Teenage Grave Robber

My boyfriend’s name is James Bond and he’ll have a martini, please.

I keep eating milk and cookies but the truth is....i just want that milk.

Am I on a bus? Where am I?

Darth Vader is my daddy..

SHUT UUUUUPPPP!!!!

Zombies literally only want one thing and it’s disgusting.

i usually wake up, sneeze a bunch, then go to the bathroom to sneeze some more, brush my teeth, sneeze, then sneeze in the shower, get dressed, say hi to my cats and sneeze.

Take me to glizzy island.

Musical guest: Baby Gollum and the E Street Band

Marry me, pizza bot. You’ll never have to be alone.

I just finished watching “Airplane” and boy are my arms tired.

My name is Scott Aukerman and I have adult onset Goth syndrome

Girls just wanna be nuns

Lil Yachty’s Dukati has a body like a naughty Maserati karate hottie’s potty.

make Kermit the Frog pregnant, please.

Amber is the color of my underwear

There some bows on this blouse