Teenage Grave Robber

Why do you wear your mom’s t-shirts? That’s so weird.

Time to rob them graves, dudes

I don’t want to be here

I’m writing a sitcom with a sassy, Italian matriarch named ‘Mia’. Gonna call it, “Mamma Mia” and you can’t stop me.

I am half as qualified and twice the price of a therapist.

This cake is an insult. It doesn’t look like my butt at all.

Oh so when a kid naps, that’s all normal. But when I kidnap it’s horrible?! Whatever.

We’re gonna walk down to electric avenue and you’re gonna return this damn robot!

Might as well face it. I’m addicted to milk.

I like the parts on this show when they cook meth.

Running up that hill with the hounds of love, under the big sky while mother stands for comfort; cloud busting, dreaming of sheep under ice, waking the witches. Watching you without me doing the jig of life, saying hello to the earth and the morning fog.

In the land of the deaf, the third eye blind is king.

Keep your friends close and your enemies glen

Halloween is over. You can stop eating candy out of pumpkins now.

Mi casa e poo casa

I can’t marry you. I leave for outer space tomorrow.

“Sorry I’m not a sari” said the wedding dress to the bride.

The best part of waking up is not doing it.

I hope you have a horrible Christmas

I’m a mango now

Well, bless your heart

Oh baby we’re cooking with grease now

My dad started a band called “Ramone and The Ramones”.

The crowning of the fire king begins

The devil made me duet