the Galway Film Fleadh last year and everyone attending got "a gravel" to take home with them.

There's nothing like a good metaphor my Papa alway said and then would beat us when we pointed out that was a simile.

Quoth the Raven, use code POE at checkout for 10% off.

Literary assholes are not literally assholes but you're dealing with the same level of shit so who gives a Tolstoy's?

Disembowelment is when you mock Martin Bowelment

Saucy Nuggs for my real friends. Real Time With Bill Maher for my sauce friends.

Opinions are like assholes. I don't want to hear yours.

Are you talking Look Who's Talking to the guy who was Lucas stalking? And will you accept a reverse charge call from the State Pen?

Revenge is a dish best served with Cole Porter

As a comedian the accusations of plagiarism against me mean I don't get no respect, no respect at all.

My cat Jod loves seeing me in my horse-riding outfit. When he does, Jod purrs.

I've been down so long it looks like duck to me.

Blame me, shame me but don't skin and frame me.

Toilet humour will make you friends, thru the camaraderie of the U-bend.