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Euripides’ Shorts

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Everything posted by Euripides’ Shorts

  1. Euripides’ Shorts
    In the trendy version of The Cask of Amontillado, the bricks are all exposed.
  2. Euripides’ Shorts
    Do squats count as butt stuff? Asking for a friend.
  3. Euripides’ Shorts
    I tried a glory hole for the first time and burned my dick off. Frankly I don’t see what all the fuss is about.
  4. Euripides’ Shorts
    https://www.reddit.com/r/todayilearned/comments/4mfoet/til_the_term_glory_hole_originated_in_glass/
  5. Euripides’ Shorts
    Spray before you go, but never go to a donkey show.
  6. Euripides’ Shorts
    And the Heynong shall become the Hey-o, and the Hey-o the Heynong.
  7. Euripides’ Shorts
    If this relationship is going to work, I need uninterrupted time to twerk.
  8. Euripides’ Shorts
    Fat-bottomed geodes, you make the rock collecting world go round.
  9. Euripides’ Shorts

    I came, I saw, I pissed my pants.

    Euripides’ Shorts posted a topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    I came, I saw, I pissed my pants.
  10. Euripides’ Shorts
    Some people use the TV as a babysitter, but I just use it to watch babysitter porn.
  11. Euripides’ Shorts

    Poop dipe, wipe-wipe, swipe right.

    Euripides’ Shorts posted a topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    Poop dipe, wipe-wipe, swipe right.
  12. Euripides’ Shorts
    You were right: raising this baby is way harder than pulling out!
  13. Euripides’ Shorts
    Okay, I’ll say it: John Lennon’s voice leaves much to be desired.
  14. Euripides’ Shorts
    When you offered to tell me about your sex life “from soup to nuts,” I thought you meant something else.
  15. Euripides’ Shorts
    Whoever said poop is all fun and games never had anal fissures.
  16. Euripides’ Shorts
    Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, “Be sure to titrate those monkeys over ten days.”
  17. Euripides’ Shorts
    I can give you a ride to the donkey show but you have to bring your own ping pong balls.
  18. Euripides’ Shorts
    If you think pulling out is inconvenient, just wait ‘til you have a baby.
  19. Euripides’ Shorts

    My name is Oedipus and I want my mommy.

    Euripides’ Shorts posted a topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    My name is Oedipus and I want my mommy.
  20. Euripides’ Shorts
    I have no interest in boobies, blue-footed or otherwise.
  21. Euripides’ Shorts

    Time is money; poop is funny.

    Euripides’ Shorts posted a topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    Time is money; poop is funny.
  22. Euripides’ Shorts
    If you can’t take the poop jokes, get out of the airwaves.
  23. Euripides’ Shorts

    It’s time for catchphrase submitters to unionize.

    Euripides’ Shorts replied to TootyBut2DButt's topic in New Catchphrase Suggestions

    Seconded.
  24. Euripides’ Shorts
    Whoever named blueberries really phoned it in.
  25. Euripides’ Shorts
    Baby, are you a porpoise? Because you got a killer blowhole.
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