WhalePrintPants
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Everything posted by WhalePrintPants
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Where my bitches at? Serious question, the mailman left the gate open and my dogs got out
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Hi Earwolf person... -
What's up, deep-fried hot dog, how's the state fair?
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Welcome to WTF with Marc Maron, this is your guest host Scott Aukerman, are we good?
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I only answer to my Creator and by Creator I mean my father's penis
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You call it throwing rocks at squirrels and small dogs, I call it acoustic Pokemon
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Something smells fishy and you've taken a suspiciously long time between showers
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The world is but an off-brand simulation game bought by a cheap alien who sucks at playing it.
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Comedy Bang Bang on the fang fang oh forget it I'll never make it as a vampire rapper
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Pardon me for prying, but I just really need to get this window open
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I hope the intern Aukerman gets to go through these things at least smiled a bit at this one. -
No no no NOT a Trump pump, I said I need 'a sump pump'
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Jesus loves you and so does his partner Raul and they'd like to know your grindr username
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Jesus H Christ and the H stands for Howie
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I'm breast feeding now, anybody know where I can get a good deal on bulk Purina breast chow?
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Sometimes when you stare into the abyss, the abyss stares back at you and wonders what's your deal is, buddy.
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Who you callin' a cracker, cheeseball?
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What's up, frog...oh, you're a salamander? Sorry, but I don't see species, all amphibians are equal in my eyes
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What's up, frog...oh, you say you're a salamander? Sorry, but I don't see species, all amphibians are equal in my eyes. -
Gonna run this through the lab and see what happens; c'mon boy, here's another blood sample, yum yum good dog!
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What is the sound of one hand clapping, asked the deaf amputee
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Paul F. Tompkins, one-man haberdashery
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Curiosity killed the cat so please stay the hell out of my sock drawer
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Curiosity killed the cat so please stay the hell out of my sock drawer -
Don't know why that heroin addict got so mad at my joke, I was just needling him a little...
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