Tony the Poopbutt Butterfly

Got another Rubik’s Cube stuck in my stupid pubes.

whoa ... you are on a roll. very nice.

nice! I was wondering if there were some person out there with way more ambition than me who catalogued all the accepted catchphrases throughout the years ... I know there's a spreadsheet floating around that logs every PFT podcast appearance ever -- the spreadsheet is for every podcast, not just CBB. It'd be super cool if we got it on the CBB wiki.

Some dream of a world where dogs piss beer; Others live in a world where they drink dog piss.

Your years of torture in the prison camp sound rough, but my organs are made of LEGO and I just passed a 2x6 kidney brick out my urethra.

Unicorn horns are horse porn and narwhal tusks are smut musk; I want classier, like a pole dancer with moose antlers.

A fortune cookie fortune in all your heroin condoms will make cavity searches fun for the whole family.

You’re thinking of the legendary beast from American literature, but I said, ‘Toby Dick,’ which is not as legendary and also from my pants.

Broke both ankles in a rocket skate accident; broke both wrists in a pocket-bate accident.

When in a room full of sassy pants, be the swassiest.

Fry Guy, which dangling tassel is your dick? I’m trying to settle a bet.

Climbed to the top of the Madderhorn only to reach the bottom of the Disappointerhorn.

“Hey, nematode. Go fuck yourself.” “Hey, non-asexual reproducer, I just did and I’m having twins.”

At Acme Looniversity I earned my Toon Degree, and now I’m a hedge fund manager worth millions who fucks big-titty anvils.

If you put wood chips in a wood chipper, you just end up with more wood chips

If you tell me to "Sith your pants, do not" one more time, Yoda, I'm gonna Sith in your mouth.

Go ahead and steal my nudes but nobody wants to see that much cabbage and mustard

There's nuts on these nuns and we're nuts for Jesus buns.

You may be the Patron Saint of Good Ideas, but I’m a nun with nuts and you didn’t think of me.

Technically, it was aortic valve regurgitation that led to failure, but sure, God, I guess you could say I died from "heart farts."

It fires out and feels like fire, yet it's not called fire-rhea.

Flat Stanley wasn't flat until he was crushed by a kaiju dick.

For sale: baby shoes, worn by an asshole.

Thanks to testicular cancer, I now say "Diz nut!"

The jerk store called and said they’re all out of Stu.