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Content count
1625 -
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Days Won
29
Posts posted by Euripides’ Shorts
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She plugged my butt but she opened my soul.
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Call it “Urine-Us” or call it “Your-Anus;” there’s no way out of THIS astrological potty joke.
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Netflix and chill; Roku and butt stuff.
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Pop the top and roll the windows down; I just farted.
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All around the living room rug, the father chased the baby. The father thought ‘twas all in fun… Ralph! goes the baby.
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Believe me, I am drunker than I let on.
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When you said you love Balzac, I thought you meant something else.
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I wasn’t born in a barn, but I was conceived in one.
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I feel like donkey butt, and not in a good way.
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I didn’t MAKE anything. I just dispensed it.
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Then I’ll huff, and I’ll puff, and I hope you shaved down there.
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Not by the hair of my jinny-jin-genitals!
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When you said we were going to take a look under the hood, I thought you meant something else.
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If you ain’t embossed or spot-glossed, you can get lost.
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Oh, so all of a sudden it doesn’t count as wearing pants if they’re around my ankles?
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That’s not the sound of one hand clapping; I’m just masturbating.
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Pump yourself before you bump yourself.
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Be he alive or be he dead, I’ll grind on his boner and give him head.
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“Have you ever eaten here before? Let me explain how our menu works…”
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I may be handsome, but that doesn’t mean I know what I’m doing.
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Waiter…I ordered the cat food and this is filet mignon.
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The front door’s free, but the back door will cost you a fancy dinner.
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Yesterday is a JPG. Tomorrow’s a PNG. Today is a GIF…so please send nudes.
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I think I recognize this passage. Is it excerpted from Peter, Peter, Siren Skeeter?
When I deuce / The sluice / Is twice as loose / If I’ve had juice.
in New Catchphrase Suggestions
Posted
When I deuce
The sluice
Is twice as loose
If I’ve had juice.