Teenage Grave Robber

“Do not turn to mediums or wizards; do not seek them out, to be defiled by them: I am the Lord your God.”

Damn, the Bible be crazy.

If pizza were illegal, I’d probably just follow the law

I’m a George on the streets and a Ringo in the sheets

Where’s the shrimp?

Ooo you’re a knotty rope, aren’t you

I heard most of The Muppets were at the Capitol riots

A race car? that’s so messed up.

Oooooooo there better be shrimp there

If you’ve never seen a dino-soar I guess you’ve never heard of pterodactyls.

My back’s aching/my bra’s too tight/my booty’s shaking from the left to the right. This chiropractor is weird.

Darth Vader is my Daddy

Sing for me, worm

Time traveling wife my ass

Please rise: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which it stands. One nation, under God, indivisible with Liberty and justice for all.

There some toes on this mouse

Dental school be like, “lol, wanna clean some teeth with me?”

Put the fish back and pull your pants up. This is the Lord’s house.

Winnie the Pooh wears skinny jeans too

Pumpkin soup for the table, please

Get in loser - we’re digging graves.

I’m fun! I’m so fun! I promise I’m fun. See, I’ll have the spicy margarita! I’m doing it!

School’s rules make fools drool

If you all don’t quiet down right now, I will cancel Prom. Just try me.

spaghetti now. Ice cream later.