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Juicy Jesse the Juiceman Jesse

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About Juicy Jesse the Juiceman Jesse

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  1. Once upon a time, there was a host of a podcast that didn't understand that he isn't allowed at Burger King anymore. The End.
  2. If you want to tell me how you feel, don't bother, I already know! It's with your hands!
  3. The crow caws at dawn to tell me to mow the lawn, and he asks me to call him Shawn. I oblige.
  4. Sometimes when I look up at the stars, I wonder if there is an alien up there dreaming about making sweet love to me.
  5. Easy there pal, I will not lick your paper cut wounds, not until I've had my coffee.
  6. These boots were made for walking, and they are on sale for 59.99, only at Rural King!
  7. Dinner is ready, we're having rancid calamari again! Sorry Charlie!
  8. If I make love to an Aardvark in a forest with no one around, does the Aardvark make a sound?
  9. Hello and welcome to Comedy Bible Belt, the podcast where we make fun of the Bible
  10. Please don't eat all the french onion dip, it's all I've got until pay day.
  11. Oh no, look what the cat dragged in...It's me Scott Aukerman the Host of WTF with Marc Maron
  12. For the last time Debbie...I am not the Dali Lama!
  13. A long long time ago in an Office Depot far away, a man weeps in the bathroom. His life is in shambles.
  14. Just because I am covered head to toe in horse semen, doesn't mean the horse is my lover.
  15. Believe me when I say I'm the world's biggest liar