BloatedFartingScumBag

Fill my eyes with that blurry vision, no disguise for macular degeneration

If you'll bear twelve sons of mine, my mom can watch 'em when we go out. I can call you Aisha, and Aisha when you call me, call me Ishmael.

When you're asked to provide two examples of brief utterances: that's "um" or "eh".

Eat shit, muchachos! I'm the holy ravioli with the gilt-edged guarantee!

I've been tasked to perform oral on canines in the arctic. Just out here suckin' on chilly dogs.

"Give me lib-titties or neocon nips."

My followers have left me no choice so, without time to spare, I'm officially launching my asshole directly into the sun!

Get that genie's peenie-weenie out my lemon drop martini

Alpha-dogs for my a-holes and beta-blockers for my b-holes

Wakey-wakey, Kevin Bakey. Rise and shine! It's Larry Fine!

Ashes to ashes, tip to taint, show me where to spray that paint!

Yep

As a family subsisting solely off feces, we live by the following: 'Eat Shit or Die!'

If you can't stand the feet, get out of the fetish forums.

Two if by Pink, One if by Stink: That's What I Scream Every Time That I Blink

Yabba Dabba Don't.

"Goosey Lucy, Good-and-Juicy". That's what those puerile prisoners used to call me in baby jail.

I'm a total bozo when it comes to rhetoric and Early Modern English, which begs the question: "Wherefore art thou, Romeo? I can't find thee!"

Time to bool out with your tool out, and queef out with your beef out!

Give a man a kiss, he's yours for the day. Teach a man to kiss, well that just sounds like my mom's relationship with her 33 year-old son, me!

I don't know I'm

In this world only two things are certain: the life AND times of Tim.

Come hence, common MENSA men! Commerce commends cum hens!

I'm very intolerant of the dairy-intolerant. Just feed me my lactose or I'll make it so you lack toes!

I smoke up some Cheeba then head to Amoeba and listen to my country music crush, Reba.