Football Meatlong
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Posts posted by Football Meatlong
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Please, Hey Asshole is my father. Call me Hey Asshole, Jr.
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Its actually pronounced Vinnie "Vice City" Van Gogh.
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We could all learn a thing or two from Scrooge and have brass door knockers crafted in the likeness of dead business associates.
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First they're up, then they're down. Elevators are a lot like things that go up and down.
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My storied career and extensive body of research around the topic of hot tub time machines suggests a strong correlation between time travel and contraction of sexually transmitted diseases.
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While we study moon phases, the teacher scowls, the whole class gazes, as teen wolf howls.
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Hi, I'm Bob Dylan, and I'm here to talk to you about how to keep moss off your bowling balls.
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The sick kickflip passed peacefully in it's sleep in the early morning of February 16th.
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It's like my grandfather Bozo always said, "Desperate mimes call for desperate gestures."
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I'm not a stupid fucker, I'm a stupid fucker's son. I'm only fucking stupid cuz the fucker met me mum.
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Oh, THESE smiling eyes? Well, let's just say they're a mirror for the sun, buddy.
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You can imagine my disappointment upon discovering that my newly acquired hot tub time machine was actually just a jetted bathtub time machine.
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As Papa John Misty once said, "Better acoustics, better pizza"
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"Just the tip", explained the professor of restaurant economics.
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Beauty is in the eye of the bee holder, but what should I do with all these bee keeper's eyes?
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I've heard of me so horny, but miso soup?
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Congratulations to the new winner of Robot Jeopardy. The answer was indeed "What is love".
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Franklin, my dear, I don't Delano Roosevelt.
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One for the money, two for the show, come on everybody let's start thinking about heading home, it's getting pretty late.
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If you're wondering whether I like to live life on the edge, let's just say my preferred variety of Chex Mix is "Bold"
Saint Patrick drove all the snakes from Ireland, and it took a while because he had a Fiat.
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Saint Patrick drove all the snakes from Ireland, and it took a while because he had a Fiat.