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El Chico Malo

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Everything posted by El Chico Malo

  1. From Rags To Riches: How I Made A Fortune Selling All These Filthy Rags That I Slept On To Buy The Best Mattress That Money From Selling All These Filthy Rags Could Buy
  2. She was Dummy Thicc but I had a Thumby Dick
  3. Apples or Oranges, they’re all the same to me Doc. Can you get them out of my butthole or what?
  4. My Pig’s In A Blanket, So I Guess It’s Time To Yank It!
  5. Sticks and stones may break my bones! ...actually they will break my bones. My boner that is! Ouch!
  6. Some Rum, Your Thumb, My Bum: Panama!
  7. If You Step On A Crack, You’ll Break Your Mother’s......Crack.
  8. I’m eating Dunkaroos in my Dungarees, you Buckaroo! Just let me be!
  9. One large Root Beer please, hold the Root! While you're at it, hold the Beer too. Actually could you just hold me?
  10. Early To Bed, Early To Rise, Bite The Pillow ‘Cause I’m Going In Dry!
  11. They call me Famous Amos ‘cause of my cookies (and Famous Anus ‘cause of my dookies!)
  12. Did you meet the Turkey from Albuquerque? Her feathers are bright and her breasts are perky...
  13. The Married Life Is Fun And Games (Unless You're Married To Kevin James...)
  14. Hey baby girl, won’t you back that ass up? This is a loading zone!
  15. Your Honor, we now invite the Jury to recognize my client's micropenis.
  16. Hey, who's that little brown fella in the toilet?
  17. I like my women like a Firestone Tire: thick, round, and black!
  18. That Lusty Wench on the City Bench sure looks a lot like Judi Dench
  19. While Testicular Manslaughter isn't technically a crime, I'm gonna lock you up anyways just to be safe!
  20. I'm Gonna Crawl Through The Shopping Mall 'Till Everyone's Seen My Dick And Balls
  21. Have you heard about my new comfy chair? Oh boy...you're gonna want to sit down for this...
  22. I'm Writing You A Letter In My Turtleneck Sweater About How I Kissed Your Mom And How That Upset Her
  23. I Cock-A-Diddle-Didn't kill your pet rooster! I didn't Cock-A-Doodle-Doo it!!
  24. Jingle Bells, My Fart Smells, Just Like A Rotten Egg!
  25. Hush little baby, don't say a word! Mommy's gonna clean up your stinky little turd!
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