Rubber baby buggy bumpers, makes my dick go thumpy thumpers

[Rubber baby buggy bumpers, makes my dick go thumpy thumpers]

Rubber baby buggy bumpers, makes my dick go thumpy thumpers

[Everyone told me that a flashlight is the best light... But I can't see shit with this thing]

Everyone told me that a flashlight is the best light... But I can't see shit with this thing

[I'll heckle your schmechel for a shekel]

I'll heckle your schmechel for a shekel

[You say tomato, I say red ball of shit]

You say tomato, I say red ball of shit

[Someone needs to tell Ben Schwartz that space forts cause face warts unless he snorts quartz with his favorite escorts]

Someone needs to tell Ben Schwartz that space forts cause face warts unless he snorts quartz with his favorite escorts.

[Mirror mirror on the wall, whys my peen so gosh darn small?]

Mirror mirror on the wall, whys my peen so gosh darn small?

[I wish I may, I wish I might, inside weirdest Kulap, put my peen tonight <3]

I wish I may, I wish I might, inside weirdest Kulap, put my peen tonight

[My secret to being good at sex is that I make a dolphin noise when I orgasm. I go E-e-E-e, she says she finished, then we both leave satisfied.]

My secret to being good at sex is that I make a dolphin noise when I orgasm. I go E-e-E-e, she says she finished, then we both leave satisfied

[The people demanded more Cake Boss, and today.... We deliver]

The people demanded more Cake Boss, and today.... We deliver

[Calvin, don't piss on my leg and tell me it was hobbes]

Calvin, don't piss on my leg and tell me it was hobbes

[People say I have a horse face, but this is clearly the face of an ass]

People say I have a horse face, but this is clearly the face of an ass

[I'm so depressed, just the shell of a man. Is anyone's hermit crab looking for a new home?]

I'm so depressed, just the shell of a man. Does anyone's hermit crab need a new home?

[In soviet Russia, phrase catch you]

In soviet Russia, phrase catch you 

[If candies and nuts were boobies and butts, I'd finally be having an orgy]

If candies and nuts were boobies and butts, I'd finally be having an orgy

[I asked for candies and nuts not boobies and butts. How am I supposed to crank one out to this?]

I asked for candies and nuts not boobies and butts. How am I supposed to crank one out to this?

[Put down your pizza pocket and grab a pocket pussy, it's time for cum-edy bang bang, Americas premier porn podcast]

Put down your pizza pocket and grab a pocket pussy it's time for cum-edy bang bang, Americas premier porn podcast

[Riddle me this, riddle me that, why did my peen go splat splat splat?]

Riddle me this, riddle me that, why did my peen go splat splat splat?

[I've heard of snack packs, but hampax? Sign me up for that charcuterie board]

I've heard of snack packs, but hampax? Sign me up for that charcuterie board

[If Euripides’ Shorts, I'll rip-a dat ass]

If Euripides’ Shorts, I'll rip-a dat ass

[Mirror mirror on the wall, why's my dick so fucking small?]

Mirror mirror on the wall, why's my dick so fucking small? 

[Mama Mia, I pissed on the pizza... Here have a slice]

Mama Mia, I pissed on the pizza... Here have a slice