SideofMcG

Oysters in the cloisters, prawns on the lawns - I'm allergic to this whole monastery.

Joyce's voice choices were foisted on oysters. Very shellfish of her.

It's a Memphis Kansas Breeze song in reverse! https://twitter.com/twlldun/status/1301806534687690752/photo/1

It's cold and flu season and you know what that means. Giraffes are bulk buying throat lozenges again.

Stand in the place where you are. (Now face west) Put your hands where I can see 'em (you are under arrest)

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, three times a lady, shame on the Commodores.

Delivery Driver, nip to the toilet for thirty seconds and miss thyself.

Turn that clown upside down. Shake his pockets. Motherfucker owes me three hundred dollars.

Four Weedings and a Funnel Cake.

My favourite song is "The Bees Are Back in Town" by Sting Lizzy

Give a man enough rope and he'll hang himself, teach a man to manufacture rope and he'll open a Rope Emporium, make millions and then buy a really expensive rope to hang himself with.

I'm Batman, welcome to my Batman Cave.

Boiled Pig Trotters or Harlem Globetrotters? It's a slam dunk either way.

A Byrd in the hand is worth two everything turn! turn! turn!

The vagabond didn't get the job in the Nike store because beggars can't be shoesers.

To catch a phrase one must first think like a phrase. To think like a phrase one must of course study a phrase. And to study a phrase one must of course catch a phrase. Or 22 of them preferably.

It ain't what you chew, it's the way that you chew it. Loudly. You chew really loudly. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD GO INTO THE OTHER ROOM WITH YOUR FUCKING SANDWICH.

Row row row your boat, columns are for the weak. Merrily merrily merrily merrily sideways only - up and down is the word of satan.

Horton Hears A Who's On First

If you have a catchphrase submission, write it on a piece of paper and shove it up your hoop.

I'm a joker, I'm a toker, I'm a co-worker's leg stroker. I'm looking for a new job.

Penne for your thoughts. Ravioli for your emotions. Spaghetti for your libido. This joke has run out of steam quickly. Mama Mia!

Prophylactic? Afraid not. I'm strictly amateur, just in it for the love of the phylactic.

I've never watched a Transformers movie. Is this the one Andy Daly is in? I'm too lazy to google.

A sniggering Barry Gibbs is triggering the libs. He messed with my fountain pens by jiggering the nibs.